Rubbing it in???

[QueenofCorona]

Save his emails, texts, voicemails.. all of them. I don't know the exact content of all them or if they are considered threatening but it does sound like text book harassment. Reply back with this only: "These messages stop now. All are being saved as proof for when I go to file a restraining order which happens if you contact me again." Do that in writing of some sort so he can't say he never has warning. If you threaten it, follow through with it.

End of story. I have zero tolerance for a father acting so disgusting. There are no excuses.

[LouisianaLady29]

You want to know why he's calling??????

He wants some money for blow! You seriously, SERIOUSLY need to go to an AlAnon support group (it's AA for those affected by an addict).

Addicts manipulate the people they are in relationships with. They are selfish, illogical and greedy.

All he wants from you is to 'see his kid'... nope, he wants some drug money. He'll do or say whatever it takes to get in, and once you give he'll just keep on taking. I've been through this before, an addict honestly almost has a split personality. They become a different person when tweaked or looking for a fix.

Been there, done that, go learn about it so you know how to keep this leech off of you. I was there, you become an addict yourself. The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. Yours is enabling this retards behavior.

Thank you and I will do some research on the AlAnon support groups in my area if there are any. But question how am I enabling him if I am not answering his calls or giving him money. The last text I sent to him told him I wasn't going to give him anything and to stay away from me and don't call me or text me, to which he replied OK. Then 20 mins later he txt saying I was gonna give your money back by the end of the night and then take you out to eat so that we can talk but you are tripping still. To which I did not respond at all and have not since. He called last night like ten times and didn't txt or leave vm and I didn't answer or call back. So hopefully that is the end of it. Not answering will make him realize he needs to try and find another sucker and go away right?

[Cosmo]

Not answering is a great start. But you can't even answer and tell him to leave you alone or text back to tell him to stop texting you. Replying makes him think you are available to him which in a sense is enabling him.

You really aren't enabling, in the traditional sense anyways. Restraining order and change your numbers if you have to. It seems like you've taken the right steps thus far.

[IndiReloaded]

Save his emails, texts, voicemails.. all of them. I don't know the exact content of all them or if they are considered threatening but it does sound like text book harassment. Reply back with this only: "These messages stop now. All are being saved as proof for when I go to file a restraining order which happens if you contact me again." Do that in writing of some sort so he can't say he never has warning. If you threaten it, follow through with it.

End of story. I have zero tolerance for a father acting so disgusting. There are no excuses.

I agree with Queen's post except don't tell him you are saving the messages for proof. It could incite him to do something crazy. Tell him not to contact you again & if he does, go to the police.

Good luck.

[LouisianaLady29]

Not answering is a great start. But you can't even answer and tell him to leave you alone or text back to tell him to stop texting you. Replying makes him think you are available to him which in a sense is enabling him.

You really aren't enabling, in the traditional sense anyways. Restraining order and change your numbers if you have to. It seems like you've taken the right steps thus far.

Thank you so much Cosmo for clarifying. I'm still ignoring him. He text me a little ago asking me for 100.00 and saying he would give me the money back at the end of the night. Nothing about how is our child, how are you? That HE has something for the baby, just can I borrow money. Never mind that I dumped you for another girl, got her pg and claim her child while denying yours even after the embarrassment of a state administered DNA test proving our kids his for the sake of filing support against him, never mind that I called you a broke b**** and our own child derogatory names, just give me 100.00. Please reward me for being an a**hole deadbeat and we will be friends. It was so hard not to say anything back but I don't want to be an enabler or nuts like him so again he gets and got NO response, after I change my # on Monday I just hope he goes away.

[IndiReloaded]

Thank you and I will do some research on the AlAnon support groups in my area if there are any. But question how am I enabling him if I am not answering his calls or giving him money. The last text I sent to him told him I wasn't going to give him anything and to stay away from me and don't call me or text me, to which he replied OK. Then 20 mins later he txt saying I was gonna give your money back by the end of the night and then take you out to eat so that we can talk but you are tripping still. To which I did not respond at all and have not since. He called last night like ten times and didn't txt or leave vm and I didn't answer or call back. So hopefully that is the end of it. Not answering will make him realize he needs to try and find another sucker and go away right?

Yep. It might get a bit worse before it gets better but stick to your guns on this. As soon as you give in, even once, he knows he's got you suckered in. Changing your number sounds like an excellent idea.

Oh good, good luck. Keeping away from this ass is really the best thing for you and your child.

[LouisianaLady29]

So I made a mistake and text him once, because one minute he was calling and texting leaving me msgs along with the text telling me how much he needs help. I told him the answer is no and please stop trying to contact me or I'm going to report you to your po for harassment...I guess the msg got to him delayed because he didn't respond until late at night and said B**** I haven't tried to text you in nearly 3 days now stop stalking me. Im with ****** (his girl) so f-u and get a life hoe. I was just like WOW! That was my ONLY text to him asking him not to contact me and he turned it around as if Id been stalking HIM! I guess his girl saw my text. So yesterday (the next day) he calls me. Twice. I mean SERIOUSLY? How can you call me after you did that? So after his third time trying to call me. I text him "Please leave me alone *****". He text back "Whatever, that's fine ******" and I turned off my phone. Turned it back on and see hed made one more attempt to call me. But nothing else since. I know I shouldn't have responded but what is going through a guys head that he can insult you one minute then act hurt when you don't answer him the next?