Some advice.

[Louis]

First off, Hello. This is my first time posting or even visiting the site. Thank you to the admins for making something that I needed to vent on. Heh.

So, as the subject says, I'm looking for a bit of advice. And please be as blunt and upfront as possible.

Almost 9 months ago I began to date the most amazing girl on the face of this planet. Beautiful, fun, extremely smart and into her studies. We started dating knowing that 3 months later she would have to go back to school. School is 2000+ miles away. I've never been in a long distance relationship and I've always heard horrible things about them..

Those 3 months were seriously magical. And so were the first few months she was up in school. We saw each other at least once a month whether she would come down on vacation for a weekend, or I would go up to visit her.

After like the first 5-6 months, I guess the arguments arose. I'm not going to lie, I am WELL aware that 90% of these arguments were because I'm an idiot, but I couldn't contain myself.

She was this one way before the arguments, always leaving me small comments on myspace or facebook. Always sending me adorable text messages reminding me that I was her king. Once the arguments started they slowly started disappearing.

I've brought this up, or rather, started an argument, a whole mess of times, but it's kind of tough to tell someone 'you do't leave me myspace comments' without sounding extremely childish. It always results in her telling me she has a bunch of work to do in school. I totally understand the work, but I also need that "king" feeling again.

It's gotten to a point where, now, I feel like I'm bothering her half the time I contact her. I know it isn't true, I know she wouldn't be with me if I did, in fact, bother her. But it does feel that way.

Well, in conclusion, I have to pick her up at the airport this Friday. She's coming down for Spring Break, and in reality, I AM PARANOID of her getting here and still be giving me, what seems like, the cold shoulder.

I really don't even know what I'm writing on here for. I guess just to have someone to talk to?

Anything anyone recommends I do?

I just want to be her king again.

[The_bobb]

...It's gotten to a point where, now, I feel like I'm bothering her half the time I contact her. I know it isn't true, I know she wouldn't be with me if I did, in fact, bother her...(

How do you KNOW it isn't true? I don't mean to sound pessimistic... But from what i read, you COULD be.

And honestly man, when your that far apart i don't know if i would consider you guys "with" each other. I mean, we're not talking about a quick 1-2 hour drive here.

...you do't leave me myspace comments...but I also need that "king" feeling again...I AM PARANOID of her getting here and still be giving me, what seems like, the cold shoulder... just want to be her king again. ...

These comments leave me feeling like your a little selfish in this "relationship".

What have YOU done to make HER feel like your queen? I never saw anything in your post about doing anything for her (except driving up to her). Where were YOUR myspace comments? And did they slow down after you started having your arguments as well?

[Louis]

I've spoken to her about how I feel, as far as bothering her. She tells me I don't. That's one of the main reasons I don't THINK i do. I mean, she's not the type to ever lie or hide something from me. She's pretty grown and I'm sure if I bothered her she would tell me, or end it.I just personally feel like I am, at times, calling or texting when she is busy.

I continue constantly leaving her little comments.. Texting her.. Making status updates about me missing her.. Nothing has changed on my part.. She continues being my queen, and I remind her constantly.

[IndiReloaded]

Grow up. That is all. She is busy, and while your txt comments are cute, they take a backseat to her studies.

As for what to do, just tell her in a calm moment how much you enjoy being her BF and how you understand how busy she is. That bit of consideration for her situation will get you far.

As for calling or txting while she is busy, perhaps you could arrange a schedule for such. Or Skype each other. This way, she can see you are online but will only contact you when she has the time. Likewise for you.

Oh, and you might want to consider getting a hobby or something else to do so that you GF isn't your world in this. Even a king gets boring if all he does is focus on his queen 24/7.

[Louis]

That's most likely all I needed Indi.
I understand all of that, and it's crossed my mind a ton of times. It's not that easy though.

[IndiReloaded]

Well, keep it up and you risk irritating her, or worse. You should decrease each others stress, not add to it.

At this point in your lives, distraction from her studies may force her to decide that *any* boyfriend is just too much work at this time in her life. Unless that's what you want, I suggest finding a way to reign it in.