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Thread: He won't stop treating me like a friend!

  1. #16
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    vashti is offline Hot love muffin guru
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    Only dating a month, and you're already are making demands about how he should behave?

    This guy sounds like he is simply not a PDA kind of guy. Maybe you should have just dated casually for a while, and then decided if his personality type was a match BEFORE you made him your boyfriend? Just because you let him put his penis in you doesn't give you the right to disregard his feelings about public displays.

    Sorry. Thought you could use an alternative point of view.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

  2. #17
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    Yeah I agree that you're expecting too much too soon, but I can see your point about wanting more consistency. For me, a big part of a relationship is the ability to acknowledge it publicly. I'm very touchy feely, and I probably wouldn't be with someone who wasn't physical with me in public as well as private. HOWEVER... My current bf indicated early on that he feels a bit awkward/shy with PDAs. I simply told him that I'm different, and I find him so attractive that sometimes it is hard to stop myself from touching him, which is the absolute truth. I'm pretty shy too, so a lot of my communication is through touch... Anyway, once he knew these things he ended up being a lot more affectionate in public. But I didn't make a big deal out of it. And as we've become closer, we've become almost sickly sweet with the PDAs, lol.

    I dont think you're wrong for seeing it as something important, but I'd say just give it more time hey...if he is still a bit stand offish a few months in, maybe you should just ask him about it.

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    Has he dated a lot? Do you have other relationships of his to compare to yours?

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    hes not that into you. if a guy is inlove or attracted to you then he will show it. you dont need to bring it up

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    Maybe he just wants to be cool?
    To be or not to be?

    Is that the question?

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    Some people don't like PDA and if you like him you won't want him to do things that he doesn't like. That being said, there should be a way for you guys to compromise. Tell him your concerns and work out a systems of signals that are unique to you, so that you feel close to him and special, but he isn't embarrassed. It may be that holding your hand or rubbing your back in public (or even just a special nickname) is perfectly comfortable to him while kissing is not. The key is to let him know what you need and then work with him to find a solution. I don't get the feeling that he's cheating, but if you have those doubts, ask around and see if he's always been that way, my guess is that he has. Good Luck,
    Adam.

  7. #22
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    i think your over reacting...just because he doesn't like pda, doesn't mean he doesn't like you. if you think about it, him not liking pda can mean he's really into you. it can mean that he wants to keep his deep feelings for you private. plus, it's only been 1 month? if you two are having sex already, sounds to me like the problem is that you sped up the intimacy in private, so now the standard has already been set. honestly, i think pda is quite unnecessary...(with the exception of minor pda like holding hands) when i see pda, the first thing that comes to mind is that the couple wants attention. i'm not trying to bash people that are in favor of pda, i'm just trying to point out that his feelings for you and his level of pda are unrelated.

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