I recently broke up with my girlfriend of 11 months. Although i initiated it, ever since i have felt confused. The basic reason for breaking up was that i felt she was smothering me and that i needed space. Could this feeling be guilt or could it be regret. I really dont know. Help!!
+ Follow This Topic
Results 1 to 13 of 13
Thread: Advice welcome!!!!!
-
01-03-06, 07:24 AM #1
Normal User
- Join Date
- Mar 2006
- Posts
- 3
Advice welcome!!!!!
-
01-03-06, 07:27 AM #2
Normal User
- Join Date
- Feb 2006
- Location
- Netherlands
- Posts
- 256
could be both. Only one who can judge that is you.
On really romantic evenings of self, I go salsa dancing with my confusion...
-
01-03-06, 07:28 AM #3
Normal User
- Join Date
- Feb 2006
- Location
- Earth-Texas-Houston
- Posts
- 84
why didn't you initiate a time off instead of a permanent breakup? sometimes taking time off for space is good for relationships.
Well, i'm not sure if anyone know if this is guilt or regret. probably only you can answer this question.Circumstances or people can take away your material possessions, they can take away your money, and they can take away your health. But no one can ever take away our precious memories. So, don't forget to make time and take the opportunities to make memories everyday. To everything there is a season and a time for every purpose under heaven
-
01-03-06, 07:30 AM #4
Normal User
- Join Date
- Mar 2006
- Posts
- 3
Well we did have a time off but i still felt like i needed more space. Prob is i know she doesnt have many good friends at the mo and she must be going through shit
-
01-03-06, 07:31 AM #5
Normal User
- Join Date
- Mar 2006
- Posts
- 3
Has anyone else ever felt like so confused that your brain wont actually think straight?
-
01-03-06, 07:38 AM #6
Normal User
- Join Date
- Feb 2006
- Location
- Netherlands
- Posts
- 256
all the time. It's called life and making choices. Seems it's mostly guilt according to your post (you thinking how shitty she must feel). If you are up for getting back together, you might want to call her and ask to chat about your history. But do NOT call her if you're not certain, will only mess her up more in the end, which is not the nicest thing to do.
On really romantic evenings of self, I go salsa dancing with my confusion...
-
01-03-06, 08:26 AM #7
Normal User
- Join Date
- Jun 2005
- Posts
- 1,445
Yep!!! This is the tricky business of relationships.
I don't think that with anyone you love you can feel "all good, all the time."
Sometimes the person may even weigh less important to you in terms of priorities - as in you need more time for friends, for personal interests, for family - for YOURSELF.
Be clear that you are not feeling like this just because you are feeling guilty. Although - feeling compassion for her is also a byproduct of love.
You wouldn't have known that you just needed a break....how do you know anything until you go through it?
Really, she probably does need to learn to be less clingy (most girls are this way, by the way...at least to SOME degree...it is a girl thing).
AND....you may just want to begin communicating when you need space and how specifically you need it.
For now....while you're so confused....you may want to stay broken up. Maybe she will entertain being friends with you for a while...or maybe not being full on boyfriend/girlfriend but to start "dating" again...????
-
01-03-06, 10:23 PM #8
Normal User
- Join Date
- Feb 2006
- Location
- Earth-Texas-Houston
- Posts
- 84
I totally agreed. You give great advices.
Originally Posted by clynn
Circumstances or people can take away your material possessions, they can take away your money, and they can take away your health. But no one can ever take away our precious memories. So, don't forget to make time and take the opportunities to make memories everyday. To everything there is a season and a time for every purpose under heaven
-
01-03-06, 10:32 PM #9
Normal User
- Join Date
- Aug 2005
- Location
- Philly, PA
- Posts
- 4,497
Your SN is "ginger" and you're a guy??
[URL=http://imageshack.us]
[/URL]
-
02-03-06, 01:08 AM #10
Normal User
- Join Date
- Feb 2006
- Location
- Earth-Texas-Houston
- Posts
- 84
that's what i was thinking too... maybe it's his gf's name? Originally Posted by Lloyd95
.....or maybe he's a she..asking about her relationship with a girl...
Circumstances or people can take away your material possessions, they can take away your money, and they can take away your health. But no one can ever take away our precious memories. So, don't forget to make time and take the opportunities to make memories everyday. To everything there is a season and a time for every purpose under heaven
-
02-03-06, 02:44 AM #11
Normal User
- Join Date
- Jun 2005
- Posts
- 1,445
That's true. WE don't know if this is a girl-girl or boy-girl relationship we're talkign about.
-
02-03-06, 03:09 AM #12
Normal User
- Country:
- Join Date
- Mar 2005
- Gender
- Location
- Where you live
- Posts
- 2,506
tell her you feel smothered and to stop smothering you. unless, what you really don't want is to be with her.
"Ogres are like onions."
-
02-03-06, 03:28 AM #13
Normal User
- Join Date
- Jun 2005
- Posts
- 1,445
I was thinking more about it and I think that maybe you should stay broken up for longer before you start to think about contacting her re: a possible reconciliation.
The reason? It will force her to work on her independence. Sometimes you have to be Cruel to be kind.
Similar Threads
-
Job Advice in the Love Advice Section
By Junket in forum Love Advice forumReplies: 6Last Post: 21-02-07, 04:07 AM
