Help Pls :"(

[justme78783]

Hey ,

Pls i d like your help in a matter of mine that is causing me a lot of frustration and insecurity )': !

I ll try to say it as briefly and better i can ( english is not my native language :/ )

Ok there is a girl that i really like ... and until now i though she liked me too ... !

Heres the case : she some months ago had a relationship with a close friend of mine ... but he dumped her because his ex came back .. ! But on the process she and i developed some feelings about each other ( at least from my side ) ,and have been hangingout for more than 3 months now ... !

I have to mention that she was jealous whenever i was speaking to other girls , or we would hung each other at every possible situation, we would speak for hours in messenger , and try to meet each other whenever possible ... ! ( and many more things like this )

Now heres where the problem starts : 2 weeks ago i decided that i should get it to the next level and i should tell to her about my feelings ... ! So as we were speakign in msn i wrote to her : Hey would you like tommorrow to go on a date with me ? There is smth that i ve gotta tell you that has to do with us ... ! If by any means you have doupts about this then pls tell me so we wont go ... ! ( I am sure that she knew what i was gonna say to her , as in the folllowing posts i made it almost clear ... )

And she replied : Oh yes sure ... ! And i kept asking if she was sure ... and she was repying yes .. !

And the day of the date arrives , and we go out to a kafeteria ( i do not know how to call it else in english ), so as we were having our drinks and we were chatting she was encouraging me to tell her how i feel by saying : Do not be hesistant , and stuff like this ... !

Then after an hour or so i told her that i really liked her and asked her if she had any feelings about me ... but she said she was very shy and in situations like this she wants her time ... !

So i said to her , listen it is truly ok if you do not want to have a relationship with me , but she replied if i didn't like you , i would have told you ... ! And said that listen let us go on a date again tomorrow ... ! And that she was going to send me via a message of how she feels ... cause she was shy ... !

Which she did not , and i thoug ok fine she does not like me , lets get over it ! And 2 days later she indirectly said to me that she did not want to have a relationship with me , cause of the wierd situation we are )

Let me explain it a little more ( she was in a relationship with a friend of mine which he dumped her for his ex , another friend of mine likes her but she wont even date with him , and her best friend likes me ) , lol i think it is kinda complicated .. .!

But as i though i should get over it she kept sending me messages via msn ...or would spend all her time sending me a lot of tracks that i like , and thigs like this ... !

3 days ago , she send me a message invinting me to go to her home and my friend also ( the one that likes her , but she wont even date him ) , and there were some mutual friends also ... ! And as we were preparing to leave she said to me to stay which i did , but the guy that likes her heard that and stayed too .... pfffffffff so i could not do anyting ... or talk with her about this mater .. !


So the following day i send her a message where i said to her i ve got 2 tickets for the cinema , and i askd her if she wants to come with me , and after that have a drink somewhere else .. and her reply was this :

Hey hun , how are ya doing ? Ok , i will come , besides there has been a long time since we havent seen any movie !

So i thought it s all ok , but the next day 2 hours before the movie started she sent me a message where she said she would not come because she was at her uncle and was very tired ( smthng like this ), andthat we could arrange any other day i wanted ... !


Now she is sending to me messages and i am not talkative and i just find excuses to avoid seeing her , cause i am fed up ... do not know what to do ... i really like her , but i think se is fooling me aroud , o maybe not , i do not knowwwwwww

I just want to know what your opinion ? plssssssss :'( ! What should i do ? why is she doing this to me ? Does she like me or not ?

Is she playing hard to get, or fooling me around ... so she can make her ex jealous ?


What is your opinion, what should i do ? Pls any advice ? Thank you in advance ): !

[justme78783]

P.S when i told he how i feel she then told me about her ex ... ! That he ws very harh with her , and basically started to talk about the fat that he was a jerk ... !

What does this mean ?

I mean i was saying to her how i feel and minutes later started to talk about her ex ... !

pffffffffff ! I truly would never attemp to get it to the next level , if she hadn't gave me soooooooo many signs ... ! I am truly confused ...

[carl1222]

Your English is not perfect but understandable.

It sounds like she's shy (cultural thing?)

She is practically begging you to take the lead ... so she is definitely interested.

You told her how you feel ... she immediately told you why she is no longer interested in her ex boyfriend. That's good!

Why do you think she is "fooling you around"??? I don't see that at all!!!

Carl.

[justme78783]

Your English is not perfect but understandable.

It sounds like she's shy (cultural thing?)

She is practically begging you to take the lead ... so she is definitely interested.

You told her how you feel ... she immediately told you why she is no longer interested in her ex boyfriend. That's good!

Why do you think she is "fooling you around"??? I don't see that at all!!!

Carl.

Thanx for your reply carl , i am telling this cause after i said to her how i feel , 2 days later in a msn messenger she said indirectly that she does not want to get it to the next level in a way like this : You see ? this is why it is so difficult for us to be together !

Or she cacelled the date ... basically you might have right and my insecurity is ruining it all :/

What shoud i do you think ? Pls carl tell me ! I will try to speak to her tommorrow as soon as possible !

[carl1222]

OK ... explain as best you can what she meant by "You see ? this is why it is so difficult for us to be together!" Curiosity ... Chinese?

Carl.

[Sixpacj]

"That he ws very harh with her , and basically started to talk about the fat that he was a jerk" what does it mean?

It means she is telling you indirectly what men she is attracted to. JERKS! ;-) In other words, check out the thread:

[url]http://www.loveforum.net/ask-female-forum/28660-why-do-guys-who-fight-all-time-get-hott-girlfriends.html[/url]

[justme78783]

OK ... explain as best you can what she meant by "You see ? this is why it is so difficult for us to be together!" Curiosity ... Chinese?

Carl.

Ok i ll try to : 2 days later after i told her how i feel , there was a missunderstanting betwwen the guy that likes her ( but she wont even date him ) , and her ex boyfriend , because the guy that likes her is obssesed with her ... ! And while we were talking in msn about this ... and pretending that nothing really happened ... then she told me a phrase like this : You see know why it is so difficult for us to be 2gether ?

And then i told her that you should not have said this at all , as i understood that you do not want anything more than friendship from me ... and basically that it just had to do more with me , that i just needed to do it , and now i feel different ... !

She then said : Did i do anything that angered you ? pffffffff !

and i replied to her : No not all ! But from now on i ll be more cautius with you ... cause you behave differently and think differently .


Ok so a week passed , and she invited me to go to her place, to have a drink ... !Me and some other friends ... ! The whole time there she was finding excuses to hug me .. or she even kissed me ( not in lips ) , and when we were preparing to go , she said to me , pls stay ... !

Which i did , but the guys that is obsessed with her stayed too cause he was jealous ... pffffffffffffffffff ! And i could not at least talk t her about this matter .

So i thought with myself its ok she probably wants smth more than a friendship and i decided 4 days ago to invite her to go to a cinema and after this for a drink ... !

She replied 20 minutes later and said that she would come ... ! But the next day 2 hours before i d pick her up with my car from her place ... she said to me that she had been at her uncle and she just came home ... ! So she said to me that she could not and said that we could arrange any other day i wanted ( which i believe she would find again an excuse to avoid our meeting )

I hope this is kinda more comprehensive ... And 1 hour ago she said to me if i wanted to go to a club this thursday ... both of us and whoever else wants from our friends ... ! Which i sad yes ... but i just believe she is doing this just to show me that she likes me ( but in fact my insticts tell that she does not ) , i will go there just from curiosity ... !

I mean she might have 'some' feelings about me , but i think she is obsessed with her ex ... and is using me to make him jealous ? I d not know ... !

But even my friends that i never had told them anything about my feelings about her , when we were all together all said that they believed on the process me and she would have a realtionship ... and they all both agreed .. !


So basically i am very confused and at this present moment very insecure .. !

[justme78783]

"That he ws very harh with her , and basically started to talk about the fat that he was a jerk" what does it mean?

It means she is telling you indirectly what men she is attracted to. JERKS! ;-) In other words, check out the thread:

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I do not think so my friend , in fact i am so confused this moment that i do not know ... but from what i can remember this was not the case ... !
She was saying to me that her ex never said to her anyting kind , that he wanted him only for sex and stuff like this ...

[jadelil25]

It sounds like she is just shy and she wants you to take the lead because she is too scared to.

The other reason that she may feel a bit uncomftable is because she went out with a close friend of yours and she is worried about messing that up/causing arguments between you.

I think you should go for it as long as you know your friend will be ok with it as well.

[justme78783]

It sounds like she is just shy and she wants you to take the lead because she is too scared to.

The other reason that she may feel a bit uncomftable is because she went out with a close friend of yours and she is worried about messing that up/causing arguments between you.

I think you should go for it as long as you know your friend will be ok with it as well.

Thanx for your reply jadeli ! Hmm do not know , there are some other explanations too .... !

1)She might be in love with her ex and is afraid that if she does anyting with me he will never return back ...
2) She likes the attention she gets from me ...
3) Recelty i ve toticed some things ... that are kinda wierd ! I think her best friend likes me and she does not want to do anyting with me cause she is afriad that she ll ruin her friendship ... !

Do not know :/ , i am so fed up with the whole situation ... time will tell !!!