does she or doesn't she....

[blinki]

any updates neverknow??? very interesting thread!you sound like a nice guy, and i'm interested to see how this works out for you...

[cheeky&sexy]

My honest opinion is that... she doesnt LIKE like you, she just likes you and is a nice outgoing/social person when in the mood?

Not necessarily. When i was reading the original post it actually kind of reminded me of me and a male co worker at my work that im interested in and im trying to figure out if his interested in me too. If this girl is hot and cold with u, like one day is really friendly and talks to u a lot, and the next doesnt really talk to u.. i think that might mean she actually likes u. I tend to do that with the co worker im interested in and its not on purpose, i just feel like i dont want to come across as too interested so then if we have a day when we're talking heaps and getting along i tend to follow it up with not showing interest the next day lol. Girls know guys lose interest if we make it too obvious we like u, and we're scared of rejection so have a tendency to play it safe. She could be doing exactly what i have been doing.

I also think any form of touching the opposite sex is flirtatious.. a lot of people mite disagree but i know i wouldnt feel comfortable being touchy with a guy i had no romantic interest in. i just wouldnt do it. U said she seems quiet and quiet people typically are only touchy if they like and feel comfortable around someone. The thing about the workplace is u start out as friends.. and until someone makes the first move its too hard to tell if the other person likes u as more than a friend or not. So i would suggest leading to a conversation about facebook and then asking her if she has one then add her. Thats not as forward as asking for her number.

[neverknow]

sorry for the lack of update. we've emailed back and forth a few times since she quit. mainly she has complained about the company lol. she friend requested me on facebook. I think I've accepted the fact that she sees me as a friend and no more. I saw on her email profile that shes older than I thought she was...10 years older than me. I know some people say it doesnt make a difference, and it doesnt to me, but I just have doubts that she would want to date someone 10 years younger...I dunno. Anyways, I at least got a friend out of it I guess...I do miss her, and she even said in an email she missed talking to me...and a few others she worked with, but I just know it wont happen. theres plenty of girls at work that are cute, guess I can find a new one to obsess over. my go to since she left is the one that I liked before she started working :p thats my problem. I read a thread on here about "shy guy syndrome" about finding a girl to obsess over and imagining her as the perfect match for me and all that, and thats exactly what I've done my whole life. this other girl I liked would always smile as she walked by, and I was always so nervous around her I couldnt manage to say anything. even when our paths would cross (happened a lot hehe) she'd say something like oops excuse me, and i couldnt say anything. or she would be walking by and look at me expecting me to say something but I never could. see here i go again...fml sorry beer has made me kinda ramble

[blinki]

haha, i'm drinking beer too, makes me ramble and rant...

anyway, it sounds like it's going okay then? at least you're able to be her friend.

so what about this other girl? do you think she could be interested? i don't know, but by what you describe she just sounds like she's being nice. is there anything that indicates it might be more?

[neverknow]

Doubtful. I think I wish there was more behind the long looks and stuff, probably just because she's cute and is one of the few girls at work that doesn't give off that stuck up bitch vibe. Whatever, nothing will happen cuz I'm too chicken to talk to her. So the cycle continues

[blinki]

oh yeah. the stuck up bitch vibe!!! i hate that.

[neverknow]

Yea. There's cute girls all over where I work, some I've seen look over from a distance, but walk by them in a hallway or pathway they look the other direction and completely ignore you. At least this one girl would smile or say excuse me or something

[neverknow]

OK I'm tired of being like this. Maybe this other girl is my best chance to at least start changing. So what do I do? I guess the obvious answer is to walk up and talk but its not that easy. She's a cocktail waitress so maybe ask her for a water and then see if she sticks around to talk? Let me guess I'm overthinking again...

[Cerby]

OK I'm tired of being like this. Maybe this other girl is my best chance to at least start changing. So what do I do? I guess the obvious answer is to walk up and talk but its not that easy. She's a cocktail waitress so maybe ask her for a water and then see if she sticks around to talk? Let me guess I'm overthinking again...

You sure are! You're once again trying to put yourself in a position to let her make the first move. I'll tell you right now she won't, whether she finds you a perfect 10 or one step up from a worn out donkey, she WILL NOT make the first move.

Take the initiative and make the first move. Think of it like this: "What will happen to me if I get rejected?". The answer is actually positive, it will remove many months of "What if?" and heartache. Everyone gets rejected, but your fear of it has crippled you. You need to get over this psychological problem, because the more I read, the more I see someone who is stricken by fear.