Need some advice.

[Gizmo1988]

Okay, don't really know how to fully start this out. About 4 - 5 months ago a wonderful person messaged me from a dating site. At first I though it was just gonna be another girl just wanting to play games. Well her and I talk on the phone for a bit and then we met about 2 weeks later. Over the phone we had a lot in common and we found out we did have a lot in common in person. Normally meeting someone in person, I tend to be really nervous around them. I wasn't around her. I'm also really shy around most girls too and I wasn't around her until recently. Well she told me she was dating someone else at the time and that this guys mom has a restraining order on her.

She is 22 and the guy she was with was 17. Well her and I where still hanging out a lot and one night she ended up having to stay the night. Well I wasn't a virgin after that night and though it was kinda odd how it happened. Anyways I asked her if she would give me a chance. She said she only thought of me as a friend and ask if me and her can hang out just as friend. A few weeks later I asked her again. She said she only thought of me as a friend. Well a day before new years she wanted me to stay the night at her house. So I did. We went to the movies before hand and had a great time. Well I went to her house and met her mom, dad, and her brother. She has a really nice family. Well that night we ended up sleeping with each other again.

I'm not gonna lie, I'm really glad in a way it happened. Well a few days later she said she was gonna see her ex in Nashville. I called and asked her if she would give me a chance since for the first time I felt jealous. She said no again. Well a day later she hangs out with me. She said to me while we where in the car that she doesn't want to get with her ex for the way he treated her. Well she went down there and told me she felt odd around and didn't date him. A few weeks later her and I went to see Avenged Sevenfold live and she kept pressing her body up to mine the whole time. I wanted to ask her again, I didn't though.

A day later, this girl that was tutoring me asked if I would give her a chance. I said sure. A day pass and my she was talking to me on yahoo. She got really mad and said I do like you more then just a friend. Well she came over and said she'll think about getting with me. Honestly just hearing her consider made me really happy. She is basically my dream girl I told her.

Here is where I need the advice. I said I'm really shy and I've only been with one girl for 8 years. I don't really know how I sound act around her to make her fall for me more I mean I act like myself and for some reason myself is being really shy lately. Also she lives over 35-40 miles away so I can only see her so often. She has a car and I don't. I've wanted to talk to her more on the phone, but I've been scared to ask if she is okay with that. I don't want to seem like I'm trying to rush her or anything.

Any advice would be great.

[curly1118]

So from what I gather from this is that she was dating a guy who was 17 while she was 22 and ended up sleeping with you, she turns you down a number of times and says she was to be "just friends" even though you've had sex, and now that she finds out that you told someone else that you would give them a chance she gets angry?

This girl sounds off, man. I wouldn't waste much time on her, especially if she's just going to "consider" getting "with" you. As for the shy thing, just be yourself. I can understand why some people would be shy but just be yourself. If it did end up long term (which I highly doubt) then she'll figure out who you are regardless. If you're scared to ask her to talk on the phone more then something is wrong there, also. I don't think many women like men who are scared to talk to them.

In my honest opinion I would just move on, she comes across as one of those girls who is just playing games with you. Does your dream girl have sex with you and then only "consider" being with you?

[MerryH]

So from what I gather from this is that she was dating a guy who was 17 while she was 22 and ended up sleeping with you, she turns you down a number of times and says she was to be "just friends" even though you've had sex, and now that she finds out that you told someone else that you would give them a chance she gets angry?

That's what I'm going with. ^

She really does sound a bit off. There are a number of red flags that point to the possibly of her being a little crazy. Plus, she has flat-out told you 'no' before. Several times. And recently said, "Well okay fine, maybe, just don't go for that other girl." That's still a 'no.' So leave this one alone. I would almost put money on the fact that she's got a few screws loose, so the sooner you run, the better.

When you find the right girl, you won't worry so much about how you act around her.

[xxazurexx]

She's playing games.

I'd also be concerned as to why her exes mum has a restraining order on her. That is a huge 'red flag'.