When is it really love?

[Jack121]

Hi...here is the story...after almost 15 years I rekindled a friendship with a girl I had a crush on when I was 13, and things began to get serious...three months later we are still having a wonderful time together, but we had to go our seperate ways as we live in different countries. We talked about marriage and about her moving here, but deep down I am fearful that I will have trouble supporting her..she has little education, or money and things will be very difficult

my question how do you know that you love someone enough to do almost anything that is required to be with them?

thanks
Jack

[lesa]

Whether times are good, bad, happy, or sad you still love the person then it is strong.

[Lipp]

You know it when you actually do it.

To be honest I think this is for you yourself to decide. You have to measure the possible difficulties that you might face in the future against how much you love her and will love her. And if love triumphs, do it. But if the difficulties are overwhelming, maybe it is better to wait.

I've never been much of a believer of "Love conquers all". If you end up having a stressful and harsh lifestyle it will be increasingly difficult to maintain a loving and kind relationship.

[lesa]

Love does not guarantee that you will spend your time with that person. You have to decide whether you want to deal with moving and supporting her and love is not always enough.

[Mish]

Hi...here is the story...after almost 15 years I rekindled a friendship with a girl I had a crush on when I was 13, and things began to get serious...three months later we are still having a wonderful time together, but we had to go our seperate ways as we live in different countries. We talked about marriage and about her moving here, but deep down I am fearful that I will have trouble supporting her..she has little education, or money and things will be very difficult

my question how do you know that you love someone enough to do almost anything that is required to be with them?

thanks
Jack

You might have had a crush on her for 15 years, but you've only been together for 3 months, imo that's too soon to be talking about marriage. Spend some more time together as a couple first.

[overlooked]

u'll give just about everything that u have. even if it means ur life. as someone says "love isn't about loving a perfect someone, but loving someone perfectly"

[Cain]

It's hard for us to tell you. Everyone has their own definition of what love is.

Ultimately, you accept everything about that person. All of their flaws and all of their strengths. You can't imagine your life without that person in it. You still have an amazing time after the infatuation stage loses its shine.

Those are just some of the ways.

[DoesntMatter]

Love only exists within a family as far as I can tell

[Cain]

Love only exists within a family as far as I can tell

So, you're saying love in relationships doesn't exist?

[Mish]

Relationships are family (in progress)

[Cain]

Relationships are family (in progress)

I guess I thought he meant blood family.

[IndiReloaded]

You might have had a crush on her for 15 years, but you've only been together for 3 months, imo that's too soon to be talking about marriage. Spend some more time together as a couple first.

I agree. Crushing on someone, or even 'love from afar' for that long is nothing like a relationship *together*. In fact, I'm certain you'll have some unlearning to do regarding how you think of this gal.

When it comes to relationships of this type, one tends to fill in the gaps with fantasy that may not live up to the cold light of reality. Give it time & keep your expectations under control.

[lastwish]

my question how do you know that you love someone enough to do almost anything that is required to be with them?

thanks
Jack

Your answer is right in your question. You know you love someone when you will do almost anything that is required to be with them.

[Jack121]

Thanks everyone..your input has been very helpful!!

Jack

[Gigabitch]

If you have to ask, Jack, you don't love her that much.