Hi All,
I'm hoping someone has some insight for my relationship.
I'm a 25 year old male. I came out of a really horrible 4 year relationship and vowed not to get myself into another sticky situation and focus instead on my university degree (in chemistry lol - wish it was the right kind!)
I think of myself as a very calm, measured and reasonable individual. I'm generally a very happy person and as far as i remember have never yelled, screamed or shown anger towards friends, girlfriends or family. I usually keep a lid on it and go to the gym, cook or go to work.
After leaving my last relationship I started dating about 2 months later. Inadvertently i meant a beautiful young lady at local not for profit organization whom we both volunteer on a regular basis for. One thing lead to another and 4 months after ending my last relationship i started a new one. She is wonderful to me...she brings me soup when i'm sick, if my washing machine breaks down she will come over to help me carry my laundry to the laundry mat, when she comes back into town after working a weekend away she always hopes over to see me first.
When it comes to the sex department, she wants to jump my bones every time i get in the door. I've met her family and they invite me up island regularly. We like the same activities and enjoy spending time together.
We have been together 8 months and have decided to move in together. We found the perfect place that is close to both of our amenities.
There is one kink in our relationship. She tells me im being emotionally guarded, neutral and well a somewhat unromantic. All of these accusations are of course true - i will not contest that. My problem is i fell heads of heels for a girl once and got left out in the cold so im naturally a suspicious person. Since month two I have had a gut instinct that she isn't what she appears to be. There is deception and interference being run on her side.
Because i didn't want to to cause tension in the relationship (i know that sounds stupid) ..i decided to put my worries to rest and do a little homework. If she came up clean id work really hard on trusting her completely and enjoying our time together. Unfortunately this is not the case...i found out she is an escort.
I'm not angry at all ... honest but im very sad and full of anxiety. I'm not sad because she is an escort, i'm sad because she discussed having a future together, kids, moving to Montreal possibly and pursuing careers in both our university area. This seems to be crumbling and tumbling down. I was worried about STIs but already had a blood test and was cleared but this still leaves the possibility of future infections.
I'm not sure how to approach her and tell her i know everything. I'm caught between two rocks ... here is a girl that makes me happy and SEEMS to love me unconditionally but is someone who lies to me every weekend about where she goes and who she services ....