How often is it normal to shag?

[Hellfire]

Thanks for your input guys. I don't feel like a prude any more and I got the courage to stand up to him and sort out a solution. We've come up with something that seems to be working out for both of us and it's so much better! I really appreciate most of the comments.

Thanks again.

[Illusional]

what is this solution, or are you just saying this because you're tired of hearing us tell you off?

raverboy

[Pears]

Wouldn't his cock have fallen off already?

[BFTrick]

I just wanted to throw it out there that there isnt a normal amount. And that you shouldn't care what the normal amount is.

If he wanted to have sex 14 times a week and you didnt, you shouldnt have sex. Conversly, if he wanted sex once a month and you didnt, you dont need to have sex.

I just started dating someone and we have been having sex 2-3 times a day when we see each other. This week it has been 7 times.

[Hellfire]

what is this solution, or are you just saying this because you're tired of hearing us tell you off?

raverboy

No, we legitimately came up with a solution. Firstly, I moved the computer into another room so if he wants to go and I don't, then he can go to the computer room and watch whatever he wants and I can go about doing other stuff. Secondly, we came up with a safe word...well sort of. We already had a safe word for stop, so we just came up with another one for 'I'm not interested' That way, there's no confusion or argument. Plus I just feel better because I know it's not me being weird, so I don't take any crap, just send him on his way.

[Illusional]

what are these safe words might i ask?

raverboy

[Gigabitch]

"Get that thing off my thigh".

[Illusional]

and where would you like to me to put this thing into??

raverboy

[vorguen]

I always read these forums but I never feel like responding.

For the first time I felt like saying something.

What is with him forcing you down and masturbating over you!?


Huge red flag I think.

I got a quite scared.

[Pears]

I never really understood why people need "safe-words" for saying no to sex. A few times in the past my boyfriend wouldn't stop when I said no. We had a talk and then he told me that we should make up a safeword if it bothered me, but I said that no means no and stop means stop. For some reason, he thought that during sex, no means yes and stop means keep going.

[Cain]

I'm curious how many times is kinda usual to be having sex. I've read a lot of posts and see 3-4 times a week coming up often and appearing normal. Are most guys happy with that?

I feel like my boyfriend (22) is absolutely sex mad, but perhaps I'm wrong. He wants sex, as in legitimately wants sex and wants it now, about 3-4 times daily. It can't be a quickie either, it lasts at least an hour each time. At first it was great I suppose, but we've been together for over 2 years now. If I refuse he gets really angry and disappointed and either holds me down whilst he masturbates over me or watches porn to get off.

I feel sorta like he's saying "well you're not good enough, so I'll go elsewhere". It's been going on so long now that whenever he starts with me the bottom drops out of my stomach and I start to feel stressed and worried, not a real turn on. Then, because I'm not turned on he gets annoyed again and the cycle continues.

I'm not sure whether it's me that isn't enough or whether he is wanting too much. We still have sex about 5-7 times a week, but I'm beginning to hate it because I get made to feel so useless at other times anyway.

All advice welcome,
Hellfire (21)

If he doesn't have sex with you 3 or 4 times a day he HAS to go watch porn to get off? That's unhealthy. He has problems and he needs help.

I can have sex 3 or 4 times a day occasionally. The problem is that I just get drained and it will take me too long to get off if it's too close together.

Normally, me and my girlfriend have sex about twice a day.

[tooxshort]

Reminds me of Chazz Michael Michaels (Will Ferrell) in "Blades of Glory" ... the sex addict.

The amount of sex that guy wants makes my nuts hurt.

[Cain]

It was mentioned earlier, but how could you walk after 4 times every day? My girlfriend tells me that her vaginal area is sore after only twice a day.

[firefly]

I think the being held down in anger is really werid and wrong.....isnt that some sort of abuse

[SteBall]

hello... did anyone read the freaking post?? who cares about the frequency.. it's much more the forceful part that concerns me.

raverboy

I agree. As long as both partners are happy there is no 'norm'. Sometimes me and my ex would be at it every night of the week. At other times we could go weeks without. Either way we only did it when we both were in the mood.