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Thread: Guys I would really like some honest feed back

  1. #1
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    Guys I would really like some honest feed back

    At what age do you/ or would you no longer find a woman desireable?

    Is there a certain 'cut off' limit for you? For example you see a woman that you think is attractive and you are thinking of approaching but then you learn her age and you decide to back off. (Her personality is appealing and everything.) Why? (This has not happened yet as far as I know personally, but I would like to know what to expect.)

    Any particular reasons that certain ages are more appealing than others?

    I had a birthday in December and have begun pondering the aging question. I don't advertise my age but I would hate to be rejected once someone learns my age. Sometimes, if I am approached by a guy who seems young (even if I do not know his actual age) I head him off by saying "I'm too old for you." Yes, I have actually done this. He then wanted to know when I graduated high school etc. (According to him he was only 6 years younger than me, he looked younger than this to me. Who knows.) He gave me his number any way. I never did call.

    If you haven't guessed by now this (the age thing) is another one of my big insecurities.

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    Well, I'm not on the market. If I were... Probably 25 would be the youngest I'd go. By then the woman has a chance of maybe having a clue of who she is, who she wants to be, and how to get there. Instead of getting into a relationship and 5 years later deciding she doesn't like who she is, or where she is. It is merely less likely to happen.
    "Well, then," the Cat went on, "you see a dog growls when it's angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad."

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    How old are you? It makes a difference.

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    Shybelle, how old are the men you are interested in dating, anyway? And do you really WANT someone who has more in coomon with a 21 year old than you?

    I don't think your age would bethe thing that would drive men away, but your insecurities? You need to get a hold of them.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    No, I am not interested in men who are interested in 21 year olds. But most men like younger women it is just human nature I guess. Even men in there 40's and 50's often are with women in there early and mid twenties. I was just wondering if there is an age where men think maybe not. I was wondering if this is because they assume that at a certain point all women are trying to trap a man and end up with the proverbial house in the suburbs with 2.5 kids and a car in the garage.

    I thought that I could ask a question here that I would not ask anywhere else. I assumed that I could express this concern and ask what guys really think. I thought that the veil of relative anonymity would allow them to be honest. I just would like to put all of the cards (potential deal breakers) out on the table initially instead of wondering if the other shoe (i.e. rejection) will drop later. But I also know that it would seem odd to ask every person how old they are and to state your own age right off the bat. (I have been approached by a variety of ages - I will admit age is hard to gauge age unless they look very young or very old. I even had an octogenarian try to pick me up at church. He had some bible tapes he wanted me to come to his house and listen to sometime. I found out he was very old because the next Sunday it was announced that he had recently celebrated his 89th birthday. I actually thought he was in his seventies.)

    By the way I had a birthday in December and I'm 31. So Carl1222 how does my age make a difference for your reply? Please don't sugar coat your answer.

    Vashti- Thank you for your post. As crazy as it may sound I am actually trying to work through my insecurities. If you do not acknowledge it you can not deal with it. For years I have pushed things down that have bothered me and pretended that everything was fine. Now I am at least stating that this is what concerns me and you may think its neurotic or just plain pathetic and I am fine with that. But at the same time I do appreciate your feedback It helps to put things into perspective and for me not to take everything so seriously. Maybe one day I will get ahold of my insecurities, but until then I am a work in progress.

    It is even new for me to admit that I am a work in progress. I have spent my entire life trying to hold everything together and pretend that everything is OK.

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    I have had to deal with the 'age problem' as well... but more from the other end I suppose. Often I am summarily dismissed as being too immature based on my appearance and age. But I have learned to not be discouraged by this... often using this 'natural assumption' of people to throw them off guard. If they want to assume certain things about me because of something as misleading as age... so be it.. it does little to abate my ambitions and has often helped.

    If I had not been this way I would've never caught my current bf's eye. He had initially dismissed me as being 'too young' and even stated that when we first met. After he had a chance to get to know me... he realized that I did have much to offer, despite my relatively few years.

    I think you shouldn't worry so much about age or the 'cut-off point' that men have in their minds. In the end, a compatibility is far more important... and if it's there, then all else can be over-looked or accepted as a secondary/minor concern.
    "The weakest soul, knowing its own weakness, and believing this truth that strength can only be developed by effort and practice, will, thus believing, at once begin to exert itself, and, adding effort to effort, patience to patience, and strength to strength, will never cease to develop, and will at last grow divinely strong."

    - James Allen

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    It seems like it doesn't really matter how old you are - you will attract a certain segment of the population, and will repel another. ::shrug::

    I used to like 17 year old boys. Now, I can't imagine why I thought they were so sexy.

    It sounds like you worry too much about what men think of you, and not enough about what you think of them (based on your other threads).
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    in my book i think that you've got nothing to worry about.. i still think that madonna is f*cking f*ckable... and she's like 50+

    raverboy
    ...this is just my perspective on the situation...

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    I always thought guys got off on getting with older chicks, hence the whole 'milf' thing. I'm two months older than my fiance, and it's a common joke of ours that he's screwing a cougar.....in fact it almost seems like the concept excites him, at times.

    I remember one of my ex's friends dating this 31 year old when he was 21. All the guys thought it was the coolest thing in the world.
    Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. - Mohandas Gandhi

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    Quote Originally Posted by Illusional View Post
    in my book i think that you've got nothing to worry about.. i still think that madonna is f*cking f*ckable... and she's like 50+

    raverboy
    Q: Why are Madonna’s sexual inhibitions like safe nuclear power?

    A: Neither exists
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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    Quote Originally Posted by shybelle View Post
    But most men like younger women it is just human nature I guess.
    Not really. Actually, a lot of us like older women... well, those of us who enjoy long term relationships.

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    Men that like younger women tend to choose them for showing off to the boys.

    Men who like older women like a mature woman that they can see themselves with in the long run.

    Im not a guy but that is how I see it.
    ..::.*Love is giving someone the ability to break your heart but trusting them not to*.::..

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    Don't worry about age. Men are attracted to women that look good.

    Just keep yourself in shape, take a bit of pride in your appearance and you'll have absolutely no trouble keeping men interested.
    Is it burnin'? Well, f-ck, now you're learnin'.

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    Exactly, I don't care. As long as she looks good I couldn't care if she is 105. Since it is easier to look good for younger women for obvious reasons they seem to get more attraction.
    "Why are you an atheist?"
    "because I paid attention in science class."

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    Quote Originally Posted by Charlie Boy II View Post
    Don't worry about age. Men are attracted to women that look good.

    Just keep yourself in shape, take a bit of pride in your appearance and you'll have absolutely no trouble keeping men interested.

    Agrees... I'm not a guy... but if I see a beautiful woman... then age doesn't really matter...

    I have seen some very attractive 'older' women... even made me think "If I were single..."
    "The weakest soul, knowing its own weakness, and believing this truth that strength can only be developed by effort and practice, will, thus believing, at once begin to exert itself, and, adding effort to effort, patience to patience, and strength to strength, will never cease to develop, and will at last grow divinely strong."

    - James Allen

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