if you're not married you're single....

[SelflessnHumble]

Let me tell you something about *marriage* just so you can know the truth behind it:

Prior to the Cvil War? There were no marriage licenses and Blacks were considered livestock animals...Never considered a human being...
So...AFTER the Civil War when African Americans' status's were elevated (to be granted privileges)

The sole purpose of a Marriage license (instituted just after the Civil War) was to allow Blacks to intermarry with Whites.... <--------------Fact
2nd Fact: Once you get a marriage license: you grant the STATE the power to become a 3rd party!!!
Last fact: Getting ANY license: means YOU are asking permission for the privilege to be ___________ (in this case married) recognized by the State...

Common Law Marriages exist without licensing.

The fact is: to fully get to know someone: you need to live with them!

[Junket]

I've pissed on all of your arguments.

[SelflessnHumble]

I've pissed on all of your arguments.

The truth is never easy to deal with, is it?
Too bad you cannot articulate into a cohesive sentence as to WHY you feel this way...Interesting, isn't it?

[Junket]

The truth is never easy to deal with, is it?
Too bad you cannot articulate into a cohesive sentence as to WHY you feel this way...Interesting, isn't it?

Nope.
_____

[SelflessnHumble]

Nope.
_____

--------------

Exactly.

[HeartIsAching]

Let me tell you something about *marriage* just so you can know the truth behind it:

Prior to the Cvil War? There were no marriage licenses and Blacks were considered livestock animals...Never considered a human being...
So...AFTER the Civil War when African Americans' status's were elevated (to be granted privileges)

The sole purpose of a Marriage license (instituted just after the Civil War) was to allow Blacks to intermarry with Whites.... <--------------Fact
2nd Fact: Once you get a marriage license: you grant the STATE the power to become a 3rd party!!!
Last fact: Getting ANY license: means YOU are asking permission for the privilege to be ___________ (in this case married) recognized by the State...

Common Law Marriages exist without licensing.

The fact is: to fully get to know someone: you need to live with them!

Abso-freakin'-lutely. One of my major complaints about marriage. It's NOT the business of the State. They should not be able to regulate or control it AT ALL. At BEST, they should keep the records. Period.

It's also not a religious issue - lots of people get married to each other that never have anything to do with any church.

So - what is it? Simply this:

A Marriage is a covenant between two people. It's nobody's business but theirs. My wife and I (yes, I call her that, and she calls me her husband) have never legally married... yet we're married to each other. We actually plan on doing it soon-ish mostly due to insurance benefits and privileges. We're thinking maybe my birthday this year... I've told her that I'd be getting best birthday present ever.

[girl68]

There is no point in moving in together while merely dating, at least for the female. She gets to give him free sex, cook/clean for him, while he can continue to live a single's life? Not a good deal if you ask me.

What in the hell are you talking about? Haha, maybe your woman does and you act all single but that doesn't fly for everyone. My guy is just as domesticated (or lack of) as I am. Sex isn't provided TO him, it's mutually desired and enjoyed by both. I cook and clean just as much as he does. And he is hardly single nor does he act like it, same for moi.

[vashti]

The fact is: to fully get to know someone: you need to live with them!

Hah! You think living with someone is any guarantee you "know" them? People evolve over time, and their needs change in ways that cannot be anticipated, whether you live with them before getting married, or not.

I - for one - do not consider "common law" marriages to be a marriage at all. In fact, I consider it a way for people (usually male) to avoid getting married. Say what you will about marriage, but the truth is that most women want a man who loves them enough to take this step.

[girl68]

I consider it a way for people (usually male) to avoid getting married.

I'm actually going to agree on this. I'd bet that I would have been engaged quite a bit earlier than 3.5 years if we didn't live together. But I also know that I'd rather have gotten to enjoy him for those 3.5 years as his common law partner. I'm happy we took the long road of ups and down before getting to the next stage, and our engagement is another 'long-ish' road before we get married. Beats out getting engaged at the height of romance and marrying then experiencing the ups and downs.

[HeartIsAching]

Again, a marriage isn't a piece of paper issued by the state, nor does it have to be sanctified by a particular church (which one?!), it's a commitment between people. Because my wife and I have not bothered to beg the state for permission to be married, should we regard ourselves as less committed to each other? Say we're just living together, and I introduce her as my girlfriend... would that be an accurate representation of our relationship? Not to us. She's far more to me than just a girlfriend... or even a live-in girlfriend. She's my wife. If I introduce her as my wife, people immediately understand the import of our relationship. They can also see the wedding bands we wear.

We will be married legally, and probably soon, but it's mostly a matter of taxes/health insurance/life insurance/death benefits, etc.

[HeartIsAching]

Hah! You think living with someone is any guarantee you "know" them? People evolve over time, and their needs change in ways that cannot be anticipated, whether you live with them before getting married, or not.

I - for one - do not consider "common law" marriages to be a marriage at all. In fact, I consider it a way for people (usually male) to avoid getting married. Say what you will about marriage, but the truth is that most women want a man who loves them enough to take this step.

The first part of this is very true. After living with my girlfriend for a year, I proposed to her (which negates your second paragraph, BTW) and a year after that we were married... and that lasted all of three years, mostly due to the fact that we didn't truly know each others hearts well enough.

[Kaius]

Marriage is certainly not just a piece of paper. If you think it is, then you never lost $500,000 in a divorce. That's how much my divorce cost me, and yes it was painful.
If I hadn't married her, I wouldn't have lost so much. So a marriage is actually more binding than you can imagine. It's serious stuff!

I'm just glad I got out of it by age 35, and not 53. It would suck to have my best years drained by someone so wrong for me. I could very well date my fiancee indefinitely,
but I want to be married to her because she and I are 2 peas in a pea pod.

[Hurl3y]

Like I mentioned if you are in Canada you are considered as married after 6 months so it doesn't matter if you get married or not, you still have to go through divorce proceedings if you separate.

This is completely untrue. You do not have to go through divorce proceedings. You do have contact a lawyer if you need to split up equal owned assets (ie. a house).

[HeartIsAching]

This is completely untrue. You do not have to go through divorce proceedings. You do have contact a lawyer if you need to split up equal owned assets (ie. a house).

I don't know about Canada, but here in most states, Common-Law marriages have to be filed for. The difference is that there need be no ceremony, and both parties do not have to sign/agree to it. If you can prove that you've been cohabiting (and the term varies from state to state) for __ years, you can go to the court, get the papers, fill them out and file them... and that's it. You're done, no matter what the other party wants. After that you DO need a divorce if you split.

[HeartIsAching]

The sole purpose of a Marriage license (instituted just after the Civil War) was to allow Blacks to intermarry with Whites.... <--------------Fact
2nd Fact: Once you get a marriage license: you grant the STATE the power to become a 3rd party!!!
Last fact: Getting ANY license: means YOU are asking permission for the privilege to be ___________ (in this case married) recognized by the State...

Actually, I thought some of this sounded a bit hinky so I did a bit of research...

Marriage licenses were used as a mechanism to PREVENT interracial (why do we call it interracial? Aren't we all the same race?) marriage. The legality of that was later struck down by the Supreme Court.