Why am I feeling this way? Going crazy

[Jason114]

Once again I was dumped by my ex and it seems like this is the last time. We havent spoke in 2 weeks and she said some real hurtful things to me last time we did speak. She told me that she loves me and will do anything for me but shes not crazy in love with me...what exactly does that mean? Well, these past 2 weeks I havent been able to sleep much, i dream about her every night, and I feel really depressed.

Now that I have had 2 weeks to reflect on my relationship I noticed that because I loved and cared for her so much I put up with alot of abuse. I was stressed out every day while I was with her, she would verbally abuse me, she would damage my property during an argument and she also would hit me in my face during arguments, she even gave me two black eyes. I guess I put up with it because she was so good at arguing, I'm not a confrontational person so I'm not really good at the whole arguing thing but she was really good at twisting things on me when she was in the wrong and by the end of the convo she would have me apoligzing.

Despite the abuse, lies, and mind games for some reason I love her more than anything. I've been in a few serious relationships before and were very fond of a few ex's but I didnt have nearly as much feelings for anyone else like I do for her. The thing that really bugs me now is I am so stress free without her but I'm also depressed with out her. Why is this? I was so miserable and treated badly in the relationship but now I'm so depressed and hurt over not being with her. My mind is all over the place rite now and I sometimes just break down, I dream that we make up and than when I wake up from it I cant fall back asleep and I hurt so bad. I stay active, I work, go to the gym, play sports, have and active nitelife and good friends, but I still cant shake it. I've been purposely avoiding nite spots shes at because I cant see her without breaking down. I just dont know what to do...

[Gigabitch]

Two weeks is not long enough to break the habit. Give it some more time. You will feel better.

[s_b]

"I dream that we make up"...but you wake up before you get to the real ending of that dream, where 2 weeks later she's hitting you again, giving you a bellyaches of stress and robbing you of your self-esteem.

Follow Giga's advice - it's for the best.

[Lonely Island]

If a woman can hit like a man
Then she can take a hit like a man

No way in hell would I let her do all that...Your a doormat...she is the door

My advice is to leave her

[Jason114]

I didnt really think much of it at the time because I always figured shes just a girl but in all reality I was getting marks on my face and black eyes.

I dunno, I've been avoiding places where she goes and I havent called her but I'm not going to lie I am miserable without her and the thought of her with someone else is sickening... It would be nice to find someone else to take her off my mind but I dont wana just use someone for my own good, the next girl I get with I am making sure is a good person.