Hlp me please!!!

[jbr666]

I just split with my partner of 18 months last night. We'd been living together for a year. She'd been driving me nuts with her critisism and inane chatter for the last few months. We both said some stuff in the heat of the fight last night that we shouldn't, I am probably more guilty of that than her to be fair. A lot of things about the relationship were great, but I've been feeling lately that it just wasn't such a good fit. I felt she didn't respect me, and she's one of those people who always has to be the centre of attention, it was like hanging out with a kid sometimes. I'm 33 she's 25.

Thing is, now it's done and we've both calmed down (started communicating via txt msg like adults instead of children in a tantrum) I can't help feeling this urge to try to reconcile!!!!!!!

I guess it's partly because I can see the crap I have to go through in the next few months... i.e. getting back out and building a life for myself again (I'm not a particularly social person), finding someplace new to live. I'll miss our cosy evenings together, I'll really miss all that boundless affection (but I won't miss her endless rants about socialism and trades unions lol) .I'll have to mourn for that bright future I had planned for us and all that other BS that goes with the territory.

I just wish I didn't feel this desire to make up!!!!!!!!!!

Is it natural, or do you maybe think I might be making a mistake???

[Primo]

jbr, take a look around the board. Pretty much every thread is about going back 'n forth or asking how they can get someone back. It's human nature, we like to take a beating and completely run something into the ground to make sure we've killed it instead of leaving it to die with dignity.

I applaud the people (so few in number they are) that have the strength to walk away from something that's broken. Yes, there's sleepless nights, a few tears and lots of beating yourself up mentally, but that's a part of moving on. Life isn't about going backwards.

[jbr666]

As the day wears on, it's getting harder and harder. I am facing the future alone and it scares me quite a bit. Before, if I knew she was going to be out or coming home late I'd be glad of the peace and quiet. Now I am terrified of never being held by, or holding her again..... what the hell is the matter with me??

[Primo]

Nothing's wrong with you, everyone's been there. What you feel is normal and you just had a blowout, so you feel worse.

Give a few days space and you two should talk again. There's a reason you feel like it wasn't a good fit and you were fighting. Those reasons will resurface again unless there's something that can be repaired.

Just 'trying' to make it work again will fail if there's not something specific that can be repaired. A love relationship isn't about alot of work to try and tolerate each other, that's called a bad relationship.