Confidence knock, any advice?

[Yay4sebbe]

Hi I am new to these forums and am not sure if this is the right place to post this but I would like female advice on the following.

My girlfriend and I have taken a long time to get together, she had come out of a relationship that ended badly and I had always thought with my student lifestyle getting into anything serious was both unkind and irresponsible. Anyway, after a few months it became apparent that we couldn't be without each other and after accepting this have been spending most of our time together.

Whenever I am getting intimate either in a fun way or a sensual way I become aroused, get an erection, and desire sex. I just add at this point, despite me having had sex several times while under the influence I had never had sex with someone I had real feelings for. When we start getting naked and try and move from foreplay to sex my erection goes, irrationally and almost instantly. She doesn't like me trying to put it in only semi-hard as she says it hurts so I normally move back to the side and we play around hoping to get going again. By this point both mine and her confidence has been so knocked it has killed the moment and even though often we keep going for a while it very rarely gets going again.

To resolve this I made the stupid decision of taking cialis, and after having one great night (sadly after an evening of party) it made me slightly ill and when I told her she was upset that I had felt I had to do something like this to have sex with her and that she had put too much pressure on me. Since then we have had sex once, she came several times but I did not which seems to be the opposite problem to most people and towards the end again I just went limp.

Has this kind of thing happened to anyone and if so how did you resolve it, it is hitting her confidence as well as mine now and I am worried that it is putting a massive strain on our relationship as we both are starting to avoid getting into a position where it can fail.

Any advice would be great thanks for taking the time.

[imagineallthe]

its nothing wrong with you physically even tho you might think so... its more your psyche belive it or not. some sort of pressure, stress etc but I can't tell exactly what - it's something you need to work on. and yeah of course you're not the only one having experienced that! my friends is dating a guy with the same problem, I think it's more the media and social laws of "what's normal" that says guys are always horney and girls can't reach orgasms unless they have fourty lit candles around them.

Remember to relax, but explain to her that it has nothing to do with HER, perhaps its more the situation itself. try to agree on not having sex for a while but just make out and touch one another. as soon as that expectation is gone, things will flow more freely

[Yay4sebbe]

Thanks imagineallthe that was really helpful, i really hope things pull together! Don't want to mess this up!