HELP! more confused than ever

[Missapple]

My boyfriend is a violent guy, i really love him but he scares the hell out of me when he's angry, especially when he beats me, and when he doesn't he threatens to, scares me even more that i'm 4 months pregnant, despite all that, when were not arguing he's a real sweetheart. The point is i decided to leave him now, and although i didnt tell him (and i wont, too scared of him, ill just run away when the right opportunity comes), he started feeling it, he's become so nice, and he's always telling me how much he loves me, that im the love of his life, that he cant live without me and bla bla bla. What im wondering is, is he sincere? Could it be that he will ever change? is it a strategy? Should i really leave him or should i give him another chance? Well im too confused to think, please tell me what you think

[Legato]

um...well he's physically beating you. That should be enough to leave. I've heard of this before. Women get in the worst relationships ever and keep going back to the abuse. if he hits you, you might want to call the cops. That's such bullsh*t. I hate when guys get great women and just treat them like sh*t. I guess it keeps the passion going or something. I don't know what goes through girls' heads.

[xxazurexx]

No offence, but didn't you post about this a few days ago and you got some excellent advice.

Didn't you listen to it?

Do you think that people are gonna say anything different, to what was advised in your last thread on same subject?

What is it you are looking for? To be told it's ok to remain in this relationship?

[girl68]

Just think how angry he's going to be when the baby just won't shut up.

[Charisma]

There's plenty of guys that will care about you just like he does without beating you Missapple. You should have left the very first time he hit you, not at this point, when you're pregnant.

People only change when they realise they need to. Angry people are rarely the changing kind. They will blame you for it, and then you will put up with it thinking you deserved to be hit, etc. It's unacceptable for you, or anyone else.

Leave him.

[Missapple]

dont get me wrong, the reason why i posted this message is that since he started felling that i might leave him hes become so nice and hes looking so miserable, and im just wondering if its gonna stay like that or if he will turn back to who he was before, its why i ask your advice, do you think violent men can ever change?

[RockNRoll]

My boyfriend is a violent guy, i really love him but he scares the hell out of me when he's angry, especially when he beats me,

Do you love YOURSELF and your child?!
Poor you getting in this situation and well done on planning way out of it. I think you might want some help with it (there are assosiation who help women in such situation, police as well).
Now, switch on your brain. You must take care of YOURSELF and your CHILD.
How can you call him nice?!? He is violent. Violent with his girlfriend! That would be more than enough! But it's even more: he beats woman!!! who is his girlfriend, who he supposed to love! who is pregnant!!! That's a terrible abuse. You shouldn't have any doubts AT ALL about leaving him and sorting your life out!
PS I just read you previous thread. Did you contact any organisation that can help you? Your family might still want to help you in such situation, whatever problem you had with them. And you also wrote there, that he threatened to kill you if you leave him. That is so serious, you really should report to police and get protection! And don't wait, act NOW.

[MerryH]

do you think violent men can ever change?

Don't count on it. It's one of the reasons people stay in abusive relationships. The abuser will say and do anything to get you to stay, but once they're comfortable again, the abuse starts back up. You did the right thing by deciding to leave him - don't let anything stop you, no matter how sorry you feel for him.