advice please...still so sad

[spaceboy409]

Im just so confused and upset.

Its been more than 2 months since me and my ex girlfriend broke up.

and Im still just so sad about it, I think about her all the time, I stumble upon her myspace, and her status is always 'so happy' , 'stoked on life' , always something good.

I guess I just dont understand how she can be so happy, and im still so miserable :/

I know everyone says you need to meet someone new, and you will get over it, Im just not interested in anyone else, and I miss everything about my ex girlfriend.

We dont talk, and im pretty sure she wishes I fall off the face of the earth. I dont know how I can still love someone so much that hurt me so bad.

You would think I would hate her, and want to move on, but its the opposite. I keep wishing so much that she will come back to me again, but I know it probaly wont happen.

I recently had to move back home to a small town, and I hate it here. I dont really do anything but work, so I have a lot of time to think and just be depressed.

Everyone on here always says to keep yourself busy, go out and do stuff, but how can you do that when you feel so depressed, Ive tried to go out and do stuff and it doesnt help. It seems like nothing helps.

The only thing that keeps me going is thinking about moving back to the city, where I lived for 6 years, and where my ex girlfriend is.

I know when I get back, and I cant try to contact her, and I have to just find a new life without her.

But my question is, do you think ill just be a sad wreck the whole 2-3 months that im here? before I move back to the city?

all my friends, and my life pretty much is there.

Is this time alone, and close to my parents good for me? or should I go back sooner, and get back to living and going out? or is idle time without alot of social good?

sorry alot of questions in one.

also, I dont drink anymore, and havent for a month.

[RonHH]

Hi, I know your pain. Her status of showing her being happy is the environment she is making for herself.. As you should to. It's not a fix-all but it does help if you start to think positive. It seams like it took me forever to get over my ex and nothing helps like friends and family in my case. But you have to show a positive outlook, the girls out there shure don't want to hook up with someones problems. And your friends will understand if your down for a while and they may even come up with some ideas to help.
I'm hoping the best for you, and work on that smile

[crossxmyxheart]

dont be sad.. shes obviously gotten over you, the best thing to do right now is to try and start hating her... yes hating her.... as in when your friends bring her up or you hear her name.. your response should be "f%&& that b****" dont worry youll feel better.. just give it time.

[dandoe123]

why did you guys break up?

[DADGAD]

Take this time to be there for yourself and to find yourself before you move back to the city. Think of the time until you move as an opportunity.

It seems to me that you're struggling to make yourself happy. This is something I'm currently going through as well. While away from the city, learn to make yourself happy and to not rely on that other person (in this case your girlfriend) for comfort.

Whenever you have the chance, get out and do things with friends or family. It might not seem like it's helping, but it will in the long run. And although it might not seem like it's helping, getting out will help a ton more than sitting around grieving. Even if it's something small, getting out is how you can start being there for yourself and making yourself happy. Even if you're depressed when you go out... keep doing it.

Also, don't get caught up in the "what ifs" or "whys." As someone with bad anxiety, I know how damaging this is. You're never going to come up with a solution, and thinking about all of that will destroy you and your healing process. Something that might help is deleting your Myspace and trying to avoid any contact you can with her. The more you think about her, the worse you're going to feel and the longer it's going to take for you to get better.

Most importantly, know that it's going to take some work and time for you to get better. As you've already realized, it's not going to happen over night. The more effort you put into thinking for yourself, being with loved ones, and not worrying about her, the sooner you'll get better. Whether you believe me or not, you are in control of how soon you get better.

You say you think about her all the time. Well, it's time to start thinking about yourself.