Grossing Atlantic for Ex boyfriend

[annalisa84]

I was together with my exboyfriend almost 2 yrs. We used to live together in Australia and everything was perfect but then 6 months ago we moved to Europe, his country. And the fighting began!Unfortunately I couldn't speak the language and thereby couldn't work, make friends etc. We both felt miserable during this time, like in prison. But still we sticked together and said we love each other!

Then we planned to go to USA together, him first, me couple of weeks later. Finally a place where we both can communicate and work! But as soon as he arrived in USA he broke up with me!!! He said the last months were awful and he doesnt want to fight anymore and thereby wishes to be single again.

It has been one month since the breakup. As I actually understood him, we have stayed friends after the breakup. Talking once a week about or lives on different continents.

I've told him that i still love him but respect his desicion. I've been on holiday with friends etc, not depressed at all. He on the other hand is still quite down, saying he is apathetic to everything. And he cries all the time when we talk. But he says that everytime he feels like he's missing me, he thinks of the bad times and thats why he sticks with his UNHAPPY desicion.

What should I do? I want him back. I love him and I hope he loves me as well. I know we could be happy in USA. No language barriers, money issues, worrying about our career etc. Just us again! But I cant convince him with words on phone! I have to show him that!

I know that if I would jump on the plane he would welcome me and kiss me and stay with me.. but I want him to ask me to come first! So he would never ever feel that i forced him into a realtionship. I know that it is important for him to feel he's the desicion maker!

Advice please!
have a beautiful day!

[ecojeanne]

i reckon a lot of people miss out by not communicating properly....why don't you ask him out straight would he like to get back together? if you truly think things could work out then maybe he hasn't the courage to ask you himself since he did the breaking up...be sure you know in your heart and soul that this would be a good decision for you....if things don't work out how does that leave you? would you be able to cope?

[Mish]

What should I do? I want him back. I love him and I hope he loves me as well. I know we could be happy in USA. No language barriers, money issues, worrying about our career etc. Just us again! But I cant convince him with words on phone! I have to show him that!

I know that if I would jump on the plane he would welcome me and kiss me and stay with me.. but I want him to ask me to come first! So he would never ever feel that i forced him into a realtionship. I know that it is important for him to feel he's the desicion maker!

Well then, it's either you want him back or you want him to be the one to give in and to ask you to come. You should probably choose which one you want more.

Personally, if there is break up I found that rarely two people ever get back together (at least in a way that lasts) and best thing is continue on with your life taking the lessons learned on board. Also I believe words like "love" should no longer be used come the break up. The feelings are in a quagmire and these words are no longer an accurate representation of these feelings.

[shh!]

He broke up with you. I'd go back to Australia if I were you. You guys weren't even getting along for a significant portion of the time you were together. This is your chance for freedom!