Boyfriend LOST it on me? Please help :(

[HereComesTheSun]

So lately my boyfriend has been constantly criticizing me everyday all day.. I will try explain the best i can.

I work in a supermarket and i know a lot of the people their that work and they are mostly my age. Sometimes i will be on my breaks with guys/girls.. And we will exchange numbers. I feel thats innocent.. They are in our group of friends and tell me to call them or they will call me if they are in town out and about and to join them etc.. I have no interest in the guys that i talk to.. I only really look at my boyfriend in that way etc.. And i DONT text the guys constantly or even at all.. They are just on my phone for contact..
Well my boyfriend has been looking through my phone recently and has gone mad at the guys numbers in my phone. Doesnt see texts or anything.. Because i dont text them ever.. But just the numbers. Saying im obviously flirting with other men etc..

The 2nd thing is that my password to everything on the computer, everything at work is the same password i have always used since i was 14. Includes my 1st boyfriends name. Okay, so i could have changed it.. But it just didnt think it was a big deal.. Just a jumble of letters. Well the other day he asked for my password to facebook so i gave him it and he flipped. Saying it was like him engraving his ex lovers into his belongings..

He has been constantly getting at me.. Saying im acting trashy and im not a one man kind of girl. I am!! I really am and have no interest in anyone but him.. This is really getting me down So i apologised over and over. Deleted all the numbers in my phone.. He said i was allowed 2 guys in there, as he only had 2 girls in his?? (this really p*ssed me off).. And i changed all my passwords to HIS name.
But it isnt enough for him.. He carries on, saying i should have just done it without being told to.. That if i dont start acting more 'classy' that i can forget about us.. That im ignorant and have no common sense.. Just REALLY tearing a strip off me..

I have just been apologising and he just keeps going on and on and on...Today at work he text me over 100x!!!!NO joke.. I couldnt reply but the txts were just non-stop how trashy i am.. How stupid iv been.. Saying he was going to do it to me so i could feel how he felt..

I just cant take his criticizm anymore.. We had sex last night and i felt like everything would be okay.. But right after he started on me again. Ignored me in bed.. I just felt so used and dirty it broke my heart so much i swear i felt a pain in my chest.. Sigh..

How can i stop this?? What else can i say to him for him to know its only him i want?? Iv apologised and i just dont really know what else i need to do for him to stop acting like this.

Was i really in the wrong? I just dont feel like im doing something SO bad that i deserve him talking to me like this..

Can anyone please give me some advice..

[HereComesTheSun]

Ugh, just for an update now hes saying he's done with me.. Saying that all the disrespectful things have added up so much he cant take it anymore I just dont understand what i did SO bad.. We have been together for nearly 2 years now and he's just saying all this over texts.. I feel sick and dont know what to do or say I just dont understand..

[Ric]

You have NO reason to apologize. You have EVERY reason to break up with him. Don't let yourself get treated this way. Tell him to either pull himself together and treat you with respect and trust, or just **** off all together.
In all honesty, I'd not even bother to fix this and just dump his ass right now.
He is an abusive asshole and it will likely only get worse and worse. And even if he pretends to trust you for now, I will assure you he'll spy on what you do and trashtalk about you to his friends.
You can do better than that.

Before you break up with him, though (which you really should), change all your passwords so he can't mess with that. He has no business knowing your passwords anyway.

[Ric]

Ugh, just for an update now hes saying he's done with me.. Saying that all the disrespectful things have added up so much he cant take it anymore I just dont understand what i did SO bad.. We have been together for nearly 2 years now and he's just saying all this over texts.. I feel sick and dont know what to do or say I just dont understand..

Hmm, likely... he found someone else and is just making up excuses to either break up with you or get you to break up with him.

[Mongoose]

You're better off without him. He sounds like a control freak and a bad bf. Move on and get someone better.

[steviej]

He's a manipulator. He's destroying your self esteem and confidence so he can completely control you. He wants you to beg for him back so you will feel greatful and completely submissive to him. He's a total head case, what business is it of yours who's phone numbers you have, what your passwords are etc.
Get him out of your life before you become a shadow of your former self.

[HereComesTheSun]

Hmm, likely... he found someone else and is just making up excuses to either break up with you or get you to break up with him.

Ugh that just makes me feel even sicker than i did, Maybe im being naive but i dont think he has found someone else.. I dont know maybe im wrong.. I just cant take this anymore. Its CONSTANT...
Its really just brought me down today. But i cant stand the thought of losing him and not having him in my life.. I just thought that things might get better if we worked harder to make it work.
I just feel like my worlds crumbling right now.. and he wont even speak to me..

Is it reallly worth just leaving him? I think somedays that i should but i dont feel like i could move on without him. I am so head over heels for him and hes acting like this its driving me crazy.. Im so hurt ..

[Horseyguy]

You are suffering from low self esteem and he knows it which is why he's doing this because he knows he can get away with it, get rid of him before he takes what is left.

You don't need that sort of negativity in your life, go find someone that will treat you right. And when he begs for you to take him back (and he will) tell him you are not interested.

Stand up for yourself and take back the control in your life, you don't deserve this.

If you stay with him or take him back you will only have yourself to blame.

[Ric]

Ugh that just makes me feel even sicker than i did, Maybe im being naive but i dont think he has found someone else.. I dont know maybe im wrong.. I just cant take this anymore. Its CONSTANT...
Its really just brought me down today. But i cant stand the thought of losing him and not having him in my life.. I just thought that things might get better if we worked harder to make it work.
I just feel like my worlds crumbling right now.. and he wont even speak to me..

Is it reallly worth just leaving him? I think somedays that i should but i dont feel like i could move on without him. I am so head over heels for him and hes acting like this its driving me crazy.. Im so hurt ..

Well, can't be sure, but it's what it sounds like to me.
What I am sure of is that you should leave him. You'll feel like shit for some time, but afterwards you'll realize you're way better off without him.

[Horseyguy]

Ugh that just makes me feel even sicker than i did, Maybe im being naive but i dont think he has found someone else.. I dont know maybe im wrong.. I just cant take this anymore. Its CONSTANT...
Its really just brought me down today. But i cant stand the thought of losing him and not having him in my life.. I just thought that things might get better if we worked harder to make it work.
I just feel like my worlds crumbling right now.. and he wont even speak to me..

Is it reallly worth just leaving him? I think somedays that i should but i dont feel like i could move on without him. I am so head over heels for him and hes acting like this its driving me crazy.. Im so hurt ..

Seriously?? You like being treated like that???

To be blunt .. It doesn't matter how you feel about him, how much you love him. What he is doing is abusing you and you are allowing it to continue. Fact is he doesn't feel the same about you, if he did he wouldn't treat you like that, plain and simple.

[sadybug]

Honey, I had a guy do the same thing to me. He even got to the point where he put his hands on me. You don't deserve to be treated that way. Especially when you aren't doing anything wrong. You are allowed to have friends honey. You can do so much better. You need to find a guy that will treat you like a princess. I don't know if this will help you but I wish you the best of luck with your situation dear.

[vertical_sky]

Dan Savage has a phrase: DTMFA. Dump the Mother ****er Already.

This guy is INSANE. Demanding you give him the password to your Facebook... texting you over 100 times... having sex with you then ignoring you, saying you're not even allowed to have other guy's PHONE NUMBERS.... Just no. No, no, no. He is being a HUGE asshole, and YOU cannot fix him. YOU cannot save him, YOU do not deserve this kind of treatment. There is absolutely nothing in your behavior (granted it's your side but still) that suggests you are anything but respectful and trustworthy. Do NOT let this jerk bring you down. He does not deserve you, he doesn't even deserve the opportunity to have sex again until he grows the hell up.

If he's insisting he's done with you, GOOD. Let him be. Rejoice! You are dodging a MAJOR bullet.

[HereComesTheSun]

I know what all of you guys are saying is true. I have left him before.. But i ended up running back to him, i was just a zombie for days and it seemed i couldnt function, i missed work i cried all day and night. It was awful and i just didnt feel strong enough to leave him.
I have lost all my friends and i know its all my fault. When i met him i thought he was a great guy. He was truthful, he's always been loyal to me which is something that i have never had before..And he uses that against me too. He says il never find anyone like him. He is very well liked with everyone around us here, he has trash talked me to his friends i know that, he's said stuff in front of all our friends. He apologised and said it was because he is so protective of me he cant stand other men touching me..etc..

I know i need to leave him now.. I have actually just HAD ENOUGH. I feel like if he chipped away at me anymore i would be stuck with this sad face for the rest of my life.. Like the zombie i feel like now .. I couldnt even explain how sh*tty i feel allll the time. I just dont know how to pull the strength together to actually do it..I know he wouldnt make me feel this way if he actually loved me.. But alot of the times he really makes me 'feel' loved..
Even when i turn around and ask for an apology for the names he called me today, he said 'no.. If you didnt play upto your name i would be able to apologise'.. Like i just dont understand how he does this to me.
He makes me so MAD!!!

He has turned around and asked me to try again with him now, remembering the things that annoy him the most and to stop disrespecting him. So i said okayy.. Will you stop the things you do that make me upset? And he said that he doesnt do anything.. We should concentrate on my doing first...
He frustrates me so much..

I havnt always been an angel since i have known him. I do know i sometimes enjoy attention from men when we go out together, i will admit i have flirted with men. Not intentionally to hit on another man, but just having a laugh. I have never and would never cheat on him.. All i ever really do is work.. clean and see him. Just so you guys know, im not trying to blame this all on him.. Im not. I just want to know what the right thing to do is..Sometimes i just *cannot understand* why he is always on at me.. But he acts like i am absolutely stupid why i cannot see why he is so upset?? Thats what frustrates me...

Also, i dont like been treated like this at all. Sometimes i just am not sure if he has a right to be like this with me.. I just am not sure if what he is saying is true? Thats why i have come here.. To just know if what he is saying is correct. That his complaints are valid.. Because i dont want to just leave him if really its me in the wrong ..

Like i sometimes dont know what is okay for me to do and what isnt?? Is it really a big no no for other men to be on my phone? Let alone text or call me.. To meet other men and be friendly? I think he expects me to be cold towards other men and that just isnt me.. In my only other serious relationship i dont remember it really being like this.. Never jealous like this..

[Ric]

You actually should be blaming this all on him. Whatever you did, it does not warrant the treatment he is giving you. He is a lowlife, and you will realize that one day. And then you'll blame yourself over not dumping him right away.
You'll meet a new guy that actually respects you and makes you feel happy at all times.

[HereComesTheSun]

Thankyou.. And im sorry for my rambling i am just very confused and upset right now.
I feel like im constantly trying to move on and just forget about him.. I just find it very hard to when hes telling me he loves me and would do anything for me. Because i DO love and care for him.. And when we are together it is like he does love me.. And does respect me. Its just times when things like this come up he just turns on me..