Date #2

[Tech]

Just texted "night, sleep well darling x" to this person that I have seen once, knowing she was still online on the site we met through.

she then texted me back saying that if I wanted to do anything on Saturday. hmmm.... no other good offers from other men? (sarcy)

anyway, I said sure. She is apperently seeing and staying over at a friend named John who is married to another guy.... and going to the cinema to watch SITC2. not sure if its just some guy who is not married....

anyway, I said that ok, maybe we can watch a movie on sat but obviously, she is going to the cinema the day before.

so, whats left to do? nothing but walk together really, and have food and...thats it?

doesnt sound like a decent day/date? maybe its a fob off date?

[xxazurexx]

God you are sooooo negative! lol

[Gigabitch]

You are what I would call a catastrophist. Things seem to be going well, Tech. Try to enjoy it, if you can.

[Tech]

thanks. yes well im VERY cautious - its as simple as that. just want to know whats happening and if there isnt "much" to do on this second meet then suggestion is that its a fob off to me.

[xxazurexx]

I would just chill out and let things take their course. If it's meant to happen, it will and if not with her, then someone else. It was only a date after all, not like you are intimately and really deeply involved and at this early stage.

Maybe weekends are the only time she can get a babysitter, not because she's had no other offers. And women tend to like to plan their dates in advance. Know I do anyway. I hate it when guys would call and say 'Hey, fancy meeting tonight'...I like to have a few days notice ya know, or I would say on a Wednesday/Thursday, let's meet up on Saturday.

BTW, you mentioned she was still on this dating site? That tells me that you must be still on there and to notice her on it, lol
How do you know she isn't thinking 'Met me, says he likes me but obviously he is keeping his options open'?

As for dates, well what is wrong with walking or going someplace to eat. I'd be happy enough to do that. You are still spending time with one another.

[Tech]

i dont like the whole attitude of "its its meant to happen, it will and if not with her...then someone else" - that isnt a positive thing. thats just wasting time and not putting effort into it.
yes, want to get her and me to be intimate/deep and build up to it or at least open the doors.....

i just want her to meet up with me again after this second date, its as simple as that - dont want this to be a "boring" or "fob off" date. not sure what to do on this date. ideas?

[Tech]

within 12 hours of arranging a date and me being excited and happy, it gets cancelled.

reason by email:

Hope your well, I am writing to tell you that after much talks this week and last, my ex husband and I have decided to give it another go, I just wanted to tell you as you are a lovely person and clearly deserve somebody without all the baggage I have, it may sound mad but at the end of the day we have a child together and owe it to her. It has nothing to do with you, I really had a lovely time with you. He is here with me now and I told him all about you. I am also quite upset that he has landed this on me now, just when I find somebody nice. Dont ever think it was you, it wasnt. Just wanted to tell you the truth instead of going out with you tomorrow and maybe wasting any of your time. Good luck with your hunt for love, you deserve and will find somebody lovely who deserves you. Take care and I am truly sorry

lies, lies lies. typical women! typical.

knew it was too good to be true. why would a pretty lady like her be interested in an ugly colored mug like me? all because just to pass the time, for them to be treated like a queen and splash out on them. thats all. im only here to be used as a backup plan or a punchbag.

devestated. totally devestated.

but hey, who cares right?

excuses, excuses, excuses.

[xxazurexx]

i dont like the whole attitude of "its its meant to happen, it will and if not with her...then someone else" - that isnt a positive thing. thats just wasting time and not putting effort into it.

Nonsense. You can still adopt the attitude 'if it's gonna happen, it will happen' and still put effort into making something work! Having this attitude, is also having an acceptance that sometimes things work out and sometimes they don't and you aren't left totally 'gutted' and because something may not have worked out. That is the 'reality' of life....things will work out and things won't. With this attitude, you can be more carefree and relaxed and just be yourself in relationships and because you are taking the relationship in it's stride and you choose to let it run it's natural course. Which is far better than to act desperate, needy, clingy, controlling, etc and all the other things people will resort too and to try and make something work/cling onto something....

i just want her to meet up with me again after this second date, its as simple as that - dont want this to be a "boring" or "fob off" date. not sure what to do on this date. ideas?

I wouldn't go to the cinema with someone I was just getting to know....you can't chat in cinemas.

I dunno....most of the guys I went out with, we'd go to some nice pub in the countryside. Have a drink and a meal while we were there.

Do you drive and have a car? There are tons of places you could go to. If it's a nice evening, take a drive to the coast.

[xxazurexx]

within 12 hours of arranging a date and me being excited and happy, it gets cancelled.

reason by email:




lies, lies lies. typical women! typical.

knew it was too good to be true. why would a pretty lady like her be interested in an ugly colored mug like me? all because just to pass the time, for them to be treated like a queen and splash out on them. thats all. im only here to be used as a backup plan or a punchbag.

devestated. totally devestated.

but hey, who cares right?

excuses, excuses, excuses.

I guess that is the gamble you take and when you choose to get involved with seperated women with a hubby in the picture.

You aren't the first and you won't be the last - shit happens all the time.

[Tech]

havent read your response or anyone elses from my last post. i am not going to either. waste of time. waste of energy. nothing but excuses and coverups and no moral or ethical values.

waste of life.

[xxazurexx]

You are a proper saddo, who needs to get a life!

People try to help you and you throw it back in their faces and choose to insult.

Well sod ya...I'm done with you.

[Tech]

i expect such responses from a british woman - typical. sorry but its a fact and you have proven it yet again!

i dont care anymore. you dont see anything because you are all loved up or just love to play games and have no sense of reality or REAL feelings or REAL emotions. just a cover up as always. fake....

no wonder this country is messed up because of such attitude and behavior. one night stands, sleeping around, "woops, the child was an accident but nevermind", single parents, alot more divorces, cheating, blah blah blah

[xxazurexx]

^^Aye, whatever you say Mr Misery Guts

[xxazurexx]

And I'm not British....I'm ENGLISH

[lahnnabell]

Someone should close this thread. Just gonna be a back and forth insult fest. Let the OP do what he wants.

Tech, if you don't want anymore advice, then leave the forum. No one's asking you to stay. But also don't resort to throwing advice back in people's faces just because you're depressed. If you really find life to be that worthless, you probably need some help.