Split up, made a mess, i think she still wants to give it a try, insanity

[andrew76]

Hi

I split up with a girl I had been 'seeing' for about three months. I really really really like her, we had been having sex for about a month and becoming more intimate, it was a little bit one sided from me but she did like me. She told me she wanted to meet other guys on some dates though, we met via internet dating and she wants to continue this. I didn't like this and she got the impression that I liked her too much and she began to feel guilty. So she split from me.

The first two weeks I pretty much went insane, sending her loads of text messages, calling her and demanding to talk to and see her. I blamed her for hurting me. I was no man.

We met each other finally last week just for 45 mins or so. It was ok. I feel much calmer and less angry. I still ike her.

My question
I feel as though I've burnt my bridges. She likes me but I feel i've given her no relaxed route back together.
Can I continue to pursue and hope? Do I wait? She said six months before a drink together!!!!!!!!! Am I deluded?

[xxazurexx]

I think she liked you, continued to see you but she wasn't that serious about you. Which is why she remained on the dating site and kept and continues to keep her options open.

Depends if you want to waste time pursuing something you may never aquire. Though I think your time would be far better spent on finding someone who genuinely wants to be with you.

[lahnnabell]

She tried to be honest with you about her desire to see other people, but you refused to take her seriously. You shouldn't have done what you did. You ruined any hope you had of getting back together with her. 6 months from now she will likely have moved onto a more mature man. One that doesn't demand to talk to her at a moment's notice, or send an insane amount of text messages because he's insecure. You are better off moving on at this point.

[andrew76]

Hi Lahnnabell & xxaz

Thanks for your thoughts. Moving on is probably what is best for me, I'm just finding it difficult.

If I like someone, I fall for them very quickly. Once I've fallen for them I get very jealous. The reason why I couldn't accept her seeing others was because of this jealousy. I liked her too much. I shouldn't have fallen for her until she reciprocated those feelings. I should have finished with her much earlier.

How do I stop being so jealous? How do I stop being insecure?

The insecurity is one thing I can deal with (I've had a lot of change in my life recently). The jealousy is so difficult to deal with. Maybe it is also a sign of insecurity but it is also a very natural thing. I don't want my girlfriend to be going off with other people.

[xxazurexx]

Exactly! You should never make anyone a 'priority, who only makes you an option'.....lesson learned

I don't understand jealousy and because I'm not a jealous person. However I can understand 'insecurity' and because I've experienced that in relationships, but only when and if ever given a real cause to feel insecure/or he has failed to make me feel secure in the relationship.

Thing is and if you didn't want her to date other people, it's something you should have discussed with her and if she had still maintained that she wanted to see others, then you call it quits and look for someone who does want something serious and with you.