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Thread: cheating on me with his country???

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    73

    cheating on me with his country???

    hi everyone, i'm having problems with my bf...again i come back here for help b/c of your great advice...appreciate it in advance! i posted about our issues a while back, basically it was his commitment issues, not prioritizing the relationship, flakiness, etc. after almost breaking up, we decided to work on our relationship as we both love each other and didn't want to let each other go. things have been up and down for the past 5 months or so. but recently i discovered he has lied to me a lot and i don't trust him at all. i found out that he goes out clubbing a lot without inviting me or telling me, and it's always to latin nights at clubs or latin clubs (he's latino). i don't know if i'm overreacting or not, but it really hurts that he would flat-out lie to me. i have no problem with him going out without me, it's the frequency and dishonesty that have made me feel really betrayed. i also have no problem with him having female friends, it's just very sketchy and suspicious to me that i don't know them and he doesn't invite me to places where they are. he has said that he doesn't want to because they are "gossipy" but to me that's totally absurd- if they are so gossipy, don't be friends with them, plus we are all adults and i really don't care what they might say.

    also, i feel like he feels the need to have a separate life of "his culture" where he spends a lot of time with only people from his country, male & female, and never invites me. previously, we had been out with his friends and i always got along fine with them, but in the past year or so this has pretty much stopped. i told him point blank let's just break up if what you want is to be with a woman from your own country/culture, but he told me that's absolutely not what he wants. i know from his emotional reaction he felt really bad, but maybe that's just because i caught him in lies so he can't have it both ways anymore. i don't get it...really confused and hurt. i feel that his friends have no problem accepting me, it's his issue to keep me "separate" or something...

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    4,622
    He is taking advantage of you. RUN

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    73
    really, is it that bad?...we have had so many awesome things together too...

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Waterloo Ontario
    Posts
    765
    I think he may be a little biase and or a little sexiest just a guess you might be spending a lot of time alone bcuz some cultures do have these biases

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    416
    a lier is a lier, no matter what culture, language, it is in. there is no excuse.

    who cares if you have some awesome times together, if he is lying about the times that you are apart.

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