i love her but she makes me angry

[kenny12]

hi,

i have a girlfriend. i love her but she keeps making me angry. i'm usually a nice and gentle person, but after i started dating her, i get angry very often. being with her has turned me into an ugly person whom i hate.

whether intentional or not, her action or speech spites me and i explode into swearing vulgarities and using hurtful words. it ruins my day and gives me a bad mood. i feel bad hurting her.

i can't seem to control my anger. i want to be nicer to her, and be the good kind person i really am. but she is "highly efficient" in turning me into a fiery monster. i want to be with her more often, but i often get angry and frustrated when i am with her. to avoid blowing up, i even resort to minimising our contact. in the long run, this is not good to the relationship.

what can i do ?

[Bumble_bee]

what is it that she does to make you so angry?

[yan]

maybe she's just trying your patience?

[kenny12]

what is it that she does to make you so angry?

she farts a lot. she talks fast and spits saliva all over me when she speaks to me. i'm a clean freak and absolutely abhor her personal hygiene habits.

she owns a pet dog which follows her around and is trained to bite at any guy she has issue with. i can't be near her because the dog is well trained and being old, is confused at its owner's mixed signals. this is a serious issue affecting our intimacy

[kenny12]

maybe she's just trying your patience?

i never thought abt it till you mentioned. what makes you say so ? care to share ?

[Primo]

she farts a lot. she talks fast and spits saliva
she owns a pet dog which follows her around and is trained to bite at any guy she has issue with

Can I have her number when you two breakup?

Seriously though, some personalities just don't mesh...there may be some physical chemsitry, but that will burn itself out when there's so much general discord. Find someone you actually get along with for starters...

[doppelgaenger]

she farts a lot. she talks fast and spits saliva all over me when she speaks to me. i'm a clean freak and absolutely abhor her personal hygiene habits.

That made my day reading.

[Heratriumphant]

Ok, assuming for the moment that this is serious...

Just go ahead and end it now. Different hygiene standards is one of those issue that just can not be fixed, you can get a pigpen to shape up for a short period of time but it will always end with resentment and backsliding.

As for your anger issues, you really need to own the fact that you are choosing to act that way. It has little to nothing to do with your GF.

Cursing, insulting and being abusive is a choice, and a poor one.

[qwertz]

lol...sorry but LOL!!!

[kenny12]

Ok, assuming for the moment that this is serious...

Just go ahead and end it now. Different hygiene standards is one of those issue that just can not be fixed, you can get a pigpen to shape up for a short period of time but it will always end with resentment and backsliding.

As for your anger issues, you really need to own the fact that you are choosing to act that way. It has little to nothing to do with your GF.

Cursing, insulting and being abusive is a choice, and a poor one.

anger is a result. if there is no cause, there is no result.

yes, i agree the way the result manifests itself lies with me. however, she could help a lot by not being part of the cause. for a relationship to work, both must take responsibility to not provoke or sow seeds of discord and distrust with our actions and words.

she has this 'best friend' whom she abets to come in between us. the more this friend intervenes, the more angry i am, distrustful of her and turned off towards her. she really has her best friend to thank for all that has happened between us. this best friend was her ex who left her in a mess. she had such a hard time recovering and now she has again allowed the ex to ruin her. isn't she a dumb woman or what ? if she really cherishes everything we have, why would she allow that ? the conclusion i draw, therefore, is that she is playing and not serious.

after what happened recently, i won't say i feel the same way towards her as before now. she is just one dumb woman who doesn't know what she wants. she is plain lonely and craves attention from all who are stupid enough to listen to her. how many back-ups does she have at this moment ? well, i know she has one - her best friend aka the pet dog. both of them like to put up shows in front of me. when you play games too often, people don't trust you anymore.

this is one person who doesn't cherish what she has.

[Nice Lover Boy]

seems like you and your GF have lots to talk about and agree on. First, its never a good idea for her to have her EX as her "Best Friend".
Its just an excuse for her to leave the door open for her ex as a rebound.
If you love her so much, shouldn't it just be you and her? Isn't that what you want? You have to talk to her.
2nd, if she cant agree at all, find another gf before your veins pop.

[kenny12]

this gf and her ex cheated on each other. they belong to the same kind of species of worms and snakes. after her ex came in to sabotage us, he disappeared after the damage is done.

i feel disgusted seeing both of them. my impression of my (now-ex) gf is marred to a big extent by the presence of her ex. without the ex beside her, she is probably someone i wld like in the long term. unfortunately she had to let the worm stick so closely to her that its stench and dirt spilled over to her.