It's Been A While

**JarrodHalsey** · 12-07-08, 05:36 AM

Its been a minute since I've posted here, but I come back with material!

Over the 4th of July weekend, I visited one of my college buddies in New England. While there, I met and hit it off very well with a nice young lady. She was into me despite knowing my infidelities with my ex and the story I shared here about my internet hoax...

...but since the initial hook-up, she has been making me jump through all sorts of hoops. When we hung out, she masterfully displayed her command of cat string theory complete with witholding contact, dismissive "granny" pecks and giving just enough attention to let me know she's interested. Since I've gotten back home, the game continues through inconsistent contact patterns.

I know how the game works, so I'm not even mad. I've benefitted many times in my life from my knowledge and execution of it. I'm just wondering, how many people out there are still playing the game? Is it a turn off? How much is too much? Is someone having such a command of the game a good or bad sign for you? Does putting in all this work actually lead to a healthy relationship or is it all just rhetoric at this point?

**Cain** · 12-07-08, 05:39 AM

I don't like games. I lose interest. Games were for when I was younger.

**starbuck** · 12-07-08, 07:43 AM

I don't understand the point of a game. Seems like all game-playing boils down to is a fear of rejection or a manipulation/control thing.

**someonelse** · 12-07-08, 07:49 AM

I hate games I think they're pointless. Someone who plays games will get bored once the chase is over. Happened to a girl friend of mine. She messed w/the guy for ever and a day and finally when they hooked up she was like OMG why is he not chasing me the way he used to? Stupid question... good luck.

**JarrodHalsey** · 13-07-08, 01:58 AM

Oh you've got to be kidding me, especially the ladies. Are you trying to tell me that when you mee a guy you like, you instantly succomb to your emotions? Contacting and hanging out with him when you want? No. You ALL make us put in some sort of work to win your affections. The only difference is that the amount of work varies from woman to woman. And anyone who has been a single adult and says otherwise is f'n LYING.

**Cain** · 13-07-08, 02:09 AM

Originally Posted by JarrodHalsey

Oh you've got to be kidding me, especially the ladies. Are you trying to tell me that when you mee a guy you like, you instantly succomb to your emotions? Contacting and hanging out with him when you want? No. You ALL make us put in some sort of work to win your affections. The only difference is that the amount of work varies from woman to woman. And anyone who has been a single adult and says otherwise is f'n LYING.

I don't consider games the same thing. Games are immature things that girls do when they want to toy with guys. I like when a girl plays hard to get, but not when she tries to toy with me while doing it. That's a game.

**starbuck** · 13-07-08, 02:23 AM

Originally Posted by JarrodHalsey

Oh you've got to be kidding me, especially the ladies. Are you trying to tell me that when you mee a guy you like, you instantly succomb to your emotions? Contacting and hanging out with him when you want? No. You ALL make us put in some sort of work to win your affections. The only difference is that the amount of work varies from woman to woman. And anyone who has been a single adult and says otherwise is f'n LYING.

Gotta love blanket statements about people.

There is such a thing as getting to know someone in your own time. That's not game-playing, that's just common sense. So a woman that doesn't throw herself at a guy is a "game player?"

It's the inconsistent behavior, calling someone frequently, and then dropping off the face of the earth for a while, for example, that makes it game playing. And I don't really understand the point. If someone does this with me, my immediate assumption is he's not interested, or only interested in one thing, otherwise he'd be more consistent.

Someone who would work that hard to try and manipulate other people's feelings is a person who needs some psychological help.

**misombra** · 13-07-08, 02:31 AM

you're not a player.

a real player would not tell a girl he just met that he's played girls out and cheated on them.

**Cain** · 13-07-08, 02:35 AM

Oh, and surprise surprise... another "we're having lots of problems after we ****ed so quickly.. with no effort" thread.

**shh!** · 13-07-08, 02:36 AM

I admit it. I make him work for it, but I don't really call it game playing... I suppose I consider it a weeding-out process. If he thinks he is entitled to affection or sex because I am attracted after a night or two, he needs to be weeded out, don't you think?

**Cain** · 13-07-08, 02:45 AM

Originally Posted by shh!

I admit it. I make him work for it, but I don't really call it game playing... I suppose I consider it a weeding-out process. If he thinks he is entitled to affection or sex because I am attracted after a night or two, he needs to be weeded out, don't you think?

Of course... this is expected. But this isn't game playing. Game playing, as mentioned, would be you getting him interested and then talking straight for a week and then just dropping contact off for a week or two because you want to make him wonder where you are.

**shh!** · 13-07-08, 03:18 AM

I think that's dumb. If I don't talk to him to keep him wondering, then he isn't talking to me either. I don't believe in punishing myself.

**Cain** · 13-07-08, 03:19 AM

I just don't believe in avoiding someone as part of a game.

**misombra** · 13-07-08, 03:24 AM

a lot of guys think it's a game.

when it's actually that the girl doesn't want to hang out with you anymore.

anachronistic · 13-07-08, 04:10 AM

Originally Posted by shh!

I admit it. I make him work for it, but I don't really call it game playing... I suppose I consider it a weeding-out process. If he thinks he is entitled to affection or sex because I am attracted after a night or two, he needs to be weeded out, don't you think?

I think it depends on the woman. Some women like that extra assurance before they go any further into the relationship, so that they don't have to waste time on an idiot guy. These are the women that have been in those crappy relationships, have been taken advantage of, who now know what the hell they are doing. That's classy. A young stupid girl may play stupid immature 'games', but I think her initial thoughts for doing so are out of immaturity. A young girl will fcuk with you just to fcuk with you.

And once you have done some flirting, you'll be able to distinguish between the two types.

I'd honestly reconsider dating a girl who didn't show any type of class. That is screaming with "PLZ OPEN MY LEGS AND RAM ME WITH YOUR C0K!!11"

Besides I kind of like those girls with class. Those are always the kind that say things which can be taken many different ways... and depending on what you know, you might just be able to win them over. I feel really connected with them, especially when I can't guess the motive behind their question, or read their mind. I am happy that not all women are that way

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