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Thread: Should I forgive her?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
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    Should I forgive her?

    I have this problem that is a little complex and I don't know what to do. Hoping I could get some help here...

    Well here I go. I have this group of friends that I have been hanging out with the last year or two that includes these two girls. I'll just call them M and B. They are best friends with each other and I have become pretty good friends with both of them I'd say.

    Over the past year I was occasionally hooking up with M and started to have feelings for her. I had a feeling it would never develop into anything though because the only times she would want to hook up with me was when we were drinking together, and then it would be like nothing happened the next time I saw her. Anyways, we hooked up two weekends ago and I finally told her how I felt about her and she slept over. We hung out a couple times between then and the next weekend but only in a group setting and we didn't really talk about it.

    Then last weekend, B's brother came to visit. I noticed M was giving him a lot of attention, and when we all went to a bar together it became obvious that she wanted to go home with him, and paid no attention to me whatsoever. I was pretty devastated and pulled B aside to tell her how hurt I was and that I was going to leave. She started apologizing to me profusely, and said that it was something that had been going on between her brother and M for a long time, even before I knew her. Then all of a sudden she started kissing me and saying how much she liked me. I was taken by surprise, and I just went with it. It was nice kissing her and I could also hopefully make M jealous by kissing her best friend.

    Well not exactly... B and I were making out pretty much the rest of the night at the club, and she kept saying how much she wanted me and all this and that. Eventually M and B's brother disappeared, and then the club was closing. So we went outside where our friend was going to pick us up when, *gulp*, B's old hookup was standing there on the corner. All of a sudden, B and him were talking, and I was left standing there on the corner by myself. Our ride showed up and I got in, but B told us she was staying with him, and we drove off. I couldn't believe it.

    The next day, B texted me, called me, and facebook messaged me telling me how sorry she was and how she didn't mean to hurt me and that she was just drunk and wasn't thinking. I know she is sorry but it was so messed up what she did. I still haven't heard from M. I doubt I will ever talk to her again. By the way here is the final detail. Both B and I are moving out of town next week, to opposite sides of the country. I used to think she was a good friend and that I would be in contact with her even after we moved apart, but I just don't know anymore. She keeps texting me saying how she wants me as her friend and doesn't want to lose me, but I just don't know if I can find it in my heart to forgive her. What do I do?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
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    they both sound like they're just after any attention that they can get. leave them to it. moving will be your opportunity to make a fresh start...embrace it and good luck
    They called us a dead generation,
    They told us that we wouldn't survive
    They left us alone in the maelstrom
    As you can see we're all clearly alive.

  3. #3
    Join Date
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    You all aren't really friends, you're just a group of people that hooks up with one another when the bar is closing and no one else is available. Forget the both of them and try to have more self-respect in the future.
    Spammer Spanker

  4. #4
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    Gigabitch, thats the thing that is making it so hard for me. I thought it was more than that. We would hang out all the time when we weren't drinking or at bars. We had BBQ's at each other's houses, played on an intramural softball team together, and went camping together. She even baked me a cake on my birthday. And now she feels absolutely terrible about what she did and keeps asking for my forgiveness. And I hate the fact that I have the power to fix that somewhat by talking to her, but I just don't know if I can, so I just keep ignoring her.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
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    she's realised that, like you say, you have the power over her rather than you being at her beck and call. fair enough you may have been really close in the past but she seems to have changed for the worse.
    They called us a dead generation,
    They told us that we wouldn't survive
    They left us alone in the maelstrom
    As you can see we're all clearly alive.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
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    Male
    Posts
    263
    yeah continuing any type of relationship with these 2 will just cause more trouble. you're moving away soon, the more easier to move on from them and start new.
    Within you I lose myself. Without you I find myself wanting to become lost again.

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