Insecure?

[FwedFwintstone]

When I ask my girlfriend a question, sometimes she won't text back for several hours.

I know people think that means Im insecure. But when she's with me, she doesn't mind texting her friends back.

She can't even text back before she gets onto an online game and plays that.

If someone can't even respond to a question without playing a game first and making you wait, how is that insecure?

Now I feel bad.

[reeba]

Are you sure you aren't blowing it out of proportion - that you think she is at her friend's beckoned call, but not yours?

Some people are not attached to their cell phone. I very often do not carry my cell with me, and when carrying it sometimes I don't hear it. It can very easily be a couple of hours or the next day til I reply.

Just prove to yourself that she just happens to be the type that isn't attached to her cell phone. Ask her if she will turn it off during your next date.

[Spring Haze]

Are the questions of importance? Maybe you should only send her texts when necessary.

[SapphireBerry]

making a big deal out of nothing eh? Give her a break she is entitled to her space, if you two talk and text and see each other ALL the time you might find it a destructive mechanism to your relationship with her. I think its healthy to take a break sometimes and she's probably also wanting you to text her and wonder what's going on with her, my mum always told me to let the guys chase me and so I took her advice, she's obviously doing the same. But yeah just get over it, she wants space. Give her it.

[FwedFwintstone]

It's not necessarily the case that they don't reply that bothers me too much, it's that you ask them something and they prefer to play a computer game and keep you waiting instead of replying. It's not the way I would treat someone that I loved, it's not the way I would treat someone who I described as the most wonderful thing thats happened to them.

If all it is is space, or that they prefer to text me at a certain time, then that's fine. But none of this is ever being discussed. It feels Im being left in the dark. I just get told I need to relax and Im insecure.

In response to reeba, my girlfriend is attached to her cell phone. If she wasn't it wouldn't bother me, but knowing she can make time for everyone but me, even computer games take priority, is a little suspect. Maybe it's not computer games, maybe it's her needs and she needs relax time.

[SapphireBerry]

you guys sound a little young anyway to be in love...

anyway, just meet up with her and bring it up without getting all mad at her, obviously its something to be discussed..

[Boisdevie]

My GF often doesn't reply for hours but she loves me so I don't worry.

[SapphireBerry]

exactly what he said..

[FwedFwintstone]

What if your girlfriend says she loves you but she doesn't back it up with action? Such as preferring to play games first and giving you a lower priority than her friends? What if she gets annoyed when you don't text, but annoyed if you text too much (three texts is smothering)? What if she takes you everywhere she wants but then complains that you're spending too much time with her and she doesn't want to get in the way of friends so virtually never agrees to any dates you suggest? What if she can't even be bothered to reply when you ask her how she is feeling knowing she had been ill earlier in the week? What if when you do go on a date and agree a date and time, she can't even text you to tell you when she's going to be there or if she's going to be late - like her actions don't impact on anybody else. Those are the facts, never mind what they all mean.

I would also say, I don't think Im insecure. Im happy with my body, my life, everything outside of this relationship. I'd be happier with the relationship if I wasn't so confused. Im not thinking that she's in another relationship, I don't care if she's had boyfriends before, I don't care if she has to spend 30 days a month without seeing me, I don't care if she has has to see friends and family and keep work commitments. I support that 100%. But the saying goes, actions speak louder than words and some of these actions is like someone who doesn't actually care if they're in a relationship or not.

I just want a little reciprocation, a little politeness, be able to ask questions and not have my head bitten off. I want someone to take a minute of their day and put me first, instead of waiting until they've got nothing better to do.

I'll probably mess it up now by being too silent and not caring as much as I used to.

[Inmanl]

I absolutely understand what your going through there mate, I wouldn't say you were insecure and to the young lady who said you are to young to be in love who is she to tell you whether you are in love.

[SapphireBerry]

maybe tell her that instead of us, and why are you with her then if she treats you like this?

[JBELL]

My boyfriend use to do this to me when we first started going out so i brought it up as a joke saying something like oh yeah and you'll txt it 2 hours later or something and he just said that he didn't know what to say and he would read it and then put his phone down and reply when he wanted to. of course this annoyed me cause all i asked was how are you? how hard is that to reply too lol maybe just ask her but don't seem needy.