I am Still Single and I have no idea what to do next

[theoburray]

I'm 19, male and have never had a girlfriend. Since it's anoymous I might as well admit to a) being a virgin and b) I've NEVER kissed a girl before. So I guess that makes me sound like a loser :-/

I'm not socially awkward, I'd say I'm fairly good looking at the moment as I'm trying to improve my image by getting fitter, have braces so making my teeth straighter, hair looks good at the moment and I feel good mentally too. I have unlimited confidence when I meet and know a girl, I can never make the first move to talk to a girl though that I don't know, I'm shy but once I even know someone after a few words I don't have any nervousness or anxiety and 'I can be myself'.

Anyway there have been two girls I've been interested in the last few months. Both very good looking with personalities to match it. The first girl is one I know from work, now I've always thought she was attractive but I didn't talk to her for 2 years until I had a shift with her in the same department :p Anyway In February I asked for her number, and once I got over sickness of 3 weeks asked her out which she agreed to but she was busy the next week so I didn't pressure her or anything and I asked her out just to a coffee two weeks after that but she never committed and twice said 'I'll see what I'm doing' and get back to you. (First time I asked for coffee was on the phone then I bumped into her two days later at work, I wasn't specifically there to see her by the way). So I gave up on that girl.

Second Girl was one I met in a club in December who gave me her number, she added me on facebook before I woke up the next morning and I think she was playing a few games with me which I suck at. She rang me on the Saturday Morning in Dec and hung up when I answered but I texted back, I don't know why I didn't ring back but I'm stupid at times. I tried calling her a couple of times but it went to voicemail so I gave that up, until a few weeks ago after the first girl was not an option anymore. I texted her and she replied back but I stuffed that up by saying 'It wasn't for her' because I didn't want to seem like a creep for contacting her MONTHS after I last saw her, I still asked how she was in the text and everything but I didn't get a reply back. A few days ago she liked my most recent photo on facebook so I decided might as well try once more so last night I texted her asking how she was, but she never texted back. Calling is pointless because literally everytime I've called it's went to voicemail, even when a couple of my mates took my phone and tried calling her a couple months back it went to voicemail. So it looks like I've stuffed up with this girl as well

The worst thing is my lack of experience seems to have gone against me with these two girls, both seemed to have some interest in me with the way they were acting because it wasn't like a girl I was friends with or acting like a girl I know, it was different but even worse than that is my mind has set these two girls as perfect or a benchmark because they were very good looking and attractive so it's going to be hard for me to find a close match to them two (in my mind) for a while. I know I can lower my standards but I feel if I almost got these two girls, I should stay looking up and not fall down.

Girl #1= [url]http://www.loveforum.net/love-advice-forum/51345-i-finally-asked-her-out-she-said-yes-how-am-i-doing.html#post682701[/url]

Girl #2= [url]http://www.loveforum.net/love-advice-forum/52202-should-i-call-her-next-week.html#post690830[/url]

[jessld]

Girl 1 great go for it. With both take it slow see were it goes. Everything will happen when it's time. I have who's older than u and in the same situation so yeah ur doing great. Just see how u go don't rush it. Remember no1 needs to no bout ur personal sex life. So chin up and go get them ladies

[girl68]

Neither find girl 3. You're picking girls that are used to being chased and they know how to play games. You're a beginner, I suggest you start with shyer more reserved girls. See where that gets you.

[theoburray]

by the way I'm not saying what do I do next to get girl #1 or girl #2. I'm done with them unless they make the move(s) on me.

[jessld]

Games r stupid believe me. If u like someone tell them go for it no game no nothing . if u want a girl don't wait or u might wait forever. Who knows if they r shy n r waiting on u

[theoburray]

yeh both played games which I hated because with a 'game' there are many things you can do but I probably done the wrong things i don't know, at the end of the day I'm only 19 but at the same time I don't want to wait years for my first relationship.

[jessld]

Just games r stupid. B up front. B honest. B u. And no one can knock u for that. Maybe try online dating and have a few random dates and see where that goes. U r still young a relationship will happen when it's time n ur ready.

[theoburray]

Lol to be honest, online dating would be me admitting defeat in myself. I'm 19 not 39 so online dating is a no no lol. Not sure who I go on a 'random date' with although it'd be nice just for experience and stuff.

[girl68]

welcome to the new world about half my friend (mid 20's) have all met their life partners online.

[theoburray]

True but im not in my mid 20's and I am not desperate enough to go online dating (Desperation in my case, not everyones by the way). I don't believe in online dating, I don't like the idea of filtering and all of that. I want to find my girlfriend(s) myself and have an instant connection instead of using my internet connection :p

Buy online dating won't help my confidence in terms of going up to random girls and stuff plus I'm 19, not many 19 year olds use online dating. It is more of a 25+ thing. But having said I'm not using online dating anytime soon.

[jessld]

Okay than go to speed dating or single nights. So u can talk to them face to face, have the confidence and know they r single so u can practise walking up to them. B4 u say it's for old people maybe you need to try it. If that is a no than practise in front of the mirror and ask random girls in the shops.

[VincenzoG91]

19 is a tough age for a guy trying to date. Women of all ages tend to look for a guy who is at least a little older. At 19, that means the girls who are going to most interested in you are in high school and often underage. Things will get easier in time, but you're looking for a date now. Try meeting women in more natural situations, not work or in clubs. I'm not religious, but plenty of normal women of all ages go to church and they aren't necessarily uptight puritans. Or maybe there is a coed sports activity you can get into, or volunteer work.

[lostnconfused22]

Your only 19! There must be other things you wana do then get in a relationship??? =) Travel?? Work in another country or city?? Its awesome when your that age coz you travel meet new people and ypou generally pick up women anyway. Not neccesarily the long term relationship types but there is always usually a good time had lol

[jessld]

Your only 19! There must be other things you wana do then get in a relationship??? =) Travel?? Work in another country or city?? Its awesome when your that age coz you travel meet new people and ypou generally pick up women anyway. Not neccesarily the long term relationship types but there is always usually a good time had lol

Dude this is true. I was living in New York when I was 18/19 maybe u do need to travel see the world and ull meet girls along the way. Go travel go enjoy life.

[theoburray]

Well I live in Australia and I used to live in the UK, I've been to USA, Spain, New Zealand and a couple other countries and I'm going back to visit family in the UK next year plus possibly a holiday in QLD (a party state here) with mates, plus I'm applying for an internship for the summer (Nov-Feb) related to my degree so I'm living my life. I just wanna continue the good trend.

however...my past came back today :p I was at the library and I exited anyway, along the corridor out the exit there is a cafe to the right, quite a business class cafe. Like a guy like me by myself how I was dressed wouldn't probably go in there (there isn't a specific dress code though, it's laidback but posh) and I'm 83% sure I stared point blank at Girl #2. Now I remember reading on her facebook that's where she worked but I forgot about that, at the time I was texting a friend and she walked past a couple of times but it looked very busy, some sort of business type party and she didn't look too happy, the chances are it was her because I doubt there is two girls who work there who look exactly the same. Since I've only seen her once before in the flesh, thats where the 83% came in. Anyway, I didn't say a word and neither did she, it looked like a tense environment for her so I didn't want to start a conversation especially since I'd probably get her in trouble (it's not very big place so her boss could see if she is slacking) but I didn't say hello because of that and as for her either she recognised me and just ignored me but odds are she was the same as me to be honest, I look different then how I did 4 months ago, obviously not dramatic but if the last time you saw a person was 4 months ago it's quite a difference. And how I said she liked my last photo on facebook well that was taken in the end of Feb and I wasn't wearing my glasses (I wear my glasses all the time) so I'm sure that didn't help. I could show the photos to prove that i look a bit different but I'd rather you take my word for it. Now my thoughts about it hasn't changed, i'm not going to suddenly pursue her again but it was weird and in a way it kind of hurt. Not something I wanted to see. Mind you she looked fit, nice legs and butt wearing shorts, i was amazed by her beauty but yeah I'd rather i didn't see her.