Background: I work at a hotel and dating there is not as uncommon as in office settings. I asked out a 25yr. old woman who recently started working there. The reason that I did so is that beyond the fact that I found her physically attractive, I really liked the way she carried herself, acting mature, classy and well composed. There are other women there who I know wanted me to ask them out and flirted with me but I hadn't liked any because of gossip issues and because many of them act very emotionally immature and like to hang out in cliques of like minded people where you see these "adults" who still act as high school kids with all this ridiculous drama and dependency.
Well, I started out by watching this girl's attitude, I liked the way we started talking and interacting day by day, I thought the little signals she used to show me she was interested where suble and classy for instance , she discreetly gave me a quick flirtatious gaze and subtle smile when passing by to let me know that she approved of me after we had spent sometime talking earlier this one day; I looked for her gaze again and eventhough she knew it, she didn't gaze back so as not to over do it, which I saw as a sign of composture and playing hard to get that I liked. I asked for her number later that day which she gladly wrote down and gave to me. I didn't see her for about 5 days (for the last couple of weeks, we only see each other once a week) and when we saw each other again, we initially didn't want to be too obvious about our interest in the other but gradually drfited towards each other in a very romantic way, she eventually made a couple of comments that would take us back to our flirting, the whole time this girl being very feminine, sweet and classy and interested in me. I set a date with her that day. When she left that day she said bye very swiftly leaving me wanting more but I liked that, not making it too easy. I was excited for finally having met someone who I find attractive and who seems to have a cool attitude and classy demeanor, I want to get to know her more so I start picking out a place for our date in a couple of days.
Today at work I was talking to a couple of co-workers (a woman and a guy) who I know to be honest and I mentioned her and my co-workers immediately made a burlesque noise of disapproval and commented on how she had her neck all covered in hickies her first week working there (I wasn't there) WHAT THE HELL!!??? the reason I was so interested in this girl is because of the classy way she carried herself around me which is in total contradiction to someone who would go around with her neck covered in hickies!! what is she 15!
THE ISSUE: this discovery burst my bubble and has led me to believe that she may have acted around me that way because she sees me as someone she wouldn't mind dating so she's playing her cards right but that in fact she's someone who is far from being classy and mature.
Also, she told me how she was glad that she had gotten to go out with her cousin and sister a couple of days earlier because she hadn't had a drink in a while to which I replied that I was glad that she got to as well and I was thinking that it was cool that she wasn’t a party animal. Today my co-workers tell me that she's gone out with the people from that immature and gossipy clique at work that I'm not too thrilled about. I feel like my impression of her is totally wrong, I don't really want to even go on date with this girl anymore. Am I wrong for this? I hope it snows so I don't have to take her out.
If we can't go out on Thursday because of snow, do you think that it would be rude and wrong to not reschedule ?
I'm afraid that if I keep hanging around this girl and since I like her a lot, I may end up attached and sleeping with a person who's not right for me. Believe me, I have met and been with women who are professionals are acting like you'd expect them to keep you around and ultimately it's a failure and a waste of time because that's not who they really are.
I think I'm too attracted to her to just be doing her, I have other options in that field.
I appreciate your advise, Thank you for taking the time to read this.