I have a problem. Eversince I was young, when it comes to studies, I've always been competitive and would strive to top the best. And if I don't, I feel like a real sore loser and even a little jealous.
The problem wasn't that serious until recently when I was playing boardgames with my boyfriend. Maybe because he's smarter than me and wins almost every game we play together, that side of me that wasn't an issue before appeared. It's been quite hard to control and overcome.
I've talked to my boyfriend about this before and he stressed to me that it's just a game. I understood that, but somehow, 'inside' I'm not listening and it rears its ugly head whenever I'm losing very badly.
I've tried repeating to myself that it's just a game like a mantra, but whenever he plays to win, I just get...mad! ;( Inside I'm like..."If it's not about winning, why is he playing so hard to win?! God, I want to win too!!!" And the mantra just gets thrown out of the window.
What can I do? I like playing boardgames, generally. But I'm an emotional player and it's difficult to control my feelings when it comes to losing to him.