my marriage is crumbling

[Lite]

she is not saying "it's going to work" but i can't tell you how much better i feel that she has finally opened up to me, trusted me enough to do so and now is going willing to go to counseling with me

Well, counseling can heal a marriage, or help to hopefully amicably dissolve it where necessary for the individuals. As one friend put it to me during my divorce. Your wife could absolutely hate the color yellow. Refuse to have it anywhere near her in any form. Which, that's all good and all unless you just happen to be a canary.

[IndiReloaded]

Well, counseling can heal a marriage, or help to hopefully amicably dissolve it where necessary for the individuals.

Exactly. A lot of ppl forget the 2nd part.

As for her behaviour, again, I would suggest to raise these issues in your counselling sessions. The fact you & your wife are having problems does NOT give her a free pass to do whatever the hell she feels like. You have children, right? And responsibilities.

I would suggest you discuss in session how to negotiate for various things, which includes how often you, she or both together do things like going out.