Hapenning again...

[dipuc cupid]

If anyone has seen my previous posts from about 3 months ago then you would know that my girlfriend had a phase of being fascinated with my past.

It had all been forgotten about and the other day we went to the park because it was a nice day. We were talking and something got brought up again about one of my ex's which i don't like talking about because why should we talk about the past, shouldn't we just carry on with us and our future?

It's as though she's interrogating me about something that doesn't matter... Also, it's a past experience and that's what makes us, us, am i right? so she likes the person i've become from the life i had before her.
It's as though she wants to find something that i will "slip" up on because she doesn't think i'm telling the truth because my story changes supposedly, i've told her that i don't go into detail the first time it's brought up and this makes her think that i'm completely lying to her, which i'm not lying at all.

She's obsessed with wanting to know the finest details. She claims she's not bothered about what actually happened, just that it seems as though i'm changing my story but she promised she wouldn't bring it up again ( so it wouldn't seem as though i'm changing the story if she didn't bring it up, which would then prevent me from going into more detail about it).

Can anyone see who is in the wrong and how to sort this out?

It's really getting me down

[sehvral]

I have a very simple don't ask, don't tell policy. I don't ask about her exes, and I don't talk to her about mine. I have no idea how many guys my GF has dated, who they were, or what happened. And I don't want to know. All she knows about my exes is that one went crazy and attacked me with a knife (when she asked about my scars).

I don't know anything about the past thread, but my policy would be to just flat-out say "I'm done talking about my exes" and stick to it. She won't be happy about it, but it will end the cycle one way or another (she'll either accept it and move on, or she'll leave, that's the gamble).

[Incognito]

I'll second sehvral's advice. I realize that you don't want to be harsh with her because you won't want to hurt or lose her. However, no one can change the past. You need to tell her that. She would only need to know details that affect the present (ie diseases, past children, experiences that make you question your sexuality). Anything else is her being nosey and trying to create a lie where there might not be one. My question would be, "what EXACTLY are you looking for, what EXACTLY will this accomplish?". She is obviously prodding for something. Find out what it is. If she's one of those people who simply cannot accept that you had past relationships though you need to tell her to either get over it or get lost.

[Gigabitch]

That sucks. Any woman who actually wants to hear the fine details of your sexual past is MENTAL.

[lilly1185]

That sucks. Any woman who actually wants to hear the fine details of your sexual past is MENTAL.

I agree, although she could just be really insecure. And highly unstable.

You have two options.
Hound the **** out of her about her past with exes, like. Ask EVERY annoying detail to what colour his tooth caps were.

Or, the next time she brings it up say "I'm uncomfortable with this conversation. If you keep it up, I'm going to have to end it all together."

[girl68]

Obviously you need to be more harsh.

[Gigabitch]

You could really teach her a lesson and tell her everything. I mean everything.

[JasonVoorhees]

I never understood why you should hide you're past from your GF or viceversa, I told everything my girlfriend about my past, to all details , same she did , from the first few months we were together. it never effected our relationship and we've been 4years and a half together know our pasts. Maybe im Mental then and so is my girlfriend, but i prefer to be mental then :p

[sehvral]

You don't have to hide it, per se. But you also don't have to go into the fine details about it.

[dono01]

Ask her how this is beneficial for any of you in any way, and when she truly can't come up with a good answer, just say "your mamma"

No, that's immature.

But seriously, ask her how why it's good for either of you to talk about. She seems like she just is needing some reassurance. Some girls need to be constantly told the same thing. It's kind of like their short term memory is gone.

[Incognito]

Ask her how this is beneficial for any of you in any way, and when she truly can't come up with a good answer, just say "your mamma"

No, that's immature.

But seriously, ask her how why it's good for either of you to talk about. She seems like she just is needing some reassurance. Some girls need to be constantly told the same thing. It's kind of like their short term memory is gone.

Your mamma? LMAO!

I also know guys who seem to have short term memory loss. I don't think its something that only women suffer from.