Why does my ex want to be friend

[Drashou]

hello. I am new and made this account just so I could ask this..

This is my first serious relationship and here's the situation... This girl I've been dating for one year (long distance) let me know a few days ago that she wants to break up. The reason being, she's been going through emotional issues (trust me, there is alot) and she wants to clear everything out of her life to get a new start. Now, the problem is.. SHE WANTS TO BE FRIEND! She calls me everyday ever since the break up, we talk normally and she say she still loves me. In fact she never actually broke up with me herself. She FORCE ME to say the words to break up with her which made her throw up later. She says she couldn't bare saying them because it would hurt her too much.

She now offers to pay for my hotel room and everything so I can come see her in a few weeks. Clearly she is not ready to break up. How do I make her see she is making a mistake?? Do I stop talking to her to make her miss me or be her friend to show her she needs me in her life?? Any suggestions??? PLZ...

[kitkitkitty]

i know there are a lot, but what are the main emotional issues? and from where i'm standing, she forced this 'break up' big time. i mean, me and my ex-now-best-mate talk a lot even though we recently broke up but this is pretty odd.

[Drashou]

She never told me the main emotional issue. But I suspect it has something to do with someone close to her that died in Haiti's earthquake. This guy she considered close to her (like a brother) fell in love with her and kissed her when she went to haiti for a visit. She left the country after her visit but the guy wasn't over her when she started seeing me and they still talked. She told me there is no way she can feel the same way for him and I know she was telling the truth. Then the earthquake came and he dies. Since then she has been having nightmare about him been taking away from her and such.

She is the kind of person who try to put aside all the painful feelings so she can get be happy. Last week, pretty much everything that has been bottled up inside of her came out all of the sudden to put her in great physical pain. Thats when she decides to come up with a plan to help her get past everything and start a new life... including breaking up with me.