he already has another girlfriend, back to square one

[ashley89]

as many of you know, me and my ex broke up 2 months ago. I've been doing pretty good in the process of healing, I've had my rough days but I was on the right track to getting better.

today, I found out he's going out with a girl. now, this upsets me because obviously my feelings are still somewhat there and I'm not over this completely. I would be upset if it were any girl, but it makes it even worse that I know this girl. me, my ex, and this girl Jess all worked together. it was at this job that I met my ex and started dating him. I always had an inclination that Jess liked my ex because of the way she acted, but I knew that they were friends and never let it bother me. they would text every now & then, and even after I quit working there, I knew they worked together everyday and for some reason I never thought much more of it. if she liked him, it didn't matter because I was his girlfriend and I'm not the type to get all paranoid and jealous over things like that.

when we were breaking up, I was mad and I said "well good, now you can hook up with Jess, have fun with that" and my ex was like "what? what are you talking about? I would never do that, she's like a sister to me, we're good friends, she looks like my aunt!" blah blah blah. I know guys say bad stuff about girls when they really "like" them. all throughout our relationship he talked shit about this girl, said she had a bad body, was weird/annoying, talked too much, was really weird (she has a few disorders & is basically addicted to adderall). I mean, all this, and now they're DATING?

even though I somewhat saw this coming, it still came as a big shock to me. now I'm back to square one, I almost feel as though I've been dumped all over again. it's making me re-evaluate our entire relationship... I mean, did he like her all along? how long was this shit going on? I feel even worse, cause now I feel like I was lied to and rejected and she was chosen over me and it's just horrible. I also feel like it's so soon after we broke up. and so weird that he now has dated 2 girls that he worked with... AT THE SAME JOB!

some people who work there now commented on it and were like "aww congrats! we saw this coming!" again, making me feel more horrible. anyways, I officially deleted both of them off facebook, deleted all pics of my ex off my computer and camera, got rid of him in my phone, and literally have nothing else of him in my life. except in my stupid mind I just had to get this off my chest.

[seganomics]

I'm sorry ashley I know how you feel. Two weeks after my ex broke up with me he slept with his ex=girlfriend. I was also so worried about them being friends because I was sure she still had feelings for him. What was worse was he took her to see the nutcracker... the tickets were a gift to the two of us from his grandfather.

Good for you for deleting them. it gets a little easier not having that temptation.

Hope you make it thru.

[sweetkissesforu]

remember ashley he was not that great of boyfriend he was rather selfish forget it move on go do something fun to get your mind off it consider this his rebound lol

[silly girl]

Hi Ashley, I've been in the same situation, we've been together a year and a half, he broke my heart, lied to me, and after few months got involved with a girl he spoke very bad of. Now, after four months I hear that they are planning to live together. We work together to, so, I know exactly how you feel. Everybody is saying that she is his guardian angel, that she is sweet, simpatic... I guess I was not. Even though I loved him more than life! I never liked her much, like a sixth sence, I think, but stupid me, I even defended her when he said uglly hings.. Now she will be his wife. What is wrong here????? Since you work together, prepare youself, first new alveay hurt the most, after that you will get used to it and it will not hurt as much. Try to distance yourself from these kind of talk, dont listen to what peole are saying. It will be tough, but eventually you will get over it.
And please don't try to confront him in the moment of anger, I did that, it was a huge mistake. Maybe if you feel that you have to say something to him, do it when you are calm. Or even better don't do it at all.
Hang in there, and remember you did nothing wrong, you should trust your partner in a relationship, sometimes they just don't deserve it.

[silly girl]

Sorry for my English, I could try to improve it now that I have extra free time!

[ashley89]

Hi Ashley, I've been in the same situation, we've been together a year and a half, he broke my heart, lied to me, and after few months got involved with a girl he spoke very bad of. Now, after four months I hear that they are planning to live together. We work together to, so, I know exactly how you feel. Everybody is saying that she is his guardian angel, that she is sweet, simpatic... I guess I was not. Even though I loved him more than life! I never liked her much, like a sixth sence, I think, but stupid me, I even defended her when he said uglly hings.. Now she will be his wife. What is wrong here????? Since you work together, prepare youself, first new alveay hurt the most, after that you will get used to it and it will not hurt as much. Try to distance yourself from these kind of talk, dont listen to what peole are saying. It will be tough, but eventually you will get over it.
And please don't try to confront him in the moment of anger, I did that, it was a huge mistake. Maybe if you feel that you have to say something to him, do it when you are calm. Or even better don't do it at all.
Hang in there, and remember you did nothing wrong, you should trust your partner in a relationship, sometimes they just don't deserve it.

thanks so much. it sucks being in this situation, but there's really nothing I can do about it now. thankfully I quit that job last year so we don't work together anymore, but we all used to... I guess it just hurts knowing that all along she liked him and in the end she kinda "won" him... but I know I shouldn't think that way. he wasn't a good boyfriend and I should look at it as her getting my sloppy seconds

[butterfly81]

im in the same boat we have been split up just over 2 month and he posts a pic of his new girlfriend it shit isnt it , i called him to ask if this had be going on and was it the reason that we split up i will never know , i dont think you post a pic of your new beau if its only been a couple of week do you ????

[Boisdevie]

As hard as it is to bear, once your relationship is over what he/she does is no longer any of your business.

[Petit Papillon]

Yeah , I got together with my current bf like... 3-4 weeks after the break up ? Hell I could have done it few days after cause my ex was such an asshole and he deserved to feel like shit

But it's true,as soon as people break up, they owe nothing to each other ... At least emotionally .

[silly girl]

Maybe I sound idealistic, but I really think that you do owe something to your ex. If someone wants to break up it is ok, people do fall out of love , its a fact, but if the other person is hurt and you know it, especially in the longer relationships were the other person is not just loosing a partner, but also a friend, you should try to do your best not to make things worse for them. So, at least in my case, he should have told me himself. I would respect him for that, and now I do not respect him at all, and fought a great battle to respect myself again. There is no need for that, really!
Think that is my anger coming out! The last fase of a recovery, I've heard. Yeah!

[ashley89]

yeah, I know that he owes nothing to me and vice versa and it's over and all that. but that doesn't lessen the pain! it still sucks and it's gonna suck for a little while.

the part that bothers me the most is the fact that this happened so shortly after our breakup, which just proves the point that she liked him all along, and he possibly liked her too. I know I would be upset if it were ANY new girl, but the fact that I knew and worked with this girl just hits way too close to home. now I'm re-evaluating a bunch of shit about our relationship, all these little things are coming together and bothering me. I knew all along she liked him and eventually something would happen, I can't explain it but I just had a strong instinct and I was right. it just sucks!

all I can do now is move forward and keep going with my healing process. this was a little setback but hopefully I can overcome it and continue on my way to being happy without him =)