What do i do now??

[jenny08]

Hi everyone.
This is my first time posting here, i just dont know who else to turn to.
Here's the problem, i started dating this guy a while back. We went on a few wonderful dates but as things started getting serious he just pushed me away. He stopped staying in touch as much, he did not initiate any more dates. At first i thought that maybe things were going way to quickly for him or that there may be someone else, for we were not exclusive. However, recently i talked to one of his housemates, whom i had gotten to briefly know while i was going out with the guy in question. I told him that we hadnt been on a date in weeks and then he told me that my date has a certain genetic condition that he is very self-conscious about. Its in no way life threatening and can be very much controlled but there are certain, though minor, physical effects. To be honest i had noticed it a little but i had never payed attention to it, it never bothered me enough to ask and i only put the pieces together now when i found out about it. Thus, i still found him attractive and everything. His housemate said, however, that my date has been quite reluctant to enter into serous relationships because of this, especially since this condition is hereditary and that he perhaps doesnt want to take things further because he is worried it may push me away once i know about it.
Now, i dont know this housemate very well at all, i dont even know why he told me, especially since i just dont know what to do now and i dont think he had the right to. I am really attracted to my date and i want to be with him but since he himself never brought this up, do i have the right to now let him know that i know? I'm afraid it may make things worse but at the same time i dont want to let him go just because of this especially since i like him nevertheless.
Please help, thanks.

[Dale Bruce]

I think I saw this question on another site lol

I didn't reply there though, but I will here..

I think on the other site, someone said not to do anything with this information..but for me..I would bring it up..tell him you understand..and you don't want to lose him over such a small thing..When my.."Girlfriend" Accepted my problem..without hesitation..it was wonderful..wonderful to finally be able to..be accepted fully by her..knowing I wasn't hiding anything.
I was scared to tell her..I thought that by telling her..she would leave..Maybe this guy thinks the same way.

My advice..don't tell him how you got the info..but tell him how you feel..and that you don't want to lose him..If he feels the way I did..he'll feel happy that he can finally talk to you about it

[jenny08]

Thank you. I am just afraid that if i tell him he may react badly, considering how he pushed me away. He will also probably ask how i know and if i dont tell him its his housemate who told me he may even become more self-conscious believing that its THAT obvious you know.

[Dale Bruce]

If he's like me..he's pushing away because he thinks you'll leave him..it what I did..then my girlfriend asked why I was doing it..and..I just outright told her..she laughed a bit and said there was no way that would even slightly matter to her!

I felt foolish..I think..he'll react fine. As for the housemate thing..Maybe you should tell him then..I never really thought about that..but yeah if he thinks it's that obvious..that could go a few different ways