Break up

[swish]

Well I was dumped last night. The reason? She can't be in a relationship right now. She's been really stressed the past few weeks, and I personally feel that's to blame, because we were great before. But she said she still loves me to bits, and she's already regretting her decision. My question is, what can I do? I'm gonna give her some space, I've told her how much I love her, but it only led to tears. Should I give her a few weeks to sort herself out then try again? Or wait for her to contact me? She considers me one of her closest friends, and she wants to remain friends, but it'll be tough for me because I still love her

[Zach]

You should know that if you love her, you can't be friends with her. Its going to kill you. And maybe her too. Im thinking not her though because she is breaking up with you.

Cut Contact, back off and if she wants to come back she will. Sorry to hear this happened to you. I've been there before.

Im very skeptical of her reason for breaking up with you, but that is just me. I don't see how you can break up with someone if you truly love them, unless there is something very serious going on in the background.

I think stress is a cop out reason.

[Gigabitch]

+1

Yes- go No Contact. You have to protect yourself.

[Mathias]

You should know that if you love her, you can't be friends with her. Its going to kill you.

Listen to Zach. He knows stuff.

[hitch]

Giving her space is the best thing you can do, man. Seriously, you're a bigger person for that than being all over her about this. She'll realize she needs you...

[Soulfire]

Sorry to hear your story. Wish there was something I could say, but truth is I'm hurting right now and can't even help myself.

[michaelmorgan]

Cheer up!

I could start with what Richard Bach said...If you love someone..let her go..if she really loves you, she will come back to you... BUT WE ARE TALKING ABOUT REAL PEOPLE HERE, not about fancy words on a page.

swish, when people really love each other, they do not walk away from one another. Just because she is a woman it doesn't mean it is ok for her to act like this.
I could write a lot about you and especially her mind and I will sum up all that should tell you the most in the fastest way.

If you will ever be again together, what if she will be stressed again? Like when you and her should get married..you know the stress..dress, party, guests, invitations, catering, music, balloons...WHAT WILL HAPPEN THE VERY NEXT TIME SHE WILL BE STRESSED AGAIN? Should you buy yourself a comfortable couch as far away from your future bride so she will be able to escape stress?
THE BIG POINTS HERE are among the following:
- How did this relationship complicated her life so bad that she had to cut it off? Did she feel suffocated? Unable to express herself? Unable to connect with you? How was your sex life?
- As a man you should always be a fountain of energy, joy and excitement for your girlfriend. Women should start a relationship with you just to drink life from your lips, live dreams from your eyes and feel passion from your hands. STRESS has nothing to do with it.

If I were you and I could turn back time, I would take her on a short but intense getaway, where I would mix connection with passion. I would share memories of me and her, of our little secrets and habits, I would kiss her on her forehead and then on her lips....I GUARANTEE YOU, she will not see the stress of a relationship but the pleasure of drinking a cocktail of intense pleasure and inner fulfillment.

Now what should you do now? You missed a train, for sure.
Should you give her space? If you and her really connected with each other, you should already know if this is a solution. As you are quite clueless, you may have missed another train.

To sum it up, I want you to think what would be a better option for her? Empty spaces or laugther, joy, smile, intimacy and connection?

Let me know any news and best of luck.

[swish]

Cheer up!
If you will ever be again together, what if she will be stressed again? Like when you and her should get married..you know the stress..dress, party, guests, invitations, catering, music, balloons...WHAT WILL HAPPEN THE VERY NEXT TIME SHE WILL BE STRESSED AGAIN? Should you buy yourself a comfortable couch as far away from your future bride so she will be able to escape stress?
THE BIG POINTS HERE are among the following:
- How did this relationship complicated her life so bad that she had to cut it off? Did she feel suffocated? Unable to express herself? Unable to connect with you? How was your sex life?
- As a man you should always be a fountain of energy, joy and excitement for your girlfriend. Women should start a relationship with you just to drink life from your lips, live dreams from your eyes and feel passion from your hands. STRESS has nothing to do with it.

If I were you and I could turn back time, I would take her on a short but intense getaway, where I would mix connection with passion. I would share memories of me and her, of our little secrets and habits, I would kiss her on her forehead and then on her lips....I GUARANTEE YOU, she will not see the stress of a relationship but the pleasure of drinking a cocktail of intense pleasure and inner fulfillment.

Now what should you do now? You missed a train, for sure.
Should you give her space? If you and her really connected with each other, you should already know if this is a solution. As you are quite clueless, you may have missed another train.

To sum it up, I want you to think what would be a better option for her? Empty spaces or laugther, joy, smile, intimacy and connection?

Let me know any news and best of luck.

Wow, this exact point hit home the very next day. I realised that, and a lot of things. The past few weeks I'd been stressed myself, and while I was able to raise her spirits before, I hadn't been doing that lately. I should have put my own problems aside when around her, instead of burdening her even more. I contacted her the day after break up, I told her I understood everything now, and I asked her for a fresh start as good friends. (She asked me for this the night of break up, I was too upset to tell her then). She was very happy and we talked for a couple hours about other topics. The next day however, she seemed down, and when she didn't reply to one text I talked with one of our mates. He's known her for longer than me, and he says that usually with space and a bit of time she pulls through. Besides, it's very hard to contact her when she's feeling down. Now I'm gonna give her space to sort herself out, if she texts back, great, I'm getting on with my own life for now. If it turns out she wants me back, I'll have to talk with her, ask her what happens next time she's stressed, among other topics. But for now I'm happy to be friends, I'll stay happy and show her the guy she wanted to be with in the first place.