hello everyone

[okflyer1]

i'm a 62 year old guy, i have 2 teenadge boys at home, their mother just left monday , and told the boys they and me need to make a new life for ourselves, on wednesday she came over , we cooked burgers, she got a few things, and we talked a little the younger boy 16, asked his mother if she was coming back home and she replied I don't know, I sugested we see a marriage counslor, she said she didn't know about all that, then the youngest said i think you should mom "it couldn't hurt", and she agreed, now on thursday she sent me an e-mail telling me to leave her alone, stop trying to dominate her life, we need to make a new life for ourselves, i agreed to talk to YOUR counslor , i am concerned about your and the childrens welfare but i can't fix it, i'm going to the lake this week end and i'll be ok, i'll call you monday, have a good week end, thanks, now i noticed on wednsday she was still wearing her wedding rings, does that mean anything, can anyone give me a clue what to do, this is making me nuts....bill

[Illusional]

technically she IS still married to you.

i'm sure that she still has feelings for you, but right now, she doesn't know if she still wants to go though with a divorce or just remain separated or whatever. you two have a lot of history together considering the length of your marriage. i think that she probably will wear the ring as long as you two are married, or until she finally decides that the marriage is doomed and a divorce is approaching. work it out while you can if you want to save this marriage.

raverboy

[SimpleSolution]

Sorry about your unfortunate situation. First of all how old is your wife?? My guess is that she has taken a step back and is looking at her life as it is and she wants to change her direction. Dont take it personally.....Maybe you have provided her with all everything possible it really makes no differance bottom line is she is looking to change her life and unfortunately she has no regard for everyone elses feelings at the moment. This is a selfish act however we are all here for a short time and we need to be selfish at times. There is no nice way of leaveing someone much less your entire family.

At your age you need to be selfish as well and move on so you can simplify your life...this is a confusion you do not need at this point. I have a friend who was in a similar situation he is also 60 years of age and his wife of 15 good years up and left as well. He now has a girlfriend and is pretty dam happy. His ex constantly calls to rehash the relationship but he has moved on now. He said to me the other day that he did not realize he could be happier with someone else and he was in a rut with his ex-wife and just did not see it.

Maybe your answer is as simple as cutting ties and not put the effort in when it is her decission to move on so i say accept it. Try and stay focused with your kids and work and let time work everything else out and agian at your age you do not need this confusion.

[Mish]

inow on thursday she sent me an e-mail telling me to leave her alone, stop trying to dominate her life, we need to make a new life for ourselves, i agreed to talk to YOUR counslor , i am concerned about your and the childrens welfare but i can't fix it, i'm going to the lake this week end and i'll be ok, i'll call you monday, have a good week end, thanks, now i noticed on wednsday she was still wearing her wedding rings, does that mean anything, can anyone give me a clue what to do, this is making me nuts....bill

It sounds like she needs some time to think things through. Give her that time. Be prepared on what to do if she does decide to leave.

Did she say what her reasons were for wanting to leave?

[immortal.]

welcome to forum..