Ex wants to remain friends and talk on the phone

[Roxanne]

My bf of 6 months broke up with me. We were in a LDR, but only 3 hours apart by train. He broke up with me because I always started fights about nothing, mostly jealousy stuff. He gave me plenty of chances before, now he says he doesn't believe I can change, although I am convinced that I've transformed into a better person. He said he wants to be single.
I begged and cried to take me back, because I really love him and want to change..but he said let's stay friends.

We broke up 6 days ago, the first days all i did was to text message him with "please let;s get back together, it'll be different " etc, 2 days ago he said I should stop being that desperate. Since then we talked on the phone almost just like before,sometimes he initiates the call, but he said I shouldn't bring the "getting back together" subject and calm down and talk like 2 friends.
Do you think I should continue like that? Can this be a way of getting back together even though he said he doesn't think we're ever going to do that?
I love him and it hurts to be just friends.. but I'd do anything to take me back..
Thank you!

[oldskool83]

Look you cant change somone once they are done. Id like my ex g/f back of 2 years but i cant change her mind, shes done, built a wall. crying and texting him may seem like the right things to do but its not. Its not helping anything. People confuse the minds thoughts vs the hearts thoughts when this stuff happens.

U may love him as i love my ex, but we cant be in love anymore id we are not together wanting to talk and work things out. People change.

Hang with some friends, maybe tell your parents, try and sleep at a friends house over the weekend. Its not easy but it'll get better...may take awhile if u felt so strong for him but look at it this way, he didnt feel as strong as you thought he did towards you.

Hope that helps.

[xxazurexx]

I wouldn't advise it.

I was in 'exact' your situation with an ex, we were far apart and I'd thought the same as you. That chatting etc would bring us close again and we'd get back together, but it didn't.

The whole situation dragged on for TWO years - just chatting via phone every day, nothing ever changed.

You will find that it is also hard to be friends with someone who doesn't want you back and you will start to resent being his friend and when you continue to remain stuck in the friendzone and nothings changing.

Up to you though, your life....

[oldskool83]

its not easy to be friends with an ex. i am frined with some from HS but thats different. i cant be friends with my current ex and she wants to be my friend...hell shes doing my laundy now and in my house ever day watching tv and using my PC....why well cuz i own her biz she runs outta my house until she paid me back, all the bills are in her name...kinda messed up but least she not there when i get home and has realized i dont want to talk to her. its best if you can break clean 1st and never see them again...my BS mess is little more complicated but ill clear up in a few months.

[SelflessnHumble]

You sound like a young a desperate and groupie. Get a little self respect first.
Next, you need to learn how to be self confident (not self conscious) Why? The world is a stage.
There is someone hotter, smarter and (superficially) better than you out there. You will come across them.

If he's grabbing their chest, their ass and checking them out in front of you? You have a reason to feel hurt, not jealous.
Being jealous is a horrible trait to have. If a guy does that to you? He doesn't give a shit about you period.

Should you continue to bother and nag him? NO.
He doesn't want to be with you because he sees you as an emotional psycho hose beast (no offense of course)

If you truly loved him: you would have treated him better. You did not. Why? Because you DID NOT LOVE HIM.

[Roxanne]

I posted this thread because I wanted to get some general opinion about my problem, not about me. I didn't ask you to judge me! Some just write on these forums and judge people just to make themselves better, I think that's your case also.. But anyways, you're free to write whatever you want!

[SelflessnHumble]

I posted this thread because I wanted to get some general opinion about my problem, not about me. I didn't ask you to judge me! Some just write on these forums and judge people just to make themselves better, I think that's your case also.. But anyways, you're free to write whatever you want!

Look up the word judgment. Thanks.
I'm observing your behavior based on your posts.

I'm not proud of it but I've done way worse than what you've done to your man.
You asked a question, I answered it. You don't like it? Fine. What are you expecting here? Coddling?

Someone to lie to you and tell you he will take you back?
I don't need to judge you to make myself feel better. I know I'm already awesome.
-And I know how to treat my woman.

I shared with you my experiences being the cheater and being cheated on.
I'm sorry you took offense (when I said no offense)

[Maple1714]

You know most people act or seem to be acting like some desperate fool with no self respect after a break-up. It's hard to go through a break-up with someone you really love. You have to be strong and not have any contact with your ex at all. The whole friend thing doesn't work...not as long as someone still has feelings. Space and time is NEVER bad. Goodluck!