Lost love of my life - grass is greener maybe

[fraz1170]

Hello all

I am in desperate need of help.

I have been with my ex for over 8 years and she has moved on and admits she is seeing another and has slept with him.

To cut a long story short I realised that our relationship has been a bit stale for about 12 months now, those 12 months have also contained maybe happy times.

We have two children, but they are from her previously relationship, but they say me as their dad.

Things have been difficult over recent months which led to me moving out for 10 weeks to give her the space she said she needed and at the time of moving out all she was sayng was "I want to be on my own" and "I dont want a relationship anymore". I respected her wishes and moved, but nothing appeared to have changed so I moved back in two weeks ago and have now found out that she considers us over and has been seeing someone for 5 weeks now.

I have been through massive emotional turmoil since I found out and she has moved back to her parents house and continues to see him.

So what I ask for is advice on how to win her back? I admit that I have not been Mr Perfect over the last 12 months and should have paid her more attention. Now I am sure she is experiencing all the excitement of a new relationship, but I love her so much.

Sadly I have already done the begging and pleading thing and that has got me nowhere so any advice on how to win back the love of your life even though she says she has moved on?

Cheers

[steviej]

In my opinion, you can't.

All you can do now is let her know how you feel and leave her to decide. She's already with someone else, i think persuing her will only push her more into the arms of this other guy.
You could try a few things such a sending her some flowers with a note saying you miss her, invite her out for a drink, but i honestly think this would be wasted effort.

Plus, do you really want her back knowing she's been with someone else?

[Boisdevie]

Sounds like a done deal - you have lost her

[xinn1314]

welcome to to the club, its time to move on.

[fraz1170]

hhhhmmmm not so helpful so far guys.

i think i am going to play the long game and cut contact with her and see if she misses me.