My boyfriend and I have been living together for a year now, just recently he took my world, and stirred it up as if it were a snow globe...now it's a mess!
Just to give you some background he and I are both previously married, he was with his ex wife from the time he was 18 to 28. Then after he and she split he met his ex gf, after a year and 1/2 together she left him. Her reasoning was that he didnt' seem happy with himself and she wanted him to get happy healthy and better so that they could have a future. SO she left him, moved out and he was devastated he couldn't eat, sleep, focus...nothing. Well three or four months after that he met me. We hit it off and he seemed to be doing alright, and we got serious. I asked him from the very beginning was he sure he didn't need more time, was he sure he was ready for a relationship. His answer was yes...we both worked for the same company and I was commuting 3 hours everyday to work. So after 3 months we decided to move intogether so i wouldn't have to be paying for storage, and tolls, not to mention the wear and tear on my car. Things were going great..we hit the 6 month mark and he started this bit of not being on his own, and needing to be, I went away for a few days and I took up some of my own hobbies, and things seemed to pan out.
Well that was in september of last year..things were great we have always gotten along..and there were many times he'd seem distant, and not wanting to be bothered. well recently it's been even more so. He advised me that he never wants to get married to anyone, nor does he ever want to have kids. Well that kind of struck me as odd because he had talked about marriage with me and i knew at one point he was even contimplating marrying his ex when she left him. So.....this past weekend he told me that he really needs to be on his own, to get happy.....mind you i've gotten rid of all of my furniture I had from my place becuase he assured me this was it...that there wouldn't be a need for me to ever need to get new furniture. So now i am like great I can't even move out to get my own place because I have no means of doing so. I was just recently laid off from my job, and now this. So i decided to write him a letter basically saying i was going to go away for a week two weeks whatever and give him some time to think about things...because once I am gone and move out that is it no second chances...i will not set myself up for such heartache again. Well it's day two of me being away from him, and I miss him so much. He seems to be going about his business like nothing is bothering him. He called me last night and i have yet to get be able to get ahold of him, he hastn' returned my calls, and is being rather short with me. I asked him last night if he wanted me to call him back and he said "I never said you couldn't call me" to me he is a priority and it seems as if I am not a priority to him. Is me just plain out leaving him alone for a week going to work...does anyone think that once someone in his spot realizes what it would be like to have me gone out of his life will he wake up and smell the coffee...i honestly think he is just scared because he knows I am not going to leave him..maybe he is testing me anyone have any honest supportive advice? I am torn over here and this is tearing me apart