I like this girl, what do i do?

[nukl92]

This is gonna be kind of long sorry...

Im a freshman in college. My first class on my first day i saw this girl walk into class that was pretty good looking and caught my eye. I hoped she would sit by me but she didnt. So through the day i realized we were going to all the same classes. On my way to my last class of the day i realized that she was going to the same class as me again. So i got some courage and asked "are you going to such and such?" she said "yes" and i told her how i realized that we had all the same classes. She said she was glad she met me because she didnt wanna walk alone around campus between classes. after our last class i walked her to her dorm and she gave me her phone number. i thought that was a pretty good sign. So blah blah blah, its been a month now and we sit with eachother and walk together to every class. i learned about 3 weeks ago that she had a boyfriend, after i looked at her facebook. i was bummed but i figured they werent getting married lol so i guess i could wait. so this monday, the topic of our english class was about relationships. she said something like "ugh i cant stand hearing this, i just broke up with my bf" and i said oh really? i didnt know u had a bf (but i did cuz i saw it on her facebook lol) she said they had went out for 4 years. i asked her about the breakup today and she didnt really wanna talk about it, she said she is just ignoring him. i guess they got into a fight. but i am pretty sure its final if ur thinking they might go back out. When should i ask her if she wants to go out? i dont think she even likes me but isnt it worth a shot? im not good with this kinda stuff, ive really only had one gf and that was last year and it didnt go far. i really dont think she likes me but idk if she was just like that cuz she had a bf before. btw, shes a girl that has alot of male friends, which really makes me second guess myself too. no girl has every really liked me except for my one gf, but i think she was kinda weird anyway. im not like a weird kid or anything, im not a player, i try to be as much of a gentleman as i can be, im a nice guy, but i guess what isnt going for me is my looks. im not the most confident guy. i dont think im really that bad looking, i guess im just nothing really to look at. idk. its hard to be good looking in college going up against guys that have bigger biceps than ur head lol. no girl has really ever looked at me as someone to have a relationship with. i wanna tell her how i feel but i get very nervous. it took me all day just to man up and ask her how the break up was going. she really didnt wanna talk about it but she said that she is just ingoring him. i really dont know how to go about this because i really have never been in a relationship or been liked by a girl before. (like i said, i dont think she likes me like that anyway) Im pretty sure she doesnt really look at me as bf material, i think we are just kinda school friends. but i have partied with her once, but it wasnt really anything special, thats another story lol. we text eachother a good bit but it just pretty much revolves around school. how do i go about seeing if she even likes me, or asking her out? i dont think i have enough balls just to ask her face to face lol. is it a bad idea to text her or chat her on facebook and tell her how i feel? in high school i never pursued girls because i knew they wouldnt like me, im in college now and i wanna have a better college experience with girls than i did in high school. idk what the hell to do, any and all info will be really appreciated, i feel like a loser having to ask this online but idk how the hell to go about it

PS: her facebook is still logged in on my pc because i havent used it yet. is it a good i idea to put a funny status up? like ! <3 "my name" or something? and see how she responds?

[MorganLouise]

that is so intense! i have a site that gives advice in my portfolio, i really advise you to check it out.

my portfolio is: MorganLouise . net

[thegetmyexback]

Oh man. O.K. your FIRST AND BIGGEST problem is your insecurity. Girls can smell it form miles away. If you're not confident she's into you big time, she won't be. Just as simple as that.
When asked about dating advice the big Sean Connery said - confidence, confidence, confidence, so don't behave like you're scared.
You're allowed to be scared inside, but you're not allowed to show that to her.

Next up - don't by any chance try to "confess" your feelings, that's not gonna get you anywhere.
Those teen movies you see when the guys confesses and she screams me too and they ride into the sunset together, yeah that doesn't really happen in real life.

Don't talk to girls by convincing and confessing, make them feel. You can't talk your way into her liking you, you can make her feel it.
How?

Well this is the tricky part
no1. be confident around her, don't apologies for everything you do around her
no2. make her laugh - that's a shortcut to a women's heart (by that I don't recommend you behaving like a clown)
no3. flirt, play, have fun and tease her - make fun of her but only a bit, if you get a slap in the arm you're on the right track
no4. play hot and cold, hug her when you feel like it but when she tries to do the same act like you're shocked
no5. when ever she does something that can be misinterpreted accuse her of trying to pick YOU up
no6. don't worry about the other guy, NOTHING you can do about that except to charm her and make her forget about him naturally

[nukl92]

thanks. that helps. today i was gonna ask her to go out but she ended up not being in class. so i get fed up with waiting and texted her during class. in the text i put:" this is kinda lame texting u but u werent here today. i was wondering if u wanted to go out sometime?" she replied, "ya, that'd be fun!" and then told me how she wouldnt be able to this weekend cuz a friend is coming in from out of town. but that was fine because i already knew that and i was going back home so it wouldnt of mattered. im just hoping she doesnt think i want to go out as a friend. what do u think?

[nukl92]

well the last few days i was suspicious of her getting back with her bf. today i saw her wall on facebook and her bf posted on it asking when shes coming home and stuff. idk if shes a type of girl to talk with her ex but im not sure. should i ask her about it and say i saw ur wall and was wondering how u and ur bf were? or is that not a good idea? so i dont sound like a creeper. i just want to know what she thinks of me already, im getting sick of waiting around. i cant take worrying about this everyday and its the only thing i think about. if she not into me, i understand, no girl has been. but if she is in to me i wanna know already. i just dont know how to bring it up and i also dont know how to ask if she is still going out with her bf

[nukl92]

*Update*

So she said she would go out with me but i never actually took her out yet. Monday i said something to the extent of "so are we ever gonna go out?" and she said "whenever u ask me" idk why i said that because its my job to actually take her out, i guess i was just getting anxious, idk, lol. i was gonna asker her out again yesterday for us to go out tomorrow, but we walked home with some class friends (dudes) so i didnt want to do it then cuz it would have been awkward. i texted her the same day after school saying "what are u doing thursday" she never responded and i asked her about it today and she said her friend had her phone all day because her friends phone broke. i know thats true because she told me about it before, she said her friend told her about the text late at night while she was sleeping and thats y she didnt respond. so thats cool, no red flags there. so today while i was at work i messaged her on facebook, this is our conversation:

Me: so considering u didnt want to respond to me yesterday, does that mean u dont want to go out with me tomorrow?

Her: i didnt even get your message yesterday haha and idk if i'll be able too tomorrow or not

Me: just keep on putting it off lol. if u dont want to its cool

Her:aha im sorry, if it was earlier this week i could but im going with my friends tomorrow and idk what time i have to..and friday im going home so next week sometime?

Me:ya thats cool
Me: probly tuseday or thrursday cuz i dont have work

Her: alrighty just lemme know

Me: k



So this is looking good right? i just really hope that she doesnt think were going out as friends. i made it pretty clear that i want to go out with her as more than friends right?

[nukl92]

ok so more than a month later and i still dont know what to do. today she was complaining to me about her bf how he bugs her on facebook and stuff and she said that he said he wants her in her life somehow and she said shes cool being friends with her and what not. is that already a bad sign that she is talking to me about her bf.... like a friend? instead of someone she likes?

a few weeks ago i was texting her and we were talking about where to go out to eat on our (hopefully) date. she then asked y i wanted to do this so bad, and i told her cuz ive been trying to for 2 months. then she said "Y?" and i said "Really? because i like u... lol" she the responded with "oh do u now?" i sent one final text back say "lol" and that was the end of that

anyway, last week i as bored and messaged her on facebook. im not sure exactly how the conversation went but i was getting very anxious again and i had to leave with my friends for something. so it was kind of rushed. all i really remember is saying do u like me or not? blah blah blah, then she said something, then said "i dont like anyone" with a smiley face. is that the end of me trying? is that her just being funny? is that her just making a pun at her bf? i wish i knew what this meant. and how she said a few times before that she would go out with me, (even tho it didnt happen) does it mean she really didnt want to in the first place? or did she maybe like me and just over it? BTW, i feel ridiculous for doing this but i know the info to her facebook so i looked at her messages between her and her bf on their. the convo went something like him saying if u need money let me know, her saying that its hard for her being single cuz she has never done it before. that its not a bad thing to try being single and some other stuff.

is this a lost cause? im i just blind and she doesnt/never liked me? is she just not ready to like someone? i have no clue! IM SO CONFUSED, any help would be appreciated!

[Jman39]

sorry to break it to ya, i was in the same situation... she had bf, broke up, thought i had a chance and they got back together...

Trust me, shes still into her bf/ex bf.
Shes trying to be nice to you... As soon as a girl starts talking about her bf to you and complains, uve become her lady friend... ur so far friendzoned man, uve becoem her emotional tampon... dont be that guy from now on... Its hard to get out of the friend zone, but i will give u advice anyways...

1) dont listen to her all the time- if she complains about her bf, tell her u gotta go... dont listen to taht shit, shes got girl friends for that... or in ur case, ur the guy friend...

2) u come off as weak- when you asked her out, you shoulda told her, not asked her... There is a difference between, "wanna go out friday or saturday? whenever ur free" and "im going to this really awesome place that has amazing food this friday, come with me" You set the terms, you set the time, u take the initiative- if she says shes busy, shes not interested... if she SINCERELY is busy, shed say something like "oh friday im busy, but im free saturday!" aka she will GIVE you another time she is available...

3) dont chase one fish, keep ur options open, look elsewhere... dont try to put all ur eggs in one basket, u will potentially be wasting ur time and in the end, get hurt... we all know, she knows, ur a really nice guy.... girls become FRIENDS with nice guys... be a little mysterious, make a girl curious abotu you... play hot and cold... act interested, then go off doing another thing... it drives attractive women crazy cus they are USED to being hit on buy nice guys, ALL THE TIME... ur not the first guy to attempt at wooing her... dont be one of those guys... for real

[Applesauce]

the OP made the same thread in another sub-forum. So I will share here what I said there.

it was over when he tried to get her to open up about her breakup. Why he did that is beyond me. It not only makes her associate you with negative feelings but you instantly become her gay best friend when you volunteered to listen to her guy problems

[nukl92]

the OP made the same thread in another sub-forum. So I will share here what I said there.

it was over when he tried to get her to open up about her breakup. Why he did that is beyond me. It not only makes her associate you with negative feelings but you instantly become her gay best friend when you volunteered to listen to her guy problems

i just wanted to know if it was final

[nukl92]

sorry to break it to ya, i was in the same situation... she had bf, broke up, thought i had a chance and they got back together...

Trust me, shes still into her bf/ex bf.
Shes trying to be nice to you... As soon as a girl starts talking about her bf to you and complains, uve become her lady friend... ur so far friendzoned man, uve becoem her emotional tampon... dont be that guy from now on... Its hard to get out of the friend zone, but i will give u advice anyways...

1) dont listen to her all the time- if she complains about her bf, tell her u gotta go... dont listen to taht shit, shes got girl friends for that... or in ur case, ur the guy friend...

2) u come off as weak- when you asked her out, you shoulda told her, not asked her... There is a difference between, "wanna go out friday or saturday? whenever ur free" and "im going to this really awesome place that has amazing food this friday, come with me" You set the terms, you set the time, u take the initiative- if she says shes busy, shes not interested... if she SINCERELY is busy, shed say something like "oh friday im busy, but im free saturday!" aka she will GIVE you another time she is available...

3) dont chase one fish, keep ur options open, look elsewhere... dont try to put all ur eggs in one basket, u will potentially be wasting ur time and in the end, get hurt... we all know, she knows, ur a really nice guy.... girls become FRIENDS with nice guys... be a little mysterious, make a girl curious abotu you... play hot and cold... act interested, then go off doing another thing... it drives attractive women crazy cus they are USED to being hit on buy nice guys, ALL THE TIME... ur not the first guy to attempt at wooing her... dont be one of those guys... for real

thanks, well not really, since it was bad news lol. i mean she doesnt sit there and complain about him and let everything go, it just kinda came up in convo, it wasnt like a sit down venting situation. this girl is very moody i guess. not like shes nice then meant he next day, just like, shes always tired and has no energy, complains about being in class, always has problems etc. and she also isnt always into talking about all her problems, so i dont think of myself as the "emotional tampon." about 1 or 2 day per week she is actually peppy and full of energy and is fun to be around and is very interactive, and we have good times and laughs. since she said she doesnt like anyone should i just move on, or put my foot down tell her where and when and see what she says? or do u think it will just be an automatic no?

[Applesauce]

she's not interested in you. Displays of behavior like putting your foot down will just make her think you're a creep

[Jman39]

sorry OP- im just trying to save u the hassle, u really should forget about it... ive been in your shoes man... exactly. Always hearing her out, having some convos here and there, that doesnt mean anything... if a girl likes you, she will drop ton of hints, and will even go out of her way to date you... right now ur going out of ur way... she knows u like her... she jsut doesnt want to hurt ur feelings... just move along and learn on the next woman u approach