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Thread: Is this guy serious ? or am I in the friendzone ?

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    Is this guy serious ? or am I in the friendzone ?

    Hi,

    I've met the original bad-boy at work (not the same company as me) and thought it was fun at first, remembering historic disasters with guys like this (party animals) I decided to keep wel clear of this one. Fat luck, as he wasn't about to leave me alone!

    I used to be a bit of a wild thing myself...and being around him (he comes into my office at least 5x a day) I feel it is all coming back. I really can't afford it with the position I have now...but hell....i love being around him.

    Ever since he got my # he's texted me about 70 times (in 3 wks) these were never sexually tinted, but always about some fun or crazy stuff he'd been doing. He's also texted met from other phones, or called me to say he had no credit left .

    A couple of years ago I made up my mind that long term relationships weren't for me, they never worked out (i'm 35 and the longest relationship has lasted 6months) so to keep from getting hurt, I decided the occasional one nighter would do me. Which was exactly what I had in mind with this guy I figured him being such a outgoing, extravert type, he would probably jump at the chance and would even probably feel the same way.

    In the last 3 weeks he's asked me out at least 6-8 times, which I had to decline because of several reasons (time !) He asked me to dinner Friday, but something came up (work) and it didn't happen- so later he called me if i'd like to come round for a DVD evening, which I did. From walking into his appartement, it was like we'd been friends for 10yrs. We soon started a bottle of whiskey and a waterpipe and had a ball of a time watching Ice Age. I stayed over and slept on a matress in the living room, he slept on a smaller matrass next to me. He left for work at 5 in the morning- I didn''t get up, but left soon after.

    He never even tried to make a move...which I had not expected from a guy like this.

    Is he taking this serious....or am I just a friend to him ?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ngirl View Post

    I've met the original bad-boy at work
    lol yea right. Is it your own personal weakness that causes your mind to see someone "stupid" as a "bad boy" type? Number one cause of bad boy syndrome is stupidity, on both party member's.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ngirl View Post
    which I had not expected from a guy like this.
    A guy like what? what gives you the impression that he is a bad boy?

    a guy who text messages 70 times a day and sleeps on separate mattresses sounds like a pussy to me.
    Last edited by Only-virgins; 03-09-07 at 04:29 AM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ngirl View Post
    Is he taking this serious....or am I just a friend to him ?
    You were looking for a one-nighter! What, exactly, was he supposed to take seriously?

    Anyway, it sounds like he isn't interested in being a one-nighter.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    Either he wasn't interested or he was waiting for you to make a move.
    "Making plans to change the world, while the world is changing us."

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    @only-virgins: if I had posted all the stuff he's been up to in this topic, all you guys would have come back with answers like "stay away from this guy" take it from me...he's not suitable material to introduce to my (or any) parents. I wasn't about to turn the topic this way, as that was not my question.
    About the pussy bit exactly my thoughts....I didn't see it coming !

    @vashti: my original idea included a one-nighter, but damn, he makes me laugh, he's sort of "grown" on me, i'm not saying in-love yet....

    @vain; apparantly he wasn't looking for a one-nighter, which baffles me. And you're also right, either he's not interested or he wants to give me time, take it slow...and though I hate to admit it- I hope its the last option.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ngirl View Post
    @vain; apparantly he wasn't looking for a one-nighter, which baffles me. And you're also right, either he's not interested or he wants to give me time, take it slow...and though I hate to admit it- I hope its the last option.
    Why does this baffles you? Not all guys want a one night stand. If you just wanted a one nighter with him tell him that because he may want a relationship and you don't.

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    it baffles me because all the ingredients were there to let this get way out of hand. And as I said before, the one-nighter was the original idea, until I developed feelings for this guy !

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    He called me yesterday evening Glad he doesn't go by the 4 day rule ! We talked for nearly 2 hrs !

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    Well, he COULD be gay!

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    missleepy: you've got a mean streak in you I think I can rule that possibility out, he wouldn't last very long in the job he's got if that was the case

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    What jon, and why?

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    I'm having trouble understanding why its necessarily a bad thing to have feelings for someone and to allow a relationship with another human being of the opposite sex to go beyond a "one-nighter". Maybe he is a bad boy, but as they say there truly is someone for everyone--even those someones who think they don't need or want another someone.
    There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved with a suitable application of high explosives.

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    @missleepy: he's a scaffolding supervisor on a large construction site (petrochemical) a real tough world.

    @exponovak: i'm not complaining !! I had just basically given up hope in that departement- thought it was not for me

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ngirl View Post
    missleepy: you've got a mean streak in you I think I can rule that possibility out, he wouldn't last very long in the job he's got if that was the case
    Okay, we all know I have a dirty mind, so nobody should be surprised that I immediately thought, "He's a porn star".
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