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Thread: Separation normal?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
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    Separation normal?

    I'm dating this girl who is 16 and Im 18. We see each other almost everyday for numerous hours. This has been going on for 6 months but recently she said she misses being with her friends. I guess since we started going out she hasn't seen them much and she said she wanted to take a couple weeks off to herself. I've seen her a couple times since then and only a few minutes but its killing me. I asked her if we are still going out and she said yes and no. She can't consider us going out because she would want to spend time with me and not others. Is it normal to take a couple weeks off for yourself.

    She told me no she would not be looking for other guys to go out with and I believe her. After those two weeks are up we would continue to see each other normally again. I keep in mind she is 16 and younger than most and spending time alone would be good...but is that long of a time normal once again?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
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    39
    No, i dont think its normal she can still be with you and be with her friend
    I say show her that you can have with your friend too, go out and have some fun.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
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    2
    I ask If I can come along but she says she would want to talk to me and feel bad if she talked to others If I am there. She also says that her friends wouldn't get along with me and maybe she is right...but I would still like to try to get along with them. How can I make her see this?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Singapore
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    519
    Don't force it on her. It's ok for each of you to have your own circle of friends. Though it would be nice if you could have common friends. Just tell her this. And you should introduce her to your friends too if you haven't already done so. Do for her what you want her to do for you.
    Clarity of mind means clarity of passion too; this is why a great and clear mind loves ardently and sees distinctly what it loves. -- Blaise Pascal (1623 - 1662)

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    under the stairs
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    I think it's fair enough for her to want two weeks to herself. If you two are seeing each other for so long each day that she doesn't have any time to herself or time to spend with friends, that's just too much, I think you need to cut down on the amount of time you do spend together.

    She needs time to herself, and she needs time with her own friends, and if you cut down a bit on the time you spend together then when you are actually together it will seem even more special.

    GBRaul is right, dont force anything on her, never pressure her into something she obviously doesnt want to do - if she doesnt want you to meet her friends then you just gotta deal with that, but it might be nice for her to meet your friends - only if she is comfortable with that though. She will appreciate you for being so understanding.
    "When I was 4 years old, they tried to test my IQ.
    They showed me this picture of 3 oranges and a
    pear. They asked me which one was different and
    did not belong. They taught me different was
    wrong."
    - Ani DiFranco -

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    84
    I agree with KirstyM, its not about the length of time its about quality time! Im in a similar situation and have decided to give my g/f the space she wants and that has helped, but if i where you i would worry about her not wanting to meet your friends. Its probabily just her age but in my experience that can cause difficulties later. As mentioned before giver her the time she wants, try and not let it get at you, and go out with your mates.

    Good luck

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