Boyfriend vs Best Friend

[insanearchitect]

Long story cut short, I was introduced to my roommate's boyfriend two years back. We had so much in common that we hit it off immediately and I soon became his best friend and we became very attached to each other. During this time my roommate (his then girlfriend) did not quite get along with me for other reasons that had nothing to do with him. They both were having big problems in their relationship despite dating for 5 years and I was often his shoulder to cry on about how unhappy he was with her because she did not give him any time or attention.

Finally this new year he broke up with her. After that we became much closer and started developing feelings for each other which we admitted to each other as well. This is where things get twisted because I too have a boyfriend since three years and am quite happy with him, but I cannot deny that I am terribly attracted to my best friend. He claims to be very attracted to me too but says he is scared it will destroy our intimate friendship. So we decided to ignore this attraction and remain best friends like before.

But since 2 weeks his ex-girlfriend that he broke up with has been giving him a lot of attention and says she wants to get back with him again. While my friend has said he wants a break from their relationship for at least 6 months they speak to each other everyday now as friends and I am extremely jealous because he is trying to work things out with his ex-girlfriend.We speak for like 3-4 hours a day, but it makes me feel worse because I am not dating him and he might work things out with his ex.

I am very confused as to what I should do now because I know I really like him although I have a boyfriend who is unbelievably sweet to me. I cannot deal with my best friend getting back together with his ex-girlfriend despite the two of us vocally admitting that we have very strong feelings for each other and cannot go a day without speaking.

HELP..!

[Mongoose]

I think you're going to have to make a choice. It's not fair on your boyfriend to continue in this manner. Essentially you appear to be emotionally cheating on him with your 'best friend', his roommate, while hanging on to your current relationship simply because your bf is a nice guy. The problem for you is that the guy you really like seems intent upon getting back with his girlfriend at some point in the future. Surely attraction + intimate friendship ought to = "I should go out with this girl". I guess your friend is going to have to make a choice between you and his ex as well. Either way, you appear to be wasting your current boyfriend's time and I think you need to let him know at some point so that he can move on and find the right person for him.

[Bo]

cheater, cheater...you DO know that's cheating emotionally right?

And the issue is not his ex-girlfriend, if it's not her then it will just be some other girl. Get over it, you can't have your cake and eat it too. And that's f*cked up that your having this type of relationship while with your bf.