I am new to all of this but I am also getting close to the end of my rope on this issue. I have been with my bf going on 3 years, and it was a rocky start but we now have a home together, and my son likes my bf, it is really good, with the exception of his mother (and sometimes his sister)
His mother goes out of her way to constantly criticizes me, CONSTANTLY! She will come into our home and hang things on the walls, clean, and rearrange the way my kitchen is set up because, as she says "It's just not efficient this way", and although I have been overly kind and trying my best she has done so many mean and hurtful things to me and my son.
When my bf mentioned that he wanted to get married, in front of the whole family, she said, I really wish you would have married your girlfriend from high school.
I have expressed my annoyance with the situations for the past 3 years, and he has always said to me how it is ridiculous and how his mother acts and treats us but has not once said a word although he's promised to do so.
Christmas was hosted this year at our house, and it went as well as it could, everyone had a good time, and I bit my tongue through out the whole day and night while his mom just kept 'em coming. I drank way too much and made it through the night ... everyone said their goodbyes, and then I laid into my boyfriend how he promised to say something when she vocallized how she didn't like dinner, or started cleaning my kitchen, I didn't expect him to fight her, but a polite Mom, sit down please, you are our guest and we can clean up... or a well I think the brisket is great.... Not one word. Meanwhile, his mother left something at our house and they came back for it, she walked into me having a drunken melt down and decided to pipe in with her comments about how dare I talk to her son like that, and then....... I let her have it. I told her that incase she had a problem noticing, she does not live here, she has no right to move my things, or clean my house, or make any remarks whatsoever about how we do things here. It was bad.
She finally left, and I am no longer welcome at any family function, says his family.
I know I shouldn't have said those things, and I shouldn't have had so many cocktails, but is this man that I love ever going to stand up for me and my son?
I feel that my outburst would have never happened if he would have taken care of this years ago.
I am not asking him to write his family off, I understand the importance of family, but he needs to make her aware that the kind of behavior that has been going on is not acceptable here...
Am I wasting my time with this battle that I will never win?