Need a little help here

[ricerocket1]

well im back, actually im doing better now that before (7 months) recently i just been doing my thing, traveling, school, work. my little dilemma happened yesterday. i just got back from vegas over the weekend with some of her guy friends, they invited me so i went. so as soon as the facebook pictures surfaces i got a text message from her stating that "you can hang out with my friends but you can't talk to me why is that" i ignore that message and she hit me with "i need to talk to you please" so i finally gave in, and well im not going to bore you with the details it pretty much went like this:

- why won't you talk to me - my answer was you got a boyfriend, and im not over you
- i don't want any awkwardness between you and i when we hang out - my answer was it'll never going to happen
- who's your gf now, i saw all this girls on your facebook - none i don't call it dating

finally as i was leaving she blurted out "i didn't leave you for him. so you know" that's the part that got me mad, i don't know why she even said that so i told her calmly that there's going to be a time and place where we can talk about what went wrong between you and i, now is not the time and i just left.

my question to you guys is what the hell is wrong with this girl? what does she want from me?

[cmacattack1]

She likes to know that you will always be there for her as she is unsure about her current situation. And has been unsure for a while, this isn't the first time she's contacted you out of the blue. Your honesty is appreciated but telling her you aren't still over her could work against you. Knowing that you still care about her, she is more likely to try and exploit that weakness by keeping in contact with you whenever she feels like it. I mean, you aren't telling her to flat out leave you alone, so she probably doesn't even realize that what she is doing. Hence the source of your frustration...

[soulsurvivor23]

If there's one thing that bothers me about women, that's it.... She has a bf and yet at the same time feels like she has a right to complain or comment about whatever girl your seeing with, talking to, or even just having fun with. My ex a few weeks back told me she was hurt by me talking to my previous ex and i'm like wtf you have a bf I can talk to whomever I please...

Anyways back on topic... that last little line she used is classic. If you haven't really been talking or paying attention to her she fears that you are starting to get emotioinally detached. And that last line she threw in there sparked an emotional response out of you, even if it's a bad one it tugged at your emotions which is exactly what she wanted. Don't buy into it. Don't even make excuses about who you are talking to or what you're doing. Let her know that she didn't want you anymore she wants the other dude so that immediately means that she has no say and that you won't be waiting around for her to come back. Yes I know that won't be true since you stiill have feelings for her, but regardless you can't let her know that.

[ricerocket1]

thanks for the reply guys, it just seems like when things start to look up for me it seems like she's always there to either bring me down or just shows up out of nowhere. this isn't the first time she'd done this. also she has the audacity to tell me that "thanks for wishing me happy birthday"..and it seems like when we do have a conversation it seems like im not sure of what to do anymore

[girl68]

Because the mintue you move on for real is the minute she feels like she is just a little bit more worthless. When a guy is dwelling over you it's flattering. When a guy gets over you, it crushes you (even if you never want to date him). So basically she keeps coming back the second she thinks you might truely forget her. That's the why...

But you can't control her what you can control is yourself. And I think you handeled that great. Stand your ground. You're not buddy, buddy so don't pretend to be. And you're right you never will be. That's the chance you take when you break up. You BREAK up. So, don't let her little mind games get you. Move on as you need to- without her.

[Gigabitch]

I think it's good that she keeps reminding you why she was a huge pain in the ass and a waste of time.

[mey]

Hi,
I really admire, how you have managed the awkward situation
(and it gives me hope, that sometime I will be able to behave in a similar way )

[ricerocket1]

just a quick update here, im doing a lot better now, i guess once all the feelings goes and settled that i get my mind straight, to all those that just recently going through the break up i just want you to know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and it will be for the better. you will re discover yourself how a good person you are inside and out.