confused.. what to do now ?

[arian29]

we two are good friends. we chat a lot over the phone. initially i thought of proposing to her, however when i did so .. she did not say no neither a yes. she told me she had a recent breakup (around 7 yrs old). i said fine.. ill be a good friend and well see how things change... maybe.. it was agreed up and i started to be a good friend of hers. my motto became .. to like bring her out of her past.. make her happy.. give her a shoulder to rest. however i always had that love thing in my heart and it did show up at times.. which kind of annoyed her at times and at times she was ok with it. Now however it seems things have changed.. seems like i need a shoulder.. well.. i am very emotional and shes a very practical and strong(emotionally) person. so things are taking a toll on me now... i kind of feel low.. if i hear from her am happy else .. well.. she stays happy.. and tries to keep her past away but now my actions seem to bother her more which is kind of depressing for me. al one thing is that i don't keep surprises.. like i always tell her what am gonna do.. unlike earlier now if i care for her.. it, kind of bothers her. i need to know what i should do to come back to form and become that good ... real good friend of hers.. again.. just dont wanna push for any other relationship as of now...

[carl1222]

You've gotten yourself into an impossible situation. She is someone with whom you want a romantic relationship, not a friendship. For her, she has a compassionate friend and nothing more. So she gets annoyed when you make romantic advances because you are spoiling the friendship (which is all she wants).

Right now, you are stuck in a one-sided relationship. In my opinion, that is the most destructive place you can possibly be in. It's not likely that you will get out of the "friend zone" any time soon, probably never. You should tell her that your feelings for her make it impossible to continue the friendship right now. If her feelings toward you change, or if your feelings toward her change, then you can be friends again ... just not right now. She'll understand.

Then comes the hard part ... breaking off all contact. It's worth it. I have friends who have gotten into your exact situation and suffered YEARS of pain because of it.

Carl.

[arian29]

are u sure.. theres no way ?