showing off/impressing

[JYH]

I've been reading about how people who show off and try to impress others are actually "insecure deep down" and I want to get this part of my life handled if thats really true. I'm 18 and my whole life I've loved showing off (but not to the point where it annoys the hell out of everyone) and I love the idea of "showing people up when they have all doubt against you," I guess it somewhat fuels any motivation I may have. Also things like wearing "hype" clothing cause it makes me feel good and to "turn heads" and whatnot are also things I like to do which relates to showing off. I've really been trying to work on being better with girls, and if showing off really indicates insecurity and neediness, I'm sure they can detect that pretty easy and I'd like to get rid of it but im not sure exactly how I'm supposed to work on this area so any help would be appreciated.

oh, and please dont say "JUST STOP," like I haven't heard that before lol....

[Lipp]

There's a difference between showing off to feel confident, and showing off because you are confident. For the first, the lack shines through if you're put in an unexpected/awkward situation, and feels construed - the latter is more carefree and robust.

[MerryH]

oh, and please dont say "JUST STOP," like I haven't heard that before lol....

Okay, well, what do you want us to tell you, then? You're like, "I like to show off, but people don't like it, what should I do? And don't tell me to stop showing off!"

Maybe you can phrase your question in a more succinct manner?

[JYH]

I guess I just want to do find out how to make the transition between the two definitions that Lipp stated, as in not showing off to feel confident, but because you are confident. Will i stop trying to show off to feel confident once I have a high enough self esteem/confidence... or whatever?

[MerryH]

I still don't think I'm understanding your question.

Are you actually confident, or are you just showing off to conceal your lack of confidence?

Either way, I can say that showing off is pretty annoying to other people, whether you realize it or not.

[CraigT]

Ask yourself (and REALLY ask, take yourself away, be alone, close you eyes and relax)

"Am I confident" or "Am I showing off so people 'think' I'm confident"

If it's the 2nd one... Work on yourself.. Find out why you're not and learn to remove
these limiting beliefs you have about yourself.

CraigT aneed4change