90% of relationships are filled with lies, deceit and jealousy

[CompletePimp]

I can't believe all this shit I read everywhere on either this forum or yahoo answers or anywhere else online! Girls and guys alike, say all this crap about them trusting their boyfriends/girlfriends yet STILL saying that don't like them going out or to pubs/clubs? What's the problem if you trust them? Alcohol is no excuse, if they are trustworthy then they won't drink so much to put themselves in a bad position. Everyone out there says they love them but snoop through their phones? How can you love when you do not trust!? Why is everyone lying to themselves on a daily basis, not to mention their partners. It's no wonder 90% of relationships don't work out!

People just want that person to themselves! They want to keep them away from "dangerous" social scenarios. As if it'll make them more loyal or love you more. They think that just because nothing physical is done that there is no emotional wandering going on. If a person will cheat they will do it regardless. Why can't people just TRUST one another? If they will break that trust then so what. Why does everyone need to stress over things they cannot control?

The old saying that a person is only as faithful as their options is NOT true! This all comes down to personal insecurities. If you cannot be happy/confident with yourself how can you be with another? Why have a fake relationship if you can't trust anyone?!

[ecojeanne]

did you have a fight with your gf?

so what you are saying is: people should trust each other full stop.

have you ever experienced deceit from a girl who you cared for or loved?

if you had you would understand that people cannot trust so easily because people have learned through the experience of life that not everyone is trustworthy and it can break hearts. people get tricked and learn from that.

trust is earned. respect and understand that.

but i do agree with you, people should respect their partners need for privacy and space and being overly suspicious will ruin the relationship.

[boobaa]

Humanity is a lie.

Live with it.

Thats what has disgusted me.

But, are you jelaus, have you been, have you told a lie, what are you thinking right now?

[Schakilla's Man]

complete pimp...did someone rip your heart out?

[Time Piece]

Oh come on! Are you jerking my chain? Trying to get a reaction out of some of us? Your kidding, right? Please tell me your kidding.

Have you never read about or watched 20/20 or what have you and seen the horror stories that occur on a regular basis? Spouses and/or significant others (BF,GF) have “trusted” their partners only to find out that their partner (in some cases lifelong partner) where planning or in some cases DID commit murder for personal gain!

I see, I’m supposed to put on the blinders and/or rose colored spectacles and just completely trust whomever I’m in a relationship with? You ever hear of STD’s such as HIV?

All it takes is that one instance where you trusted that certain someone only to find out later you have a sore on your genitals.

Or on a lesser scale but still a very lousy and hurtful situation how about someone just using you for some other type of personal gain or maybe just for monetary gain and once the well runs dry so does the partner.

I could list a bunch of other reasons but quite frankly I believe I have made my point.

You can be the most confident person in the world in a relationship with someone who is nothing more then a bald face liar and manipulator.

To quote Bluto from the movie animal house… “face it, you f**ked up, you trusted us”!

[lastwish]

lol. Where did you get your statistics?

[bluesummer]

You know, I trusted my ex husband and he cheated on me a handful of times......and it still didn't completely destroy my faith in trust. It truly is the backbone of a relationship.

I trust until trust is broken. Bottom line. After that happens though, there is slim chance of forgiveness.

[IndiReloaded]

How can you love when you do not trust!? Why is everyone lying to themselves on a daily basis, not to mention their partners. It's no wonder 90% of relationships don't work out!

If they will break that trust then so what. Why does everyone need to stress over things they cannot control?

The old saying that a person is only as faithful as their options is NOT true! This all comes down to personal insecurities.

I happen to agree with this^. I just posted in another thread:

Trust comes from YOU. Trustworthy is about the other person.

Humanity is a lie.

Live with it.

Thats what has disgusted me.

What an odd way to live, tho. Are you disgusted that the sky is blue? Or that water is wet? People do what they do, just accept it. Don't be disgusted, that will just keep you from meeting the sort of ppl you would like to attract. Personally, I find it amusing and rather predictable. There's some comfort in that, I find.

Have you never read about or watched 20/20 or what have you and seen the horror stories that occur on a regular basis? Spouses and/or significant others (BF,GF) have “trusted” their partners only to find out that their partner (in some cases lifelong partner) where planning or in some cases DID commit murder for personal gain!

I happen to think that, in most of these cases, ppl do know, instinctively, that there is a problem. They either choose to ignore it or live in denial, for reasons to do with their own pysche.

I'm not saying there aren't cases of ppl being truely blindsided, but those cases are rare & are usually done deliberately by ppl who are very skilled at manipulation. These ppl are adepts that usually have sociopathic tendencies.

Just ask anyone who's ever been cheated somehow. After a chance to reflect, they will almost always tell you there were signs that things weren't right, that they chose to ignore.

So. My advice for avoiding these types of situations is to do the following:

Learn to really look at situations, not how you'd LIKE them to be, but how they actually ARE. This requires being able to detach yourself from the emotions of a situation. Try to see things as how an outside would view your situation.

Also, listen to your gut. Its been shown that human are able to subconsciously understand situations well before our conscious mind has figured things out (for those interested, there's a book called 'Blink' that describes this).

Once you know what's really going on, THEN decide if its something that is actually good for you. Even if its a bad situation, it can often be used to one's advantage with the right mindset.

If you can do this, you are much less likely to get blindsided by the things that life will throw at you. And when it does, you will be better able to handle it.

Hope this helps.

[IndiReloaded]

You know, I trusted my ex husband and he cheated on me a handful of times......and it still didn't completely destroy my faith in trust. It truly is the backbone of a relationship.

I trust until trust is broken. Bottom line. After that happens though, there is slim chance of forgiveness.

But I bet, looking back, you knew there was a problem way before you did something about it. Or you knew but had your reasons for sticking it out as long as you did. Hope is a double-edged sword in these cases, isn't it?

[starbuck]

You have to put a certain amount of trust in all the people around you, lovers and friends alike, as well as most decisions you make. Nothing is ever "sure."

[IndiReloaded]

As Sun Tsz said, paraphrased:

Trust without intelligence is folly.

[Hollywood]

I'm partial with this. I do agree that people shouldn't stress over things that they can't control. With that being said, that doesn't mean a person should "so what" a moment of betrayal from a spouse, significant other, boyfriend, girlfriend whatever the hell you want to call them.

People with insecurities do exist. These people have low-self esteem. They tend to be envious and jealous.

Then you have The "A thief believes everyone steals. A cheater believes everyone cheats." kind of people. They always accuse you of cheating without even having a legitimate reason to believe that you are. Also, you have never given them a reason to believe that you are cheating.

You also have the people who are determined to be respected. Whether they have been cheated on before, or not, they are headstrong and some are even prideful. They don't want to be made a fool of, they don't want to be disrespected and they are overprotective of themselves.

Oh and let's not forget about You! How do you know that you haven;t done anything to trigger these thoughts in your lover? Before you start labeling check out the contents of the package. Sometimes insecurities are caused by YOU.

BTW this is just generally speaking not necessarily singling any one person out... just addressing the issue as a topic.

[Hollywood]

Oh and to the topic starter... if you are venting about your own relationship... calling yourself a CompletePimp wouldn't help your lover to trust you. FYI Only!

[agatha]

The only reason why both parties don't have the trust, its because of the INSECURITIES.

[Only-virgins]

Don't know what he said but I AGREE WITH THE TITLE.