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Thread: Relationship with girl - help needed!

  1. #16
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    6
    i unfortnatly did ask her out via text (i was getting so sick/feeling faint with nerves) that it was the only thing i could do at the time.

    I got a text message back (didnt know what it means, but it deffo doesnt say yes/no) and the text messages had turned into chat about a friends partner just died.

    I went into work today, i know if may sound stupid but i feel like alot of weight has been lifted off my chest and i can actually speak to her now, but i agree with the comments above and will say "look - are you dating anyone? Because if not, I'd like to take you out." or similar to confirm it....

    i got a gut feeling it will be a no now... but well see!

  2. #17
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    3,933
    Quote Originally Posted by josha View Post
    i unfortnatly did ask her out via text (i was getting so sick/feeling faint with nerves) that it was the only thing i could do at the time.

    I got a text message back (didnt know what it means, but it deffo doesnt say yes/no) and the text messages had turned into chat about a friends partner just died.

    I went into work today, i know if may sound stupid but i feel like alot of weight has been lifted off my chest and i can actually speak to her now, but i agree with the comments above and will say "look - are you dating anyone? Because if not, I'd like to take you out." or similar to confirm it....

    i got a gut feeling it will be a no now... but well see!
    Stop being so negative. Start being more positive. Women will notice when you aren't confident in yourself and they will lose attraction for you.
    I don't chase, I replace.

  3. #18
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    46
    Quote Originally Posted by josha View Post
    i unfortnatly did ask her out via text (i was getting so sick/feeling faint with nerves) that it was the only thing i could do at the time.

    I got a text message back (didnt know what it means, but it deffo doesnt say yes/no) and the text messages had turned into chat about a friends partner just died.

    I went into work today, i know if may sound stupid but i feel like alot of weight has been lifted off my chest and i can actually speak to her now, but i agree with the comments above and will say "look - are you dating anyone? Because if not, I'd like to take you out." or similar to confirm it....

    i got a gut feeling it will be a no now... but well see!
    When a girl doesn't give you a direct answer when you ask her out (even via text message), here's the translation:

    "No, I don't want to go out with you but I don't want to hurt your feelings."

    Maybe if you asked her out in person it would of been different. but you failed here.

    I guess you can still try.

    BUT I think you should let it go. Trust me, there's no point obsessing over this ONE girl.

  4. #19
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    6
    I been chatting to her friend most nights about it and basically today via Instant messenger asked her, and the result was "im in a relationship at the mo" which i knew she just started, im just happy to get it off my chest and have a answer and now move on, all though it would of been nice to be with her, these things are not ment to be!

    With regards to my first post about the signals like "ask her to come for tea, what would u do if X asked you out and i think josha and X would make a nice couple" the friend cant remember saying it and no words was exchanged with the girl about me.

    - now i can be the real me (and maybe u never know in the future)

    cheers for all the help.

  5. #20
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    1,696
    Quote Originally Posted by josha View Post
    I been chatting to her friend most nights about it and basically today via Instant messenger asked her, and the result was "im in a relationship at the mo" which i knew she just started, im just happy to get it off my chest and have a answer and now move on, although it would of been nice to be with her, these things are not meant to be!

    With regards to my first post about the signals like "ask her to come for tea, what would u do if X asked you out and i think josha and X would make a nice couple" the friend cant remember saying it and no words was exchanged with the girl about me.

    - now i can be the real me (and maybe u never know in the future)

    cheers for all the help.

    You are not going to get any benefit from this experience as long as you think this way (see bold). Things don't happen because they are "meant to be" josha, things happen because you MAKE them happen. This is true in all aspects of life, including romance.

    The fact that she found someone else she likes is the direct result of your hesitance. Chances are fleeting, and can easily pass you by while you are agonizing over how to pursue them. You have to learn to strike while the iron is hot, or it will cool on its own accord while you wait.

    You should be kicking yourself in the ass, josha so next time inactivity will be more uncomfortable to you than taking a risk.

    Good luck.

    Carl.

  6. #21
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    12
    Carl has some points, but I say kudos to you for actually being able to get the courage to ask her about it. It'll be more easier as you do it more often. Keep up the improvement and you'll have yourself a lady soon!

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