Hitting on and dating girls my age

[PolarBear12]

Recently I have found myself only being successful when I met girls a few years younger than me- I'm 24 and I've been meeting girls 20-22yo. At first I didn't think much of it, but I've talked to my friends about it since and they say it's because I look far younger than my age. They've also said that older guys, even if not super attractive, are more likely to be successful with good looking girls who are a bit younger. I'm not sure if that's the case, but whatever.

Anyways, here's a recent picture. Do I really look younger than 24? Do I have good enough looks to meet attractive girls my own age? I'm not a shallow guy at all, and I guess there's nothing I can do to change my looks either way, but it's just something that has been on my mind lately.

[Gratedwasabi]

Recently I have found myself only being successful when I met girls a few years younger than me- I'm 24 and I've been meeting girls 20-22yo. At first I didn't think much of it, but I've talked to my friends about it since and they say it's because I look far younger than my age. They've also said that older guys, even if not super attractive, are more likely to be successful with good looking girls who are a bit younger. I'm not sure if that's the case, but whatever.

Anyways, here's a recent picture. Do I really look younger than 24? Do I have good enough looks to meet attractive girls my own age? I'm not a shallow guy at all, and I guess there's nothing I can do to change my looks either way, but it's just something that has been on my mind lately.

i1114.photobucket.com/albums/k528/polarbear122/DSC_0082.jpg (might have to copy and paste)

Is this a serious post? You look older then 24, if anything. At least from that photo. Then again, your body language shows a severe lack of confidence and you need confidence to get girls older then early 20s.

Confidence and "maturity" are what mid 20s women are looking for. If you don't have both at first glance, they'll often pass you up.

[PolarBear12]

Is this a serious post? You look older then 24, if anything. At least from that photo. Then again, your body language shows a severe lack of confidence and you need confidence to get girls older then early 20s.

Confidence and "maturity" are what mid 20s women are looking for. If you don't have both at first glance, they'll often pass you up.

Thanks for your opinion.

Yes, I am serious. Most people think I am 19-21. I always get carded when buying alcohol. Not looking confident could definitely be an issue. Whenever I go to bars with people my age, I feel like I am WAY too young to be there based purely on how old other people look to me. It's frustrating because I consider myself to be a confident guy, and mature for my age- I'm not super cocky or confident, but I think that's a good thing.

[Anna25]

No, you don't look too young but as Gratedwasabi pointed out, you project lack of confidence. If its a young "hot" girl with tons of options, she'll gravitate to the guy with the greatest confidence, generally speaking.

[PolarBear12]

No, you don't look too young but as Gratedwasabi pointed out, you project lack of confidence. If its a young "hot" girl with tons of options, she'll gravitate to the guy with the greatest confidence, generally speaking.

Thanks for the reply.

Any tips on how I could project more confidence in my appearance?

[Anna25]

Thanks for the reply.

Any tips on how I could project more confidence in my appearance?

Ooh, that's a hard one. Confidence is something very much internal and there isn't really an effective way of "faking" it, nor would I advise such a move. It has to come from inside, you need to know your worth. For me, it was a process that took years and involved various situations in life that "tested" my true character and beliefs. I think the only way to build confidence is by challenging yourself and seeing how you hold up to those challenges.

In the case of girls: practice makes perfect. Just go up and say "hi". Don't think any girl is doing you a favor because she isn't. Come up with a confident smile and strike up a conversation (otherwise known as hitting on them ). Don't take it personally if you're shot down, know that its their loss. You can be humorous and gracious about it and move on to the next girl. Don't make her think she's too important to you (in the initial hitting on stage). People want what they can't have. Also, if you are shot down don't take it to the opposite extreme of acting as though she is a worthless bug or some other kind of fiercely negative emotion toward her. That gives her too much importance. The thing is, any guy, even the "successful" ones, will generally get 10 no's for every one yes. You're not alone. If you're still in the learning process, perhaps try hitting on girls you aren't totally bonkers "wow she's such a hot bombshell!" about and instead are more "wow she's pretty/cute/etc." about. You'll be more confident and put together and as your success builds, so will your confidence.

In any case, that's as much as advise as I could muster on such a subject. I've never hit on girls so I'm not such a guru on the topic

[girl68]

whatever you do compliments to pretty girls are the worst pick ups ever.

and no you look roughly your age.

[PolarBear12]

Ooh, that's a hard one. Confidence is something very much internal and there isn't really an effective way of "faking" it, nor would I advise such a move. It has to come from inside, you need to know your worth. For me, it was a process that took years and involved various situations in life that "tested" my true character and beliefs. I think the only way to build confidence is by challenging yourself and seeing how you hold up to those challenges.

In the case of girls: practice makes perfect. Just go up and say "hi". Don't think any girl is doing you a favor because she isn't. Come up with a confident smile and strike up a conversation (otherwise known as hitting on them ). Don't take it personally if you're shot down, know that its their loss. You can be humorous and gracious about it and move on to the next girl. Don't make her think she's too important to you (in the initial hitting on stage). People want what they can't have. Also, if you are shot down don't take it to the opposite extreme of acting as though she is a worthless bug or some other kind of fiercely negative emotion toward her. That gives her too much importance. The thing is, any guy, even the "successful" ones, will generally get 10 no's for every one yes. You're not alone. If you're still in the learning process, perhaps try hitting on girls you aren't totally bonkers "wow she's such a hot bombshell!" about and instead are more "wow she's pretty/cute/etc." about. You'll be more confident and put together and as your success builds, so will your confidence.

In any case, that's as much as advise as I could muster on such a subject. I've never hit on girls so I'm not such a guru on the topic

I tend to be fairly successful with girls at bars/clubs but again they also tend to be younger. I feel like I'm confident when I talk to girls, but as you and a few others said, I don't look confident.

In your opinion, am I attractive enough to be approaching "hot" girls? Perhaps I am being successful with younger girls because of my confidence, and striking out with girls my age because of my looks.

[Gratedwasabi]

Thanks for your opinion.

Yes, I am serious. Most people think I am 19-21. I always get carded when buying alcohol. Not looking confident could definitely be an issue. Whenever I go to bars with people my age, I feel like I am WAY too young to be there based purely on how old other people look to me. It's frustrating because I consider myself to be a confident guy, and mature for my age- I'm not super cocky or confident, but I think that's a good thing.

Dude, everyone that doesn't clearly look over 35 gets carded in most places. Businesses lose liquor licenses for not carding. Don't take that personally.

You don't look that young, but you look meek. Like, not to break down and criticize your photo but to be helpful, your "smile" there is extremely timid and women notice that right away. Just relax and give a big ol' smile, it projects confidence. Your shoulders are slouched, your stance is very closed; legs together, hands together and protective, etc. Practice better posture. Try to make sure you're holding your shoulders BACK, it'll straighten your back and give you a broader stance. If you're going to clasp your hands, clasp them so they're a fist; not gingerly holding your finger.

Smiling is the first place to start. When in doubt, smile. And when I say smile, I mean a whole facial smile. Don't halfass it.

If you're lacking confidence, a good place to start when approaching girls is approach their friend, which you'll be less nervous about, and then move on to your target. Also, don't try pickup lines. The way to hit on a girl is to walk up, smile, extend your hand and say "Hello, I'm ___." Branch out from there however you like. You'll get shot down, oh well, smile, wish her a nice evening, and move on. ALWAYS smile and be polite when you get shot down, you'd be surprised how sometimes a girl will come back and apologize and hit on YOU if you just smile and take it politely.

Looks mean less to older girls then they do younger girls. Fact.

[xxazurexx]

Hmm, I'm alone in thinking you do look younger than 24 it seems, but not much younger.

Girls around 20, 22 are more or less your age grouping anyway...why worry about getting girls 2 years younger?? I see it as being no big deal.

And if I was your age, I'd talk to you....I think you are a good looking guy.

[Boisdevie]

The age difference is very little so why get worried about it?n I'm 47. My GF is 40 so in percentage terms that's about the same as 24 and 20- am I worried - no

[eonbar]

yeh, you defo dont look 24 imo.
either way, does it really matter? 2 years is nout